7 Phrases To Ditch For Victory!

Image Source: Morgue File

Image Source: Morgue File

“It’s just a little snack!”

“I am going to eat healthy today!”

“Oh…if I get the house clean, I will have a little treat.”

“I am swearing off of all junk food.”

Food phrases come in all shapes and sizes, but I have discovered that certain words and phrases can be “little foxes” spoiling the “vineyard” in my eating life!

“Snack” – In the past, I, like many other people, would use the word “snack” to mean “free” eating—an “eating occasion” that doesn’t count. 🙂 It didn’t matter if I was hungry or not (or so the reasoning went) because it was “just a little taste of something.” While it probably wasn’t really a “sit down meal,” these “feedings” (as my naturally thin sister refers to them)  count! Now, I prefer not to use the word “snack” at all because it carries years of meaning from my dieting background. If I DO refer to a “snack,” it typically means sitting down and enjoying a smaller portion of anything when I am at a 0 and just shaving off my hunger—not eating all the way to a 5…like stopping at a “2” or “3” on the hunger scale. True Thin Within “snacking” happens only at a 0 and it does, indeed, “count!” I know this isn’t a “fun” revelation. 🙂

I find it most helpful if I consider every single time food crosses my lips as a “meal.” With Thin Within we come to realize we don’t need that much food to sustain our very efficient bodies. So, if every time food crosses my lips I think of it as a meal (or “feeding”), I am more likely to use more discernment about what I choose. This is a basic boundary for us. (I can see you cringe…But where has NOT having this boundary really gotten us?)  In the past, the quantity of food that I now consider a “meal” might have been called a “snack.” This is another reason why I don’t use the word “snack” much any more.

Think About It: If you have been doing Thin Within very long, consider the size of your portions and how they have changed. Is it possible that what you now consider an appropriate-sized meal you might have formerly called “just a snack?” How might this continue to change over time as you refine your hunger numbers?

“Junk Food” –  It is popular to believe that some foods are “junk.”  When we think of certain foods as “junk” it usually means we have declared those foods as “bad.” While it is true some food choices are better than others to feed my “perfect 0,”  when I call something “junk,” I imply that the food is the culprit to my weight and eating issues. The truth is, *I* am the culprit with the way, the why, the when, of my eating. Food is not immoral in any way. It is not the culprit in my eating challenges.  Instead of thinking of food as “junk food” (or not), I prefer to categorize foods the way that Thin Within speaks of in the second (Discernment) phase, as “teasers,” “pleasers,” “whole-body pleasers,” and “total rejects.” If I like the way a food tastes, but I feel lethargic after eating it, it might be a total reject or it may be a “teaser.” But I try not to think of it as “junk food.” The problem is typically more with ME and what I will DO with those foods than it is with the foods. (Even with a food that has no nutritional value, I find it helps me to just call it a total reject.)

Think About It: Are you like me? Needing to take responsibility for your eating instead of laying blame with the food? I have found that when I refer to foods as “junk” I beat myself up for eating them…which just sends me into a downward spiral. By referring to them, instead, as “total rejects” or “teasers,” I remind myself how *I* respond to them is what matters.

“Treat” – Ever notice that the foods that are in the “junk food” category are also often those referred to as “treats” as well? Calling something a “treat” sets up whatever-food-it-is as desirable to me. I end up seeing it as a reward. Do I really want to call food a “reward?” If I do that, it definitely lures me to eat outside of 0 and 5 whenever I am deserving of a “reward” and we know that I am always deserving of a reward (supposedly)! If I am happy, I deserve a reward. If I am sad, I deserve a reward. If I worked hard, I deserve a reward. If I run errands, I deserve a reward. If I stay home and vacuum, I deserve a reward.  What if we think, instead, of things like “Time alone reading a good book,” or “A long hot bath” as rewards? Consider non-food blessings. 🙂 If I think of food as “treats” then those foods are in my mind as something I get when I am “good.” This sets me up for failure.

Think About It: What are some other non-food ways you can “treat” yourself? Is there any chance that viewing some foods as “treats” is hindering your victory? Do you find that some of the foods that you may have considered “junk food” are the very foods you have also considered “treats?”

