I have become quite a fan of specialty coffee! Peppermint mochas, in particular. Iced or hot, both are at the very top of my list of “Ways to Pamper Myself.” Massages, manicures, facials, and pedicures are also on that list, too! I’m not sure which would be #1 – they are all favorites!
The Dutch Bros. barista had written “Happy Birthday” backwards with caramel syrup on the under side of the clear dome top!
(As you can see, I’m feeling pretty pampered!)
But as I look in the mirror – yes, lovingly and gently, yet honestly – and see my excess weight, my guess is that 20% of it has come from peppermint mochas.
(As an aside, I’d say another 20% has come from “just one more bite”! … Another 5% from Thanksgiving dinners. … Another 3% from cookie dough. … Another 10% from “seconds”… and on and on…)
Not every peppermint mocha has been problematic – only ones I imbibed outside of my 0-5 boundaries. But that’s most of them because, for a long time, I somehow (foolishly) thought that, just because they were liquid, they didn’t count!
So the Lord has been speaking to me recently about my relationship with peppermint mochas. OK, He’s been trying to speak to me about this for a long time, but I have not wanted to listen.
Our youngest daughter, Carlianne, and I at Starbucks! (As you can see, I am an equal opportunity peppermint mocha lover!)
When Christina Motley shared in one of her porch chats what the Lord spoke to her about her mother’s Chocolate Chip Bundt cake and all things chocolate chip, I knew it was time to listen to Him on this matter.
In Fresh Wind Fresh Desire, author Heidi Bylsma-Epperson talks about “lies,” “little-T truths,” and “big-T truths.” We all believe many lies and little-T truths that have completely messed up our thinking. Lies like “I’m doomed to be overweight forever because I simply cannot get control of my eating.”
This lie is actually interlaced with a “little-t truth” because this may very well be your experience thus far. However it’s a LIE that you are doomed to stay this way forever because God’s Big-T Truth is that “In Christ Jesus, ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE.”
Because our wrong thinking messes up our minds and keeps us bound to frustration, failure, and hopelessness, these lies and little-t truths must be exposed and recognized as being exactly what they are.
They cannot be allowed to stay locked into our belief system; no longer our “bottom line.” They must be replaced with God’s big-T truths! And this is what we call “renewing our mind.” We truly will be transformed by the renewing of our mind!
Heidi and Christina talk about making Truth Lists. In this article called Truth Lists for the Real-Life Journey I compiled several of the Truth Lists they have shared. And Christina’s truth list about chocolate chips is included in that article!
So I thought maybe I should do some serious truth journaling regarding my problematic peppermint mochas. Thinking there probably wasn’t really all that much to say about it, I decided to give it a try anyway. It’d just be a short but sweet exercise at best. But I was surprised at what poured out. (Pardon the pun!)
So let’s get going!
🤨Little-t Truth:Peppermint mochas make me feel special and valuable.
🤩 Big-T Truth:I am just as special and valuable without one.
🤨 Little-t Truth:Peppermint mochas are a tasty way of pampering myself, and I looooove being pampered.
🤩 Big-T Truth:Yes, but frequentpampering of myself does not need to be such a main goal of my life! As a follower of Christ, I am called to a life of self-denial. Not a life of continual pampering. I need to allow the Holy Spirit to comfort my spirit and nourish my soul so that I do not have such a great need to be pampered. I need to imbibe more in the Living Water: “The Lord lets me drink from His rivers of delight.”
🤨 Little-t Truth:Peppermint mochas make a plain, regular occasion – like driving somewhere – feel fun and special. They “spice it up.”
🤩 Big-T Truth:They do do this, but not without me paying a high price:like taking me outside of my 0-5 boundaries, which I believe the Lord has set for me, and which I need to follow whether I feel like it at the moment or not. I also believe that God has “made my boundaries to fall in pleasant places.” So I need to find fun and specialness INside my boundaries and OUTside of a peppermint mocha.
🤨 Little-t Truth:Peppermint mochas taste delicious, feel good going down, and are a fluid form of entertainment that lasts a while.
