Today was weigh in day. With the weird month I had…bloating up 12 pounds, my GI tract all sploogied and the ulcer and all…well, I wasn’t sure what today would bring. I have felt a bit like I am floundering.

But the good news is that I am down 64 from where I began in November.

The thing is, I really need to learn to listen to God and heed his voice. I tend to minimize that it is really his voice, I think. When my body was reliable (before the ulcer), things were so concrete. Of course, I *thought* I was listening to Him then, too. Maybe now he is showing me that I was really turning 0 and 5 into a law instead of tuning into him. I know this is part of what this is about. Now I really have to evaluate if my flesh is working overtime to deceive me or if I am hearing from God. I am not doing so well with this.

While it hasn’t resulted in any wanton rebellious eating or anything, it still bothers me that this is where pride lurks. MY way. Even subtly…I don’t like that.

I want not to minimize the involvement God wants to have in my life.