I have been on my Thin Within journey for almost 3 years now. As I talked about before, this journey has been more about the mental “weight” than the physical weight. I can see now that a lot of what fueled my issues and packed on that “weight” was that I thought I had to be a certain size and have a “perfect” physique. I wanted to look like the images I was seeing plastered all over social media, fitness magazines, and to look like those fitness gurus. I thought I could not be pleased with my body as is if I didn’t fit a certain mold. I felt that I could not settle or be satisfied until “skinny” was won. But wow, I really had it all wrong. I wanted to share some things with you about how the Lord has me tasting freedom and how He recently opened my eyes.
I talked before about not being on Facebook because it was something that would fuel the skinny idol worship. For most of 2015, I was not on Facebook. Due to some recent circumstances, I activated my Facebook account and tried to steer clear of the diet talk. It’s not an easy thing for me to do. So you can imagine my surprise when something on Facebook was a tool the Lord used to get my attention. It came from an “Intuitive Eating” page I follow and I believe it was this image that caught my attention:
It got my attention because I have struggled…really struggled with thinking that I needed to follow a diet like Paleo. It was really bothering me…still… And then I watched this video that debunks the message behind Paleo. (If the Paleo diet is something you struggle with, it’s a great 20-minute video).
And the Lord used that video to set me free about what I had been believing. Now, if you enjoy eating that way, totally go for it. But for me, personally, it would be a diet. It would have me right back to “touch not, taste not”. And that would not bring me peace. I have to follow God’s peace. So (disclaimer), if you are reading this and God has given you discernment to eat or not to eat certain foods, follow HIS peace in that. I’m just sharing that this was something that was tripping me up–it was a HUGE stumbling-block for me.
And then the Lord, through another Facebook page about ditching the diets and accepting our bodies, started showing me this clear message that I have allowed the world, the media, the fitness and diet industry tell me that I’m not enough being the size that I am. The posts that are shared encouraged me so much and God’s truth poured into me and I saw so many lies just melt away. Never would I had thought a Facebook page could do such a thing. These are just some of the messages that spoke to me:
All of a sudden it’s like I realize that being “healthy” and taking care of my body doesn’t haven’t to be obsessive. And when I eat and exercise 0-5, I will be at the body size and weight God designed especially for me. It’s like I finally realized that I can be content in that. I no longer want my goal to be that “image”. My goal is to eat and exercise 0-5 and to accept my body as is. This is a HUGE revelation for me (just ask my accountability partner–and my husband). I feel like I now have the courage to say, “This is my body! God has blessed me with my body and I’m going to take care of it for Him!”
I feel like I’ve been given the courage to love and accept my body. Praise God!
I really liked this (above). I printed it and taped it to my bathroom vanity. (I made the little change to it)
I have spent so many years trying to achieve “the perfect body”. The enemy was always right there whispering to me that I wasn’t enough–no matter how much weight I lost or how fit my body was. And now I see that was all a bunch of lies, lies, LIES! I was totally fine! I can love and accept my body right where it’s at (even at almost 38 weeks pregnant, as I am writing this). I’m so excited!! I want to love my body and take care of it as God’s temple. I am not a number on a scale. And just because I don’t look like the Photoshopped images doesn’t mean I’m less of a child of God, or less beautiful, or not healthy, or even fit. I am DONE comparing myself to this world. I’m done trying to conform to the pattern of this world. I can be healthy at the size God has designed my body to be. He didn’t design me to be this obsessed, tracking, counting, measuring, self-absorbed, addicted person.
I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. (Romans 12:1-2)
I don’t know where you are in your journey. It took me 3 years to get to this place of tasting freedom. But don’t let that length of time discourage you. That may seem like a long time, but every moment matters, every day matters. It took many hours and journals of renewing my mind and prayer to honestly be able to say that I can love and accept my body–but here I am! All praise, honor, and glory goes to the Lord! So keep pressing in! Eating and exercising 0-5 works! God’s design for you is perfect! You are beautiful! And you are wonderfully made!