I’ve been reading a book called Parenting the Wholehearted Child by Jeannie Cunnion (excellent book by the way) and she talked about how we know we are loved and accepted when we know who we are in Christ. So that got me thinking about how I have spent so many years not feeling accepted because of my body or thinking that I needed to conform to a certain pattern or image of this world. I have learned that there are more issues if I don’t accept my body where it’s at; like I’m accepting defeat. So I started thinking, what would happen if I knew (really knew) and declared who I am in Christ? Because in Christ I AM accepted!
“Those of us who struggle with food, eating, body image, and weight may spend excessive energy performing for acceptance because we equate our self-concept with our outward appearance. When our reflection in the mirror is less than perfect, we may continue to try to improve ourselves and an abusive pattern of starving or stuffing ourselves may persist” (Hunger Within, Chapter 5: Worth Not Shame).
Heidi Bylsma shared an amazing file with me with many truths about who we are in Christ. Today I sat down, with the printed list, and picked out the ones I felt that were most applicable to me in the moment (of course all of them are). And then I wrote down (with some fun colored pencils) on a sheet of paper. I will keep this paper on my bathroom vanity to read each day and confess. These are truths I can renew my mind with. And I know as I renew my mind, God will transform me (Hebrews 12:1-2). As I declare these truths, I will believe them more and more.
You see, it’s not what I do that makes me who I am. It’s not my outside appearance that makes me special. It’s not how well I perform or go about my work. I am who I am because of who I am in Christ–because of what He has done for me. I am accepted because Christ accepts me.
You and I are accepted by Christ no matter what. This list tells us who you are in Christ. So when you look in the mirror, you can lift that chin up and be confident in the Lord despite what you see or wish you could see. You are His beloved! You are accepted!
“This undeniable, unavoidable longing for a sense of value is a sanctified hunger placed in us by God’s design, but we will never experience inner peace until we face the truth that nothing of this world–our appearance, our past or present performance, possessions, or the opinions of other–can fulfill our longing for security and significance…Our hunger within will persist unsatisfied until we can see ourselves not through the eyes of the world but through the eyes of our loving Lord” (Hunger Within, Chapter 5: Worth Not Shame).
When you know who you are in Christ and you know you can accept your body as is, you will start to relax and be thankful for your body. It’s not quitting or giving up. It’s not saying you will never release another pound. It’s being confident that the Lord loves you and accepts you right where you are at and that He will complete the work He has started in you. I really think this is a vital part of the journey toward freedom in this area of our lives, especially if you have been worshiping the skinny idol.
“When we accept ourselves for what we are, we decrease our hunger for power or the acceptance of others because our self-intimacy reinforces our inner sense of security” (Hunger Within, Chapter 5: Worth Not Shame).
When you know who you are in Christ and this journey becomes about what’s within, you focus on your heart relationship with Christ and not the number on a scale. If you are first starting your journey this may feel hard to imagine or accept because you just want the added weight gone. And I can encourage you that you will release weight in conjunction with the Lord working on your inner man as well. It’s pretty amazing!
Would you like to renew your mind with some truths about who you are in Christ? Here are some truths to get you started:
Who I Am In Christ
I am God’s child for I am born again of the incorruptible seed of the Word of God which lives and abides forever 1 Pet. 1:23
I am forgiven all my sins and washed in the blood Eph. 1:7
I am a new creature II Cor. 5:17
I am the temple of the Holy Spirit I Cor. 6:19
I am delivered from the power of darkness and transformed into God’s kingdom Col. 1:13
I am redeemed from the curse of the law Gal. 3:13
I am strong in the Lord Eph.6:10
I am holy and without blame before Him Eph. 1:4
I am accepted in Christ Eph. 1:6
I am blessed Deut. 28:1-14
I am a saint Rom. 1:7
I am qualified to share in His inheritance Col. 1:12
I am the head and not the tail.