🤩Big-T Truth:True, but I pay a high price for this “entertainment”; it is not a form of entertainment that blesses my body if I have one when I am not at a zero, and/or drink too much of it. (beyond 5) Just because they are delicious and feel good going down doesn’t mean I need to indulge myself in that way every time I want to do so. They are part of what has gotten me too close to becoming pre-diabetic. (Which I have actually crossed over into a couple of times, but come back out.)
🤨Little-t Truth:If I am at a coffee shop getting gift cards for people, I feel like I deserve to get one of these to as a reward for myself for buying them for others!
🤩 Big-T Truth:Unless I have planned to be – and am – at a zero and it’s a good time to have one, I need to just focus on getting a gift for others – not for myself.
🤨Little-t Truth:When it’s hot outside, an iced peppermint mocha is a cool and refreshing way to cool off.
🤩 Big-T Truth:Other beverages or treats are also cool and refreshing and without such a high caloric content – unless I am truly at a zero and only drink up to a 5 (max).
🤨Little-t Truth:When it’s cold outside, a hot peppermint mocha is warm, soothing, and cozy.
🤩Big-T Truth:There are other drinks and activities that are warm, soothing, and cozy as well. Like spending time with the Lord! HE is the ultimate in warm (Jesus’ warm love), soothing (the Holy Spirit’s soothing presence), and cozy (“giving a feeling of comfort, warmth, relaxation and intimacy” – which is exactly what our Daddy-God longs to give us!
So does all this mean I don’t get to enjoy my favorite beverage anymore? Nope! It just means I need to be going to the Lord more regularly to get what I really need, what I’ve tried too often to get from my froo-froo drinks.
And then when I do have one, it needs to be within the parameters of my 0-5 eating boundaries. I have actually done this a few times now, and I have to tell you I enjoy my beverage sooooooo muuuuuch mooooore! Because it’s not only giving me enjoyment tastebud-wise, but, because I’m actually hungry, it tastes even better than normal.
Plus I’m staying true to myself and to my Lord ~ and nothing tastes better than that!!! As Heidi says:
If you’ve been connected with Thin Within for longer than ten minutes, you’ve heard Heidi and Christina talk about Truth Lists.
These can help you get a breakthrough in an area of your life that is currently tripping you up, keeping you bound, or bringing you confusion or downright misery.
A Truth List is an excellent tool for renewing your mind. In fact, I’d call it “mind renewing on steroids”! Or a “fast-track to a sound mind” in an area you know you’re not sound in! It can really pack a punch to any wrong thinking that’s currently holding you captive, ineffective, or stymied in a certain area.
There is no one best or right way to do a Truth List. You just want it to include truths that will help you view a real-life situation the way God views it — which is the only right way, because God’s way is the only way that will bring healing and wholeness! Nothing else can or will free us from our wrong thinking — thinking that can derail us, spiral us downward into sadness or depression, or take us in a wrong direction.
How to make one? Where to start? … Just with something —anything— that is currently bothering you, keeping you from walking in victory, joy, or freedom, or something that continually nags at you, robbing you of peace.
As you will see below, each Truth List is completely different. None of them followed any rules. Each has its own style and focus. Some are long, some are short.
Some were shared in our small coaching group, where I gathered them for this article, and one of them I transcribed from a porch chat by Christina.
I share these with you today in hopes that they will open up for you the wonderful world of creating a Truth List for a real-life aspect of your journey!
Truth List about My Weakened Physical Condition
by Heidi
What is true: I am not my activity level. I am not my energy level.
However, God’s truth about this is that…
🌷 I am a child of the king no matter what my energy level.
🌷 I am a princess bride.*
🌷 No matter how I feel physically, I am part of a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a person who belongs to God.
🌷 No matter what condition my body is in, I have been called out of darkness and into his marvelous light to declare his praises…
🌷 And that is who I am most fundamentally. No matter how I feel physically or what infection I may be fighting or what blood clot is in my body, if any, I have been purchased with the precious blood of Christ.
🌷 No matter what I look like or how emaciated my body may be, no matter how little muscle or how weak I am physically, I am the temple of the Holy Spirit.
