LOL! Not a very clever title for a blog post…actually, the truth is, life is exciting! God has been up to some big things and I am thrilled about it!
I have been enjoying long leisurely quiet times in the early morning–part of the time I used to spend blogging. Now I am spending it with Him lingering a bit longer. I have needed this because spiritual warfare has definitely increased. I know God is up to some big things–in my life, but also in the life of my church body. He has laid on my heart to pray and encourage some folks and I think the enemy is stinking mad! This has resulted in less time online in the mornings, but it is a good thing.
So, if you are wondering if I have “thrown in the towel” or have “given up” … NO! Nothing could be further from the truth! In fact, I continue to rejoice that this is SO totally different than any time in my past when I have “lost” weight…and then “found” some again. THIS is DIFFERENT! I rejoice!
On a practical note, I have begun to really step up scrutinizing my eating between 0 and 5. There have been some adjustments made there.
The new experiment is yet ahead. I am praying about a few things relative to my health and wholeness:
1.) Exercise…what kind of exercise will be incorporated into my life? Does God want me to be routine about this? I have returned to riding my horses again and I typically do some walking when I go on a ride (my riding horses are in their 20s and we live in hilly terrain, so getting off for some of the hills is my gift to all of us!). I do tend to have some *fears* associated with an exercise routine and whether God wants me to have a regular exercise routine or not, I don’t know, but I DO know he wants me to deal with the fear. And I want my body, His temple, to be fit–no matter my size.
2.) Working with my Doc horse who has been for sale. I think God may be leading me to continue my healing journey by being intentional about working with Doc. God hasn’t opened the door for Doc to leave to live with another family permanently. So I think it could be his purpose with me isn’t finished. God uses my animals in my life to teach me so many things. When I work with Doc many of my “issues” surface and I tend to shut down–almost disassociate. This keeps me from being present to help Doc *or* me! I have assumed that I should find a new home for Doc so he can have a human who can give him what he needs, but perhaps the Lord wants to continue my healing by helping me get through this…so…we will see…Definitely praying about it.
3.) I am going through The Search for Significance again, but this time with my accountability partner. I am excited about this! (I still have notes from Get Thin Stay Thin that I want to post here at the blog, so I get ahead of myself, of course!). God continues to remove one layer of the onion after the other. It is amazing how much is here. I continue to prayerfully walk through this: Lord, please show me what strongholds other than you remain in my life…I want to tear them down by your power!
Related to all of the above is something I have to share about my Harley horse. Harley and I have had a tumultuous relationship. Like the others, I got him 6 years ago when I fell head over heals in love. My relationship with Harley is definitely different from the others. 🙂 Harley is like the horse I dreamed all my life of having…
Breezy is Old Reliable (the white horse to the right–did you know Jesus will ride a white horse one day? Breezy is convinced it will be him! LOL!). Breezy is my faithful steed to ride when I just want to go on a joy ride and see the wonders of God’s creation or visit with a friend.
Doc (pictured in the first photo where I am riding him) is more of my “baby” horse…I’ve had to nurse-maid him for one thing or another all his life with me (6 years).
Harley (pictured down below), on the other hand, is like a mad, passionate love affair! 🙂 He makes the blood in my veins run hot and I adore him…I adore them all, but this is different. He is solicitous and interacts with me. We communicate with one another (no, I don’t mean in voices…but it is obvious we have many “discussions” when we are together!).
I also have the most depending on or “riding on” my relationship with him, having put SO much pressure on myself and on him to “succeed.” God is using him to show me that I have placed far too much importance on accomplishing things with Harley for my sense of value and significance. It seems so silly, really. But it is true!
So, lately, the principles from Get Thin Stay Thin and The Search for Significance have come home in my horsemanship! I realize that I am the same person when I end my horse time as I am when I begin it–that because of the love of God and Christ’s redemption I am a person of great worth, I am redeemed and precious in his sight, I am fully accepted and loved. It isn’t my horsemanship that determines my value (I know this is obvious) just as it isn’t my being at a certain weight and staying there that makes me have value or “success.” It is GOD ALONE who defines my worth and value….
This has been coming home in such a fresh way. And my times with Harley have been wonderful–I think partly because the self-imposed pressure is off! Harley is so sensitive to me and how I feel (I mean almost eerily so…) that I know he senses this change as well and is responding well to it.
Anyhow, I am HUMMING along…God is walking with me and I with him…and the fellowship is SWEET!
I hope to take some time daily to put my notes about the final chapters if Get Thin Stay Thin here at the blog. The stuff in that book has changed my life so much! (You should see what has happened to my accountability partner! MAN ALIVE!!!!!! GOD IS AWESOME!!!)