Written By Cathie Rosemann
This past weekend was intended to be a great getaway with a dear girlfriend shopping at an area Trade Days, relaxing at a recommended B&B, eating food we don’t normally enjoy, and just catching up. This is an annual event to celebrate our birthdays. However, this year would be different with regard to my eating. So, I strategized with Heidi as to my battle plan for the weekend, and sought to prepare my heart before we took off on Saturday morning.
The morning drive went well and when I was offered warm, yummy-smelling muffins I enjoyed a couple as I was just approaching a 0 and knew we wouldn’t eat again until lunchtime. However, upon entry into the Trade Days we passed a vendor who was making corn dogs and funnel cakes and my friend said we had to get some. I half mindlessly agreed, justifying to myself that we would walk off the calories (old mindset) and likely wouldn’t eat again until late in the day. Nope. A few hours later and still not hungry we passed a vendor making homemade fried green tomatoes and ranch dressing and we agreed to try them out. They were delicious, and while I didn’t eat to a 5 I didn’t start at a 0 either. The next day wasn’t much better because we still had the delicious breakfast to enjoy before checking out of the B&B … yet I still wasn’t at a 0. Did that stop me? No it didn’t. Again, I never did eat past 4-5, but I didn’t start from a place of 0 either. In other words, I was in full violation of the God-given boundaries that I’d armed myself with. Even sadder is the fact that I rose early, before the other B&B guests on Sunday morning and repented before the Lord rearming myself with truth for the coming day. He of course, was faithfully waiting for me when I arrived in my bath rope and slippers. He gently reminded me of something I’d read in the “Hunger Within” book (pg. 47), “God gives us the freedom to observe and correct, to fail and succeed … And when we fail, God is always there to pick us up. He will continue walking with us until we have our ultimate freedom …” How sweet is that!
So what happened? How could I be so confident and prepared going into the weekend, and yet so quickly violate my boundaries? I was determined to find out (observe & correct). And so bright and early Monday morning the Lord again was waiting to visit with me over my morning coffee before the hustle and bustle of another day would hit. And he showed me two primary reasons for my failure. The first was that I stopped paying attention. I got so excited about the glorious weather, all the fun stuff for sale, and the yummy food I was “permitted” to eat that I neglected to pay attention to the faithful promptings of the Holy Spirit. Bottom line, the weekend became “all about me” and little about Him. My focus turned inward. Second, I was more interested in people-pleasing my girlfriend than I was pleasing the Lord. In fact, when I apologized to my friend for being such a poor influence on our eating she responded by telling me that she would have eaten what she wanted regardless of what I did. So my people-pleasing backfired on me all the way around! Oh my, that was a tough one to swallow when the Lord brought that to my attention. I was reminded of Genesis 39:9 where Joseph is confronted with pleasing himself and Potiphar’s wife or pleasing the Lord by honoring Potiphar’s (Joseph’s master) authority. He chose pleasing the Lord.
What about you? Have you ever started out full of momentum to succeed using the Thin Within tools in a potentially challenging situation but ended up failing at the outset? Did you take the time to meet with the Lord and ask Him why this was/is? If not, learn from me. He is waiting for that one-on-one time together so He can share the truth with you. And it’s never too late to spend that time with Him, especially if it means learning something about ourselves.