As my new Thin Within class rapidly approaches I find myself struggling once again with the progress, or lack thereof, I’ve made thus far on my journey. I’m referring to my physical progress. I truly wanted the ladies to see the tremendousus loss of weight that has occurred before they joined me on this Thin Within journey. Unfortunately, they won’t. And that is something I have to accept. The enemy would love nothing more than to use this to discourage me and launch mental assaults that tell me I’m not qualified to lead others.
Isn’t it funny the expectations we set for ourselves when God calls us to do something for his Kingdom. We assume we will have “arrived” by the time he has us stand before others and introduce them to the journey toward freedom we’ve been walking, for example. What’s even more uncanny is the fact that people want to know they are accepted right where they are. For that matter, we want to know we’re accepted right where we are. In fact, some, those who may need this teaching most, might even feel intimated if they were to see that I was skinny. My point is not that God doesn’t want me at my God-given size. My point is that he can use me every step of the way, before, during and/or after. It’s up to him. However, we each have a “before place” in the testimony of our lives that God is writing. And we need others who are at different points on the path to help encourage us to stay the course.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (The Advantages of Companionship) says, “Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. “ The bottom line is we need each other regardless of where we are currently standing on the path to freedom. And people need to know it’s okay. As long as we are moving in a forward direction, listening to the Lord, and obeying his commands, we cannot help but serve as an encouragement to others and them to us.
Recently, I reconnected with a childhood friend I’ve searched for over the past several years. As I was documenting some of the major things that have happened in my life since we last spoke, I simply had to marvel at all I’ve come through. Compared to many they wouldn’t be considered eventful or even painful necessarily, but for me they tenderized my heart and certainly could have been much worse had the Lord not stepped in and redirected my path. The reason I’ve searched for her so fervently these past several years is because I owed her an apology. An apology for blowing off her friendship so many times when she reached out to me. Unfortunately, it was in a season when I was a workaholic and paid little attention to relationships.
It’s funny the multitude of emotions that come at us each day and tempt us to eat outside the boundaries God’s set for us. And I’m no exception. As I’ve begun to reconnect with my friend I’ve begun to revisit that season in my life when I was terribly productive but lacked in deep friendships. It’s just this kind of mental and emotional process that can take us one direction or another … into the arms of Jesus … or into the kitchen. I have to recognize that each moment during this process that I’ve turned to Jesus and not to food I’ve made the kind of progress that matters. And it’s this kind of process that these women who are signed up for my class need to know about.
Once again as I sit to write this blog I’m overwhelmed at the kindness of the Lord. Not a day passes that I don’t rejoice at all he’s done to hold me steady and draw my heart toward his. I shudder to think what battle I might be fighting if it weren’t my weight.
What about you? What are you walking through right now? Is it drawing you to Jesus or the refrigerator? Do you realize the kindness of the Lord in the testimony he’s writing with your life? Be encouraged at where you stand in the journey today. As Joyce Meyer says, “I’m not where I want to be, but thank God I’m not where I use to be.”