*And, speaking of “princess bride,” I have a special treat for you!! Here is the beautiful Princess-Bride Heidi herself on her Wedding Day, with several of her Thin Within sisters! (From left to right: Emily Felts (featured in the next section), me / Barb Shelton, Christina Motley, Heidi Bylsma Epperson, Judy Halliday (founder of Thin Within!), Jan Tabrizi, and Karon Ruiz)
And here are Heidi and her handsome Prince-Groom, Michael Epperson! (Wedding Day: June 29,2019) Michael MADE the chocolate cake, which was amaaaazing!!!
Truth List about Restoration and Freedom
by Heidi, Emily, and Bridget
Heidi asked our small coaching group: “Please share the truths you have added (or could add) to your truth cards or truth list from Hunger Within chapter 2.”
The first ones with the pink flowers 🌸 are by Heidi; the next ones with the white flowers 🌼 are from Emily; and the last ones with the sunflowers 🌻 are from Bridget. Thank you, ladies, for sharing your contributions!
Heidi:
🌸 I CAN be healed and restored through God’s power.
🌸 I CAN be set free from disordered eating.
🌸 In my attempts to “manage” or “control” the impact food and eating has on me, I create entanglements that enslave me even more!
🌸 Fixed formulas of restraint and a constant fear of failing will never work.
🌸 Any formula that prevents failure also prevents freedom!
🌸 I need to develop new and appropriate coping techniques to replace the disordered behaviors of my past.
🌸 It is entirely possible that all of the changes that need to be made are so threatening to me that I will be tempted to back away from having my grave clothes unwrapped and keep the grave clothes bound around me. I may even want to flee back into the tomb and pull the stone over the entrance.
Emily Felts:
🌼 As I accept the challenge of freedom and resolve the pain hidden beneath my eating, I am free to enjoy a peaceful relationship with food and my body.
🌼 God’s gift to me is resurrection — restoration and recovery.
🌼 Recovery from disordered eating is not only possible; it is what God intends.
🌼 Today I present myself to Jesus, ready to have my grave clothes removed: to give voice to my hunger within, and — in His presence — to listen to myself, body, mind, and soul.
🌼 God is in control of this process and he will comfort and sustain me. (from page 62)
🌼 My security and significance come from experiencing an intimate relationship with God.
🌼 An intimate relationship with God begins as I believe I can be restored and that God accepts me as I am, with all my flaws and frailties.
Bridget:
🌻 God’s restoration work is far more wonderful than the temporary relief of our weight problems. (from page 47)
🌻 By eating low fat and living by rules, I’ve created entanglements that enslave me even more. Hunger within is still active and rules will not kill it. Rules will not bury it because it’s not dead. It is very much alive.
🌻 Food rules and restrictions will not set me free.
🌻 Losing weight will not change my life.
🌻 Diets promise freedom and deliverance but don’t deliver it. (from page 46)
🌻 As He did for Lazarus, Jesus waited to help me:
so that I’d be ready to hear and obey;
because He knows that as sick and desperate as I am, this will not end in death; and
that HE will be glorified in this deliverance and restoration.
Truth/Gratefulness List about my Teenage Daughter
by Christina
Those of you who have, or have had, teenage daughters know that it can be extremely challenging at times to communicate with and deal with some of the issues, communication challenges, and struggles that they have as they are growing up.
When I was having a particularly difficult season with her, I decided I needed to come up with a truth list, but I also needed to practice gratitude for her, so I incorporated gratitude into it. So whenever we were together and I was having a hard time, those thoughts of gratitude would came up in my mind and my heart and renew my mind about her.
I also want to invite God into the situation of parenting a teenager. So, for example, I might have a prayer time where I am focusing on just gratitude for her.
🌻 Lord, I am so thankful that she and I can get together and talk.
🌻 I am so thankful that she still opens up to me and tells me secret things, and confides in me.
🌻 I’m thankful that she confides in me about her friends and relationships.
🌻 Lord, I am so thankful for the times that she and I laugh together! We get silly and laugh and roll on the floor and giggle and have such a good time!
🌻 Lord, I am so thankful for my snuggle times with her! Even though, she sometimes pushes me away, as teenagers do, we still get on the couch and watch a favorite show together and snuggle.
