Sometimes I can’t believe myself! Even as I diligently write sample chapters for my book proposal, and here at the blog about how awareness of God’s true attributes and praising him changes things–and it does!–I nevertheless so easily shift into the flesh. I suppose it makes sense that, after 40+ years of thinking one way, it won’t necessarily be a flip of a switch to make a change. But God has been working with me on this for a long while. Good grief!
So here is where I am. I feel like Paul in Romans 7–like there are two of me fighting. The result is I AM CRAZY! I am SO thankful that HE IS SUFFICIENT for even my insanity.
One of me focuses desperately on the Lord, blogs about him, his character and choosing to praise him. That is the person who rejoices in thanking him repeatedly throughout the day and when tempted to keep eating (and not hungry) says, “I have the Lord! I don’t need more food! I love HIM, He is trustworthy and loving! I don’t need food to satisfy me! I trust him!” (Yes, all said with exclamation points, exuberant hyperbole and superlatives!!!) As I do this, He changes me. He makes me new (again), He makes my choices new, my thoughts new. Focusing on HIM transforms ME. YAY! I was made for THIS! So were we all!
Then, suddenly, POOF! The other me is there and the “godly me” is gone. I may not notice this until I have spiraled into a different place–a darker place. It is the place of “Ugh! I never knew menopause would change me so much. How can I be so forgetful? What are those bulges on the sides of my hips and why am I carrying less weight worse than ever? And nuts…even my hunger signals are different. My hair is different! I look like a poodle! I hate this!” BAAAAAAH!!!!
Do you see what the focus of the shift is? ME! MY food, MY weight, MY “stage of life,” MY forgetfulness, MY hunger signals, MY [[gulp]] hair!
While all of this is true, certainly…that my body HAS changed and I know much of it is a result of hormonal shifts, what is UP with allowing it to draw my focus so intensely? When I do that, it doesn’t produce godly change at ALL. In fact, it makes me like the lady with the colander on her head. 🙂
When I CHOOSE to know God more and CHOOSE to praise him, I know that I choose something that changes me. It may not seem permanent, but it is an eternal investment!
For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us
an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.
So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen.
For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
~ 2 Corinthians 4:17-18
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