“Healthy Eating – What IS “healthy eating?” It is most helpful to me to consider it “Living within God’s parameters.” Or eating according to physical need (empty) and physical satisfaction. Eating whole-body pleasers when my body needs food is my idea of “healthy eating.”  It is important to note that my whole-body pleasers may be different from everyone else’s! This is NOT a one-size-fits-all approach! Healthy eating isn’t about which foods, but why (because of physical need) and when (when I am hungry). To think of “healthy eating” this way is definitely not the norm. Usually when we think of “healthy eating” we think of people who eat fruits, veggies, and lean meat and it isn’t about being hungry or not. I have known people who do not “eat healthy” even when they choose foods that seem more nutritionally dense. They still over-eat and don’t have a healthy relationship with food. Maybe you know some whole food connoisseurs or vegans who struggle with their weight just like others who eat primarily “junk food.” This really isn’t about the food, but about why we eat.

Think About It: What does healthy eating really look like for you? Is it what you choose to eat? Or is it when (hungry)? Or how much (enough to satisfy only)? Or a combination? What if you were to select only fruits and vegetables and lean meats, but eat for emotional reasons without regard to physical cues–would that be “eating healthy?” If you grab for the pita crisps instead of the Oreos when you just had a fight with your daughter is that “Healthy Eating?”

“Healthy Food” – This is like the other phrases that describe food, like “treat” or “junk food.” The problem with “healthy food” is it, again, seems to indicate that if I fix the food, then it is good to eat it…even if I don’t NEED food at that time. Sure, some foods are more nutritionally dense…more nutrition “bang” for energy “buck” and other foods are more “energy dense”…a lot less nutrition for the amount of energy consumed. But food is really inert, neutral, amoral. It isn’t the food that is healthy so much as how I relate to it. Is it  “healthy” to eat a large salad when I am not hungry? I guess every person has to make this decision for herself, but the answer for me as a faithful Thin Within participant and veteran…NO. Eating anything when I don’t need to eat it isn’t healthy. It becomes recreational eating again! Categorizing foods into “healthy food” and “junk food” keeps me from owning my need to scrutinize the why and when of my eating choices. I have found it much more helpful to consider foods as teasers, pleasers, whole-body pleasers and total rejects for the reasons I shared above. I also have found that if I set up a category of “healthy food,” then if I want to be “healthy” I end up trying to force myself to enjoy those foods. While I am all for expanding our culinary horizons and venturing out into new tastes and textures, if I don’t like something and eat it just because it is a “healthy food” then I am setting myself up for a fall.

Think About It: What are whole-body pleaser foods or meals for you? Would it be helpful to you and support your godly goals to consider food this way instead of “healthy food?”  Or as “beneficial foods?” I am not advising not to care about nutritional value, certainly, but giving an eye to nutrition and an eye to how foods make you feel might help you not try to force yourself to eat only foods that have certain nutritional content…so often that backfires! Or is that just me? 🙂

“Sort of Hungry” –  Hunger/satisfied signals exist on a continuum. But I try to stay away from speaking about being “sort of hungry,” because I have found that if I do this, it “sort of” justifies “sort of” eating! 🙂  In fact, there are even times when I need to strip the hunger scale back to simple terms: “Hungry” or “NOT Hungry.” If you are experiencing limited success with your 0 to 5 eating, consider if you are possibly pre-empting “hungry” by entertaining the idea that being “sort of hungry” justifies eating.

Think About It: Do you find yourself eating when you are “sort of hungry” or “a little bit hungry?” Is that working for you? If you are not seeing the physical results you think you should be seeing, maybe honing in on a true zero … completely empty… will be helpful.

“Kind of Full” – If I am “Kind of Full,” that means that I think I “still have room” for more food. Maybe I need to see if my body is satisfied with less food, rather than if I can get away with more! (If you have a history of restricting, I am not speaking to you. Please know that God wants you to eat what you NEED to sustain good health!) Again, for me personally, it has helped to go to “bare bones” with my terminology with the hunger scale. Instead of looking at “AM I at a 5? Or is this only a 4 and I still have room for more food?” I need to look at “HUNGRY” or “NOT Hungry.” “Kind of Full” is definitely in the “Not Hungry” category.  If I am NOT HUNGRY it is time to stop eating. Getting rid of  “Kind of Full” helps me be faithful to the boundaries that God has set for me.