🌻 Thank you so much that she and I go on coffee dates together. She loves that, and it draws her back to me. It’s a little something I can do for her.
🌻 Lord, thank you for my daughter. She is creative. She is smart. She is funny. She is passionate. She is a good friend to others. And I am grateful for all her good qualities right now.
Truth List Regarding Insecurity and Inadequacy
by Christina
This truth list is written in the form of a paragraph rather than a list, but it’s all the same truth. And I have been praying through it often lately! I am hoping that God will use it in some way with one of you!
I am really struggling with insecurity and inadequacy. I have just prayed through the insecurity questions in Barb Raveling’s book, I Deserve a Donut, and she is right. God’s view of me is so completely different than my view of myself! And what does the world see? “Oh… she has a lot going on but she can handle it.” And there is a part of me that fears that the people out there beyond my family are thinking “She doesn’t have time for me. … She doesn’t care about me. … I am not important to her.”
I have been trying so hard to take care of everything and everyone, and there is just not enough of me to go around. I am not strong enough, not healthy enough, not wise enough, and there is just not enough time to do it all. I have been giving myself no margin to just rest and be.
Even my rest times have been busy, taken quickly in the living room and working on things while laying down.
God hasn’t called me to be everything to everyone. God hasn’t called me to be perfect. God hasn’t called me to live and breathe in my own strength. God hasn’t called me to figure it all out or know all the answers…
God has called me to be His. To let Him. To submit to Him. To rest in Him. To trust Him. To surrender to Him. To let Him be my strength. To invite Him into everything, and I mean everything.
God has called me to lay down my weapons, to stop striving and to let Him lead me, even carry me at times. God has called me to give Him my heart. But there is peace in surrender. Sweet, pure, perfect and supernatural peace. And that is what I am desperately longing for.
Truth List about Having an Illness
by Christina
Here is the Truth List that Jesus and I put together a while back about one of my biggest challenges — my illness. You can easily change it up to fit your own needs. Hope this helps and encourages you in some way!
🌳 Jesus is my healer.
🌳 Jesus is healing me.
🌳 Jesus is in full control of the Lyme Disease treatment process.
🌳 Jesus knows and sees what I am going through… every symptom, its severity, its duration, and how I am limited because of it.
🌳 Jesus knows that the way I feel physically is very closely connected to the way I feel emotionally and spiritually.
🌳 Jesus sees and understands what I am grieving as a result of Lyme Disease. He grieves with me.
🌳 Jesus has not forgotten me.
🌳 Jesus is not confused or tired or absent or busy with other things.
🌳 Jesus hears and answers every prayer that is said for me by myself or someone else.
🌳 Jesus is in control of the timing of this journey and His timing is always perfect.
🌳 Jesus is using this trial for His own perfect plans and purposes in my life, and in my family and friends’ lives.
🌳 Jesus is strong in my weakness.
🌳 Jesus will provide what is needed for whatever He is asking of me.
🌳 Jesus is my Savior… not people, not food, not distraction, not what I can do or accomplish.
🌳 Jesus calls me to surrender to Him every moment of every day in the midst of this challenging journey.
🌳 Jesus calls me to love Him with my whole heart and to let Him order and arrange and prioritize my days.
🌳 Jesus will complete the work that He is doing in me.
🌳 Jesus is protecting me daily from much, much worse.
🌳 Jesus is doing a work in my heart.
🌳 Jesus will cause everything about this journey to work together for my good and the good of those I love.
🌳 Jesus is mine and I am His.
🌳 Jesus has chosen me to be His beloved girl, redeemed and washed clean and radiant in His sight.
🌳 Jesus does absolutely nothing outside of His boundless love and relentless grace for me.
🌳 Jesus will never fail me.
🌳 Jesus is with me.
🌳 Jesus has me.
Truth List about Eating with my Family:
by Christina
🍔 Eating with my family is a precious gift from God.
🍔 My family includes three fun, silly, interesting teenagers and I love the stories that are shared at the table!
🍔 In a few years we will have an empty nest and I will miss family dinners.
🍔 Truly celebrating and enjoying family dinners has nothing to do with eating too much food.
