I hope you got to watch the Mark Hall testimony. If you are someone that comments to this blog and don’t mind letting me know any input you have about that, I would sure appreciate it. Like if it didn’t seem relevant, was too long for you to want to view, that sort of thing. It helps me to get some feedback about blog contents.

My own thoughts about chapter 14 of Thin Within by Arthur and Judy Halliday….

This chapter reminds me personally of some of the things that God has been teaching me…It is time to return to that which He has led me to KNOW.

There is a lot of value in looking at my reactions and evaluating what is behind it. Barb Raveling refers in Freