I want to be honest. If you don’t like honest, you won’t like this post. *I* probably won’t like this post when I am done.

I am sick of myself and my excuses. Do you ever feel this way?

Some thoughts have struck me.

If I don’t “like” the Thin Within book, I can join the crowd. After all, who likes to be told that God cares about what I eat and that He wants me to eat less food? Who likes to be told that I need to “observe and correct,” or confess and repent when I just simply want to EAT? Who wants to think that what I eat somehow is a reflection of my walk with God and whether or not I am allowing Him to meet my needs?

Who likes the fact that I have a stomach the size of a fist and when I put more than that tiny bit of food in it I just WANT more? Who wants to be told this stuff? Not many of us like it. Frankly, right now, I don’t like it.

So if I have a problem with what is in the Thin Within book, I am in good company. In fact, I can get my shorts in a bunch about it! I wonder if you know the feeling…

But that doesn’t mean the message of the book isn’t true. It just means…I don’t like it.

Yes, I can come up with a million reasons to reject the message in the book…

–> I was abused at mealtime as a child…
–> I have an autistic son and it is soooooooooooooooooo stressful….
–> If God meant for me to eat so little why did he make food taste so good?

Or how about:
–> “It isn’t realistic to eat this way.”
–> ” I am a teacher and the schedule tells me when to eat.” (It is easy to disregard the fact that many teachers have figured out how to eat this way by planning their hunger).
–>”I have health problems.” or “I think I have health problems–I NEED more food!” (Why do we think that no matter what the trouble or problem is, food will solve it? Half the time, eating too much food has caused or contributed to the problem!!!)
–>”I have medications that I have to take with food…and a full meal is in order so I won’t get nauseous!” (It actually only takes a cracker or two …ask the doctor!)
–> “I take medications that change my hunger signals!” (Most of the time this means we don’t get to a 0 as often as we *want* to…the fact is, if we wait for 0 and eat, we just don’t get to eat as much food as we want…)
–>”I have high blood sugar, low blood sugar, high blood pressure, low thyroid…” the list goes on. That may all be true, but if God has allowed it in my life, it certainly isn’t His intention that it be used to justify gluttony or eating more than my body needs!

I am at a point of honesty with myself tonight. Want to join me?

Most of the time…gosh…it just boils down to this… I WANT TO EAT BECAUSE I WANT IT.

Food tastes good and I want it.

I want to justify eating it. I want it.

I don’t like eating less. I want it.

I am ready to be honest. I am going to quit griping about the book, my son, my neurotic dog, my spirited horse that scares me, my stressful life, my uncooperative body, and, even…GOD! I am going to QUIT MY GRIPING!

The bottom line is I WANT IT!!!! I want more FOOD! I want to eat!

I am sick of my own attitudes and excuses. Are you sick of yours?

So what will I do with this truth? Will I get mad? Will I eat in response to this declaration? Or will I choose to recognize that there may be some truth to this? What will I do with the truth?