🍔 Eating God’s way at dinner honors God and the precious gift he has given me in my family.
🍔 Being the last one to take a first bite ensures that I am being a servant of my family.
🍔 When I take even smaller portions, eat at a ridiculously slow pace, choose water as a beverage and listen to my body I am surrendering to God’s way of eating and that feels GOOD.
🍔 True freedom is being able to say “That’s just enough.”
🍔 God’s way is always best for me!
Truth List about Chocolate Chip Bundt Cake & Anything Chocolate Chip:
by Christina
This has to do with emotional attachment to a food. There is a certain cake in our family that is very very important. Why? What’s the big deal?
Well, growing up, my mom was not a cook or a baker, and so she had just a couple of recipes that were very special. She needed some kind of go-to for potlucks, birthdays, and special events. She had one cake that she made my entire childhood – a Chocolate Chip Bundt Cake. It’s really easy to make, and it’s absolutely delicious!
That means every birthday, every gathering with others we loved and cared for, every church potluck, every time people came to visit, we had that cake! It was also special to me because my mom would involve my brother and I while she made it! And it would be a big deal… we would put in the eggs, and mix the batter, and make sure to alternate the flour and the sour cream… it was like an art on how to make this ONE special cake! And then we got to lick the bowl – who gets the spoon and the beaters? So you can imagine how special this cake was in our family!
Several years ago, my mom wasn’t able to make it anymore because of the Alzheimer’s Disease. But still do! I can make it in my sleep. I can whip it up in 10 minutes and have it in the oven. I try to make it often, and not just for special occasions. I also make it for my parents because it’s special to them.
(Here’s Maddie — center — with one of these cakes for her birthday! That’s Christina’s mom, Silke, on the left, and Christina on the right!)
So you can imagine how emotionally attached I am to this cake! And how impossible it seems to eat 0-5 with it. When I make the batter, I just want to eat the whoooole thing!
For years I didn’t really understand why! I thought: What is the big deal?!?!? Why do I have NO self control whatsoever with this one food? It’s a go-to for me, if I’m feeling very sad, or very angry, or upset… or celebratory!
And everything chocolate chip has become a go-to for me because of that cake: chocolate chip muffins, chocolate chip cookies, chocolate chip granola bars and scones, chocolate chips in yogurt, ice cream, chocolate chip cookie dough, chocolate chip mint ice cream, and shakes…
One day the Lord and I sat down together and we did some journaling. Well, *I* did the writing, and I tried to listen while He talked. I asked:
“Lord, I want to understand! I don’t want this to master me! Will You help me? Show me what’s going on here? And show me what is true from Your perspective so that I can make and enjoy this cake! And not eat to an 8 every time I do, and then I feel awful!”
So first, He showed me why I have this very strong emotional attachment to anything chocolate chip. (All the above that I’ve shared.)
And here is my very short Truth List about Chocolate Chip Cake: Only three truths, but it’s enough; it’s power-packed and it’s enough to help me each time I’m getting ready to bake it or eat it, or anything chocolate chip…
🍪 Chocolate chips do not own me; they remind me of love and nurturing from my mom and Omama.
🍪 I am not mastered by anything chocolate chip. I’m not! It’s just food! I’m NOT!
🍪 Chocolate chip foods do not provide comfort, love, nurturing, energy, or healing. They don’t! They don’t provide ANY of that!
🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪
As a special treat (quite literally), I thought it would be fun to see Christina’s Chocolate Chip Bundt Cake recipe itself! And she graciously consented to allowing me to include it right here! She doesn’t need it herself as she has it memorized and can make it in her sleep! But she wrote this one for a friend and had her get a picture of it just for this blog post! (Yes, she is that wonderful!)
And it looks like it is well used! Hopefully the Truth Lists in this article will be, too!
(Be sure to use Christina’s last Truth List if you make this recipe or anything chocolate chip, if this is a challenge for you as well!)
Thank you, Christina and Heidi for your candid contributions to this blog post!
And blessings on you, our dear reader and fellow sojourner, and on your process of using any/all of the above Truth Lists, as well as coming up with your own! – which we would love to see! Please feel free to share in a comment!