Think About It: Do you push to see how much food you can eat before you have pushed too far? Or are you happy with eating until you know you are not hungry any more and call it good? Again, if you are not seeing the physical results that you think you should be seeing, you may want to evaluate this. One strategy that has been helpful for me (when I do it!) is to have a boundary of always leaving some (even just a bite or two) of food on my plate. Sometimes, this gets fed to the family dog, but I find that it helps to cure me of my tendency to be greedy! (But builds bad begging habits in my dog!)

How About You?

Are you willing to eliminate these words or phrases from your vocabulary to see if that might help you move closer to the victory that you desire? What other words or phrases do you find might be like “little foxes,” hindering your realization of the victory that you know is yours?

Follow Up – “Set the Timer!” Challenge

watchtimer

Image Source: Stock Exchange

Last week I posted a “Set the Timer Challenge.” If you missed it or need to review what that was about, have a look at this post.

How did it go for you?

  • I know some of you joined us late…no problem there. I would still love to follow up with you.

  • Some of you may not have tried it yet. You can today, if you like.  🙂

  • Some of you extended the challenge and may still be enjoying it.

So please use this space to tell us how it has gone for you! What truths did you use to renew your mind? What did you do when your timer went off? What about when you were with people and your timer sounded? Did that happen to you? What did you do about it? How has this challenge affected your intimacy with God? How has it affected your eating? Has it changed you in some way? How? Would you recommend it for others? Are you going to do it again?

What else can you tell us to share the encouragement!

If you have questions that you would like help with in order to do the challenge, feel free to post that, too.

What About You?

This entire post is all about you today! Share, won’t you? 🙂

How Did the Fire the Desire 3 Day Challenge Go?

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Hey, all. I wanted to offer a place here for you to report in how you did on the Fire the Desire 3-Day Challenge. Did you make it through the three days? What did you learn during the experience? About yourself? About God? About how it feels to follow your boundaries? About observation and correction? What’s next for you?

Let’s hear from you!

What to do when you mess up…

Grazing...nom nom nom...

Grazing…nom nom nom…

Last week, I created the Fire the Desire 3-Day Challenge form (did you download it on Tuesday?) in response to a request from one of my coaching clients that we “shake things up” to stimulate a change. I wanted to partner along with her, so I decided to take the challenge myself. Silly me. The first day I had stars in every box. WOOT! WOOT! YAY! I had an early breakfast 0 to 5 on the second day…off to a rousing start. Then, my daughter, recently returned from her first international trip, announced her desire to go to IN-n-Out. Hubby, Michaela and I headed off and, since I wasn’t hungry, I just got a diet soda. How about that! I would guess that was about when pride set in.

Next, I persevered through some tennis drills with hubby, still sustained by my breakfast. But after that? Well, I have no idea what happened. Something…I think when I got home I started “grazing” maybe because nothing sounded really good even though I was hungry (or was I?). So suddenly, my Fire the Desire 3-Day Challenge form had a big circle for one of the hours instead of a star! GASP!!!

THIS WAS NOT OK WITH ME! (Perfectionism rears its ugly head…it is not our friend!)

So, I did the mature thing…I crumpled it up (a tantrum, basically) and threw it in the trash. I printed out another chart so I could pretend to be perfect after all.

STOP!

Please tell me you won’t do this (or haven’t done this)!!!

And if you aren’t doing the challenge, I know you can relate even generally to applying yourself to eating 0 to 5, right?

Here is what I propose: If we have an hour when we feel hard pressed to put our star or favorite mark in the box (or experience victory if you aren’t doing the challenge with the chart), let’s circle the box, sure. Then, in the space below the grid, jot down an observation and correction. Prayerfully answer these questions: What happened to cause me to eat outside of my boundaries of 0 and 5 (or to drink sweetened beverages or not to have time praising the Lord at all during the day, etc)? What can I do differently next time so I won’t give in to whatever it was that got me during this hour?

Once you have answered these questions, you can consider the hour that is circled on your grid (or the choice you made to “mess up”) REDEEMED! You have allowed God to take your misstep (or, if you want to be really hard on yourself, a “failure”) and turn it into a victory where you have learned something to do differently when a similar situation presents itself the next time. THAT is a victory! This is what the Hallidays mean when they say failure can be a teacher, a coach, rather than your undertaker.

So, don’t do what I did and act like none of those starred boxes matter just because one of them didn’t have a star in it. Don’t assume that all the time you have made choices to honor God and to stay within your boundaries don’t matter just because of a mess up! Instead, observe and correct and praise God for the opportunity to learn.