I am above only and not beneath Deut. 28:13
I am victorious Rev. 21:7
I am dead to sin Rom.6: 2, 11
I am elect Col. 3:12
I am loved with an everlasting love Jer. 31:3
I am established to the end I Cor. 1:8
I am set free Jn. 8:31-33
I am circumcised with the circumcision made without hands Col. 2:11
I am crucified with Christ Gal. 2:20
I am alive with Christ Eph. 2:5
I am raised up with Christ and seated in heavenly places Col. 2:12
I am His faithful follower Eph. 5:1
I am the light of the world Matt. 5:14
I am the salt of the earth Matt. 5:13
I am called of God II Tim. 1:9
I am brought near by the blood of Christ Eph. 2:13
I am more than a conqueror Rom. 8:37
I am in Christ Jesus by His doing I Cor. 1:30
I am an ambassador for Christ II Cor. 5:20
I am beloved of God I Thess. 1:4
I am the first fruits among His creation James 1:18
I am born of God and the evil one does not touch me I Jn. 5:18
I am a king and a priest unto God Rev. 1:6
I am a joint heir with Christ Rom. 8:17
I am reconciled to God II Cor. 5:18
I am overtaken with blessings Deut. 28:2
I am healed by the wounds of Jesus I Pet. 2:24
I am in the world as He is in heaven I Jn. 4:17
I am a fellow citizen with the saints of the household of God Eph. 2:19
I am sealed with the promise of the Holy Spirit Eph. 1:13
I am complete in Christ Col. 2:10
I am the apple of my Father’s eye Ps. 17:8
I am free from condemnation Rom. 8:1
I am the righteousness of God through Jesus Christ II Cor. 5:21
I am chosen I Thess. 1:4
I am firmly rooted, built up, strengthened in the faith and overflowing with thankfulness Col. 2:7
I am a disciple of Christ because
I have love for others Jn. 13:34-35
I am built on the foundations of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus Himself as the chief cornerstone Eph. 2:20
I am a partaker of His divine nature II Pet. 1:4
I am God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works Eph. 2:10
I am being changed into His image Phil. 1:6
I am one in Christ! Hallelujah! Jn. 17:21-23
I have all my needs met by God according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus Phil. 4:19
I have the mind of Christ I Cor. 2:16
I have everlasting life Jn. 6:47
I have a guaranteed inheritance Eph. 1:14
I have abundant life Jn. 10:10
I have overcome the world 1 Jn. 5:4
I have the peace of God which passes understanding Phil. 4:7
I have access to the Father by one Spirit Eph. 2:18
I can do all things through Jesus Christ Phil. 4:13
I walk in Christ Jesus Col. 2:6
I press toward the goal for the prize of the high calling of God Phil. 3:14
I live by the law of the Holy Spirit Rom. 8:2
I know God’s voice Jn. 10:14
I show forth His praise I Pet. 2:9
I always triumph in Christ II Cor. 2:14
P.S. I created a Sound Cloud recording reading these truths. Enjoy!
Image courtesy of Master isolated images / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
We all want to be accepted for who we truly are. But the truth is that not everyone will accept us. We cannot please everyone. These are truths the Lord taught me years ago and continues to do so. He showed me that He is pleased with me and that if I am living my life focusing on pleasing Him and Him alone, that He will work on the rest.
“Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Galatians 1:10
A few weeks ago, when my son was 3-1/2 months old, we brought him to my husband’s workplace so everyone could meet Joshua. After returning home, I was thinking about how some of my husband’s coworkers were so excited to meet Joshua, but there were also some who hardly even looked his way. This is a 3-1/2 month old, who wouldn’t drool over a sweet little baby who coos and smiles? Apparently not everyone. I was not offended in the least bit. If anything, it inspired this post. The Lord likes to use “life” to teach me important principles and truth.
My son does the basic things in life. He sleeps, he eats, he poops, and it’s usually in that order. When he was in my womb, before I ever laid my eyes upon him, I loved him and delighted in him. He does not need to perform in order for me to love him–I just love him. I think he’s the cutest baby boy ever, but I’m bias because I’m his mother. I want everyone to look at him and go “gaga” over how adorable and sweet my little boy is.
And you know what? I am pretty sure that’s how the Lord, our Heavenly Father, feels about us. He’s like, “See my child? Isn’t she beautiful? I made her? I weaved her together in her mother’s womb. Isn’t she amazing?” But just like what happened when I brought my son to my husband’s work, not everyone feels the same way I do. But it doesn’t mean he’s not cute and super adorable (because, hello, he is!). I mean, look at this face:
Who could resist that?
But you know what, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks about my son, because he is loved!