Christina and I are prayer partners for the current two-week span and she sent me this picture of the snowlady she and her daughters made in their front yard…
She wrote, “Fun in the snow! ❄️⛄️❄️ Isn’t she just adorable??? We named her Meridith!”
Recognizing that scarf as not only being Christina’s favorite flower, 🌻🌻🌻 but as having seen it ON her person in one of her porch chats…
Screen shot of Christina doing a porch chat
…I said, “Meridith is just toooooo cute!!!!! ⛄️ Did she have permission to use that scarf?!?!?? 😆”
She responded, “Of course! She and I are already becoming good friends! 🌼💕❤️🍃😀😀”
Aware that the warming weather would soon have “diminishing” effects on Meridith, Christina added “I don’t think she will be here long, though…😳☃️🍃.”
So the next morning I asked her, “How is Meridith doing? Is the warming-up weather imposing rapid weight-loss mode onto her?!?! ⛄️😄
(Just so you know, we DO actually talk about spiritual things as well! Right after this I shared my prayer for her from Psalm 22!)
On our Thin Within coaching call (with Heidi and Christina) later than afternoon, Christine told the rest of the girls in our group about Meridith, and sadly added that the sunshine had been shrinking Meridith quite a bit. A few of us shared with delight: “She’s melting down to her God-given size!!”
Christina went on: “Okay! Here comes the good part, girls! All Meridith had to do to shrink down to her God-given size was just be in the light and warmth of the sun! Isn’t that COOL?!?!?”
I said “I feel a blog article coming on!” and asked Christina to send me a picture of Meridith in her current melting state. Christina then asked me to do “before and after” pictures of Meridith, and to “use my magic” to put a face on her since hers had fallen off… which I did using carrot and leaf emoticons, and the “draw” feature of my photo editor. Not the greatest, but better than a blank stare!
So how might this look in real life? I started pondering what “melting in the light of the sun” might entail, and remembered I had already written about this very thing in a blog article I wrote a couple years ago called “How Does God Redeem Stuff?”
In it, I share five “methods” (actions, ways) God has led me to – and used in me to – redeem many things in my life. Two of those items – “expose” and “soak” – are perfect for our snowlady analogy as they explain what it means to expose ourselves to – and soak in – God’s warm light!
I’m going to share those two sections of that article here! (Well… Assuming I can get permission from the author! I hear she’s quite a stickler!)
.
EXPOSING
Let’s start by thinking of a rock on the ground. It’s been sitting in the sunshine, so it’s nice and dry and warm…
Turn the rock over, and what might you see on the underside of that rock? … Scampering bugs, wiggling worms, dirt, mud.
What’s the best way to get the underside of that rock as warm, dry, smooth, clean and bug-free as the top of it? Should we urge the rock to go to a rock spa and get a make-over and scrub itself off?
Nope! Just turn it over and expose it to the Sun! Given a little time, the wet-turned-dry dirt can just be brushed off, leaving that underside nice ‘n’ clean – with no effort whatsoever on the part of the rock! All it had to do was let itself be exposed tot he warm rays of the sun.
Need a human picture? This guy is perfectly emulating this concept:
Likewise, I have had many bug-infested “rocks” in my life. Rather than try to clean myself up, the Lord has many times led me to just allow Him to gently turn one of my [many] rocks over in His loving hand and expose it to His warming, penetrating, healing, freshening rays! – which do all of the healing, cleansing work! All I had to do was simply lay there with my wound, dirt, or ugliness exposed to Him!
.
SOAKING
My mother-in-love made the most amazing pickles! But they didn’t start out their pickley lives as winners. They began as dill – or, for the sake of our analogy, we’ll call them sour pickles.
To be transformed into the amazing sweet pickles they became, all they had to do was SOAK in the NEW brine that I put them in!
What does that brine consist of? 3 cups of sugar and 1 cup of vinegar. (See my “Grandma Shelton’s Rebrined Pickles” blog post for the recipe and directions.)
Two of the “sweetest” things we can soak in are:
God’s Word, theBible – “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God – what is good and acceptable and perfect.” (Romans 12:2)
Worship – Whatever we look at, we become more like it. The more we focus on fashion, the more we want to be fashionable. (And thin!) The more we focus on food, the more we want it. But as we dwell on the Lord, the more we want Him, and the more we actually become like Him! And “As the Spirit of the Lord works in us, we become more and more like Him.”
(In the article I share a bitter, “vinegar-esque” thing we might soak in that actually aids in the transformation process, but we’ll just stay with the sugar aspect here.)
These pickles take a week to be completely transformed into the best pickles I have ever tasted! EVER!!! And they didn’t even have to go on a self-improvement kick! They just soaked in that transforming brine, getting sweeter as the days went by!
Likewise, if we soak in God’s Word, letting His “higher thoughts” soak into us, renewing our minds… If we get our eyes off of our sour selves and worship our mighty, loving God, we will become more and more like Him, and get sweeter as the days, months, and years go by!
So thank you, Christina and girls, for creating Meridith and sharing her with us, thereby inspiring any of us who are struggling to melt down to our natural God-given size to:
• lay down our striving to fix ourselves and…
• simply spend more time exposing ourselves to the Son, soaking in His healing warmth.
I’ve noticed that, as I’m getting close to zero ~ truly hungry, but not starving ~ anxiety rises up in me. If I’m busy and my mind is occupied, anxiety is less likely to happen, but it often does.
I obviously need the Lord to renew my heart and mind regarding zero. So I thought I’d start by defining anxious.
The word anxious has two different, almost opposite meanings, and I feel both aspects of the word as I approach zero…
One kind of anxious is what you feel when you’re looking forward to something and you have tingly butterflies in your tummy. Like when you think of meeting a friend for coffee, or going to get a pedicure, or an upcoming vacation to a fun destination. Eating my next meal may not be quite as exciting as vacation or a pedi, but my resident butterflies nonetheless say otherwise.
Linked to the fun kind of anxiety is the other kind of anxiety – where you feel nervous with a sickish sense of dread. Like…
• a test coming up that you haven’t studied for, or…
• stopped-up traffic on the freeway when you’re trying to get to the airport, or…
• someone told you they want to talk to you, but didn’t tell you why, and you have a hunch it’s going to be hard.
Because of that dreadish kind of anxiety, just getting down to zero is a huge victory for me!
In my “pre-Thin-Within” days, I seldom felt hungry! Seriously! I often went months without ever feeling a single hunger pang! If I ever did, it was purely accidental; never planned for, and certainly not something I desired or sought!
So I’m thankful that I’ve become much more acquainted and comfortable – in an uncomfortable way – with zero! It’s not quite my “friend,” but we’re definitely more than “mere acquaintances.”
Instead of rushing to fill my tummy once I hit zero – and thus stuff that anxiety with food – I have asked the Lord to give me a fresh view of zero, to help me renew my mind about it.
I want to deal a death blow to the dreadish anxiety, but doing so is a process. And, thanks to Thin Within, I have a wonderful array of tools to help me deal with these anxieties!
I’m “attacking” it from four different angles, which I think of as the four sides of a boxing ring. I actually hate how violent boxing is! Why would any sane person would put themselves inside a ring where the sole intent of their opponent is to punch them repeatedly and win over them by knocking them out! But that is exactly what I want to do to my unruly appetite! Deal its unruliness some death blows and gain victory over it!
The four “punches” I’m utilizing are to: 1) Renew my Mind about Anxiety, 2) Make Truth Cards (or a Truth List) about Zero, 3) Gain Wisdom Regarding Eating (Once I’m at Zero), and 4) A Prayer as I Approach Zero.
Let’s take them one by one…
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1. RENEW MY MIND ABOUT ANXIETY
I did a word study on anxiety using a study tool I share in “Two Forms for Studying Scripture” called the “Word Alive Study.” Here’s the one I did on the do-on-your-computer version. (There’s also a print-and-write-in version for those who prefer handwriting.) I copied the definition from Webster’s 1828 Dictionary and pasted it into a box on this form!
(Click on this form to see it more clearly in a new window; click your back arrow to return here.)