In fact, let’s celebrate those boxes with stars in them. Let’s rejoice over the many moments we have made God-honoring choices!

But, of course, let’s have godly balance here…if you have more boxes that are circled than you do ones with stars in them, there is a problem–you may not be committed. But one hour out of 24–an hour where you were willing to observe (confess) and correct (repent) and make a plan for next time doesn’t a rotten day make!

How About You?

How are you doing on the challenge? Sure, you can start over from scratch if you want to, but why not observe and correct and press on now? This is the way life is. It is rarely perfect!

What is Your Commitment Level?

Image Source: iStockPhoto

Image Source: iStockPhoto

When I was a young girl, if a boy had my heart, I would write his initials and mine inside a heart. Putting this declaration on the front of my school folder or book-cover (made with a brown paper grocery sack) seemed to somehow make my intentions more intense–more true–more powerful.

I have never had my initials carved on a tree trunk that I know of, or a marriage proposal engraved on a tree trunk, though twice I have been proposed to by water–once by the river (by the man I married) and once at the California coast (by the man I didn’t). Both men knew that I wouldn’t take favorably to carving the proposal into a tree trunk (unless the tree was already dead), I suppose! LOL!

Though now, I suppose I might look at the declaration of love as more intense, more meaningful, more powerful had it been carved into a stately oak or poplar tree. True confessions! It certainly would stand as a monument to refer back to later in the marriage, wouldn’t it? A great way to remember youthful longing and dreams for what could be. Sigh! 🙂

I want to urge you again…evaluate if eating 0 to 5 is something that God is calling you to do and then if you are convinced–convicted–in your heart that it is, jot that truth down and then date it so you have it as a touchstone, a point of reference, to return to when you waver. It is a declaration of your intent!

Barb Raveling has asked a challenging question at her blog and, today, I ask you: “What is Your Commitment Level?”

Are you committed to this for now…are you “trying on” 0 to 5 eating and, as long as it feels good, you might keep at it?

Are you not quite even to that point yet, but only just now considering trying 0 to 5 eating?

Are you pretty committed–as long as it doesn’t take any more work than sticking with a diet?

Or are you committed as long as the scale shows results right away and every day?

Are you committed to 0 to 5 eating because of some deeper reason than weight loss? Maybe because you are sure God is calling you to moderation and you know this is the path he has for you no matter what?

Are you committed so that even when you fall off the horse you are going to get back on again–for the rest of your days on this planet?

As you can well imagine, the willingness to work at 0 to 5 eating will vary depending on the commitment level and that commitment level may be affected by if you are sure God has called you to it and what your commitment level to God is!

Several people who are convinced that this is God’s call for them have shared with me that they consider the commitment to 0 to 5 eating similar to the commitment in their marriage–they know that it won’t always be easy. In fact, sometimes, it might be downright UG-LEEEEE! They know that at times they may want to just throw in the towel as that would be easier. But they also know they just will never quit. Period. End of conversation. It is a non-negotiable.

While it is definitely possible to “over spiritualize” everything in our lives, including our eating and use of food, I also think that when you look at significant events in history in the bible and how many of them had food as a pivotal part of the scene, it certainly seems to be something that God values. We need look no further than the third chapter of Genesis before we see that a lack of commitment to godly boundaries relative to food had dire consequence!

Thoughts for Consideration:

1. How about you? Have you sensed the 0 to 5 eating is something that God has called you to? Jot it some place that you can record it with the date. If it helps, draw a big ol’ ink heart around it! 🙂

2. What is your commitment level to 0 to 5 eating? Refer to one of the options mentioned above or come up with your own and jot it down. Evaluate if you are happy with your commitment level or if you want to “woo” a greater commitment to moderation in all things relative to eating. Journal about this.

3. If you want to “woo” a greater commitment to 0 to 5 eating, you might consider creating a truth card (or a list) of all the benefits of 0 to 5 eating. On another truth card, you can list truths about dieting (don’t forget the truth that dieting DOES work to help lose weight, but include the other truths, too!). Another card, you could list truths about eating whatever you want, whenever you want, in the quantities you want. Give these lists of truths some careful, prayerful consideration.

4. You may need to go even deeper. Commitment to anything is pretty empty if a commitment to God is weak. Where do you stand relative to your relationship with Jesus? Are you willing to go wherever he calls you?