There are going to be people who get really excited about you and they are going to think you are great, but there are also people who won’t give you a second-glance or think much of you. I think we tend to focus on the people who don’t accept us, instead of focusing on the One who loves us and delights in us. Joyce Meyer says in her book, Approval Addiction (which is a really great read on this subject and I highly recommend it), that 2% of the population won’t like us. I don’t know about you, but I would rather focus on the 98% of the population who does like me! And better yet, on the Lord who loves and accepts me 100% of the time!
Your Heavenly Father thinks so much of you that He sent His One and Only Son to die for you, to save you from your sins, to redeem you from eternal death, to give you power to tread on serpents, and the list goes on and on. Sacrificing His only Son was THE ultimate sacrifice! Your Heavenly Father said you are WORTH it! He likes you!
“The Lord your God in your midst, The Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.”
Zephaniah 3:17
For many years of my life, I felt that I had to perform in order to earn love. If I worked hard enough, I would be loved. If I did the job right, I would be accepted. But I have learned that I’m not going to please everyone at the same time, and getting man’s approval is going to set me up for disappointment later on. I had to get to the place where I saw myself in God’s eyes and focused on what HE says about me instead of what the world says about me or thinks I should be. It doesn’t matter what anyone else says, God loves me and He cares about me. That’s what counts!
And really, I just have to say that this world has problems if they can’t pause and take in the wonder of a cute 3-1/2 month old, right?
I mean, look at him:
God thinks you are pretty cute too!
*wink*
Maybe you don’t think you are too cute. Maybe your parents or someone who should have loved you unconditionally showed you or even told you that they would love you when you were smarter, prettier, skinny, worked harder, got better grades, etc. Sometimes people in our life don’t love us the way God intended for them to love us. But that doesn’t mean we aren’t loveable. God says you are lovable. And He loves you! Maybe you were rejected by those who should have stood by your side. God will never leave you nor forsake you. Christ understands that rejection. He was rejected every day of His life when He was on this earth; and people continue to reject Him and His love every single day. He knows what it feels like to be despised. But He knew that His Heavenly Father loved Him and that’s all that mattered to Him. He was here to do the will of His Father. He was going to do what He came to do for us with JOY, no matter what anyone thought of Him.
“Our worth is not based on what we do, which life path we choose, or what we believe [or how much we weigh or our size]. Our worth is inherent in the fact that we are image bearers of the living God. Our worth is based on the fact that we are alive. We are human beings. Our worth is immeasurable.”* Isn’t that awesome? He made us in His image. When He created you, He said, “Very good!” When I held my son for the very first time, there was this huge, unmeasurable love radiating from my heart for this sweet, little baby! And I know the Lord’s love for my son is even greater, even deeper, even wider. God is enamored by you! He is in deep, deep love with you!
“The only reflection that really matters is the reflection we see in his loving and joyous eyes.”* Look into His Word and see what He says about you!
“How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful!” Song of Solomon 4:1a
“Let me hear your voice;for your voice is sweet and your face is lovely.” Song of Solomon 2:14
“I have learned that being beautiful, feeling lovely, and enjoying who we uniquely are have absolutely nothing to do with our weight, our age, or the shape of our bodies”* Amen!!
“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands,like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.” 1 Peter 3:3-6
“Being beautiful is a quality of spirit recognized primarily in a woman whose soul is at rest because she believes her God when he calls her lovely She is no longer striving to reach the world’s unattainable standards of beauty and acceptance but instead is receiving the inheritance that is hers as an image bearer of the living God. She is embracing who God has made her to be.”*
Do believe you are lovely? Are you embracing who God has made you to be?
“Jesus is the only one who can meet the deepest needs of your heart, and he wants you to know how deeply he loves you so badly that he’s moved heaven and earth to do it. He is the only one who will never disappoint you, never ever leave you, comfort you intimately, and love you perfectly every single moment of your life. Invite him in.”*
I will disappoint my son at times. Even though I love him SO MUCH and I delight in him, I won’t be the perfect mother (even at my best). But that doesn’t mean he’s not worthy of love. God is the only perfect parent. People will disappoint us. But God will never disappoint us.
God loves you unconditionally. He accepts you. He will never disappoint you. He says you are beautiful, you are worth it, and you are loved.
How about you? Have you felt rejected by people in your life? Are you ready to embrace the One true Love and all He has to offer you? Spend time in His Word, ask Him what He says about you, what He thinks about you. You can get started by looking up these verses: Psalm 139 and Psalm 18.
*Becoming Myself: Embracing God’s Dream of You by Stasi Eldredge
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