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2. MAKE TRUTH CARDS (AND/OR A TRUTH LIST) ABOUT “ZERO”
To get a fresh view of zero, I created several Truth Cards about it and made a Truth List using the same truths. So the two are the same in content; one is just in card form, with one truth per card and a pretty picture or page, and the Truth List is just a list of the same truths. This can be hand-written on a piece of paper, or typed and printed out, in a list on your phone or computer. Or you could make them into a small booklet.
Here are several truths relating to “zero”:
When I reach my zero, it is not an excuse to chow down, but to simply replenish my body’s fuel.
I need to be more thoughtful about my zero, and “spend” it wisely and with self control.
Zero is not to be feared; it is God’s design for my body – as is self control.
“The Lord Himself is my inheritance, my prize, He is my food and drink, my highest joy.” (Psalms 16:5)
“Nothing tastes as good as obedience feels.” ~Heidi Bylsma
“When I eat at zero, food tastes so much better, I am free from bondage to food, and I feel peaceful and content.” ~Christina Motley
And here are several of the above truths made up into Truth Cards. These first four are photo/graphic truth cards I made in Canva(.com):
I also make many on my phone using Word Swag, an awesome free app. Here are three using that:
I keep all my digital Truth Cards in an album on my phone, and have printed some out and added to a pack of Truth Cards.
These last two are actual physical cards in a spiral card pack that I made like small scrapbook pages, using stickers, pretty papers, and buttons:
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3. GAIN WISDOM REGARDING EATING (ONCE I’M AT ZERO)
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EATING PARAMETERS & ENVIRONMENT
The Keys to Conscious Eating are the foundation of becoming wise in how we eat. These are presented and discussed in:
However, even though the concepts are simple, for those of us with disordered eating and food addiction, it’s not so simple. This is why there are several more resources to help you dig down and deal with the reasons behind our disordered eating. (It’s not just a simple matter of loving food!) These resources each have different but dove-tailing messages that will greatly help you gain freedom from food addiction:
There are no food rules in Thin Within! No “taboo” foods, omitting of entire food groups, nor focusing on just a few certain foods… just common sense, really. And, while there are some basics that don’t vary much, specifics vary from person to person.
Here are a few words from Judy Halliday in Hunger Within, page 112:
There are no forbidden foods. Nevertheless, as we follow the leading of the Spirit, we will find ourselves making wiser, healthier, God-honoring choices. While we have the freedom to choose what we will eat or drink, we know not every food or beverage is beneficial for us, nor do we want to be enslaved by anything. When we are guided by the grace-giving keys to conscious eating, we recognize that certain foods can be detrimental to our health, and are best enjoyed in moderation or avoided. We also develop discernment about what we call “trigger” foods and beverages.
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4. A PRAYER AS I APPROACH ZERO
Finally, in my prayer, I want to cover what I’m feeling as I approach zero: the good anxiety of looking forward to eating, the harmful anxiety of fearing that I will throw off all restraint and just binge.
Lord, I’m getting close to zero, and I need You to help me process this anxiety that I’m feeling, and not just rush to squelch it with food. I’m excited to eat, but I don’t want to use it as an opportunity to indulge my flesh.
I don’t want to have my heart be so connected to eating that I look forward to eating more than is appropriate. So help me utilize the Keys to Conscious Eating and really take time to enjoy what You have provided for me.
I’m also feeling some fear that I will lose self-control and just devour everything in sight, so would You live Your life through and in me so that, “by the mighty power of the Spirit of the Lord at work within me,” I can eat as You originally designed me to eat? I want to learn how to “eat to live instead of living to eat”!
We do not earn grace or our salvation. Salvationis “the free gift of God to those who believe in Christ Jesus” and graceis “unmerited, unearned favor.” Which means we don’t have to DO a single thing to get them. Both are entirely free!
So I think of doing “all the above” work not as a way to earn my healing and victory, but simply as applying all that He has given me to “work out [my] salvation,” making it my own, especially as it relates to this very difficult area of my life. This helps me get all the hindrances out of the way that keep me from receiving all God has offered me! And you, as well!
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Please feel free to share any prayers YOU pray as you approach zero, as well as any insights you have gained in this arena that would bless and encourage your fellow journeyers!
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