God never ceases to amaze me. What an incredible privilege. After hoping and praying (on and off) for SEVEN years (!!!) that I could be involved with women face-to-face (not only online) to walk through the Thin Within material, that is now happening! I am so thrilled!

Monday morning I had the joy of having my first meeting with a lady at my church who wants support going through the Thin Within book. I SO enjoyed her company and I delight that God has provided her in *my* life to offer added accountability and prayer support as well. We are using the little study guide that Pam Sneed and I put together some years back and that the Thin Within Company (thinwithin.org) now has available for the cost of printing. I already am really enjoying being a participant again! 🙂

Today, I read the introduction material in the book and the first day’s worth…the first chapter. Boy…it is soooo weird to be in this place…instead of starting reading trying not to be afraid to hope, I am at a weight I never dreamed of being…God has done so much in my physical body…I know that it has been him. (There is so much work yet to be done in my heart, though…it almost seems like it isn’t right…) I have been applying the principles of Thin Within pretty faithfully (generally) for 10 months now and released 80 pounds or so (a few more fell off while at horse camp…go figure…I am not convinced they will stay off…).

Today, I journaled as I read the first chapter of the book again and these thoughts came to my mind and heart:

I know my heart is still (again?) not fully surrendered. I have changed what I *demand* certainly. What I declare ever-so-subtly as “my rights” may not be quite the quantity they once were…but I still have a defective–no, let’s call it what it is…a SINFUL–heart attitude! It needs to be submitted to the Lord!

I see that I have wandered consistently from applying the Keys to Conscious Eating. While I am not restricted to a series of laws…the keys are helpful. I want to recommit to eating only when I am truly physiologically hungry. It is like I know what I can get away with to stay at this weight now…but what if God wants to remove more weight from me? Of course, the weight isn’t the point…I KNOW that he doesn’t want me to cling to the things I cling to (Oreos, for starters). I should cling only to him!!! But it is like I know what I can get away with and so I keep sneaking or something…

Another Key I need to apply is to eat more slowly…boy, I can still inhale food and when it is less food than it used to be, it is gone in nothing flat! I also need to savor each bite. I need to pay more attention to the food. This morning, I actually read EMAIL while eating! Good grief! I wonder if I have been doing that for long? When I was done, I realized I hadn’t given Daisy (my dog) the bites I usually do…and that meant I hadn’t been mentally present for my breakfast!

As I think ahead to leading the Thin Within class starting October 3, some things have really struck me. A big focus of Thin Within is to encourage the participant: 1.) To no longer be anxious about food or SELF and 2.) to learn to trust the body God has designed…that it is reliable for telling us when and what we need to eat and when to stop.

It occurred to me that these two things may seem pretty near impossible for some participants to imagine! It is really something to be looking at this material from a completely different place…I am so thankful that God has a wonderful way of making all things new…He is doing a new thing yet again…wow. Thank you Lord.

Lord, I desire to really be surrendered. Please do your work in me. In Christ Jesus’ Name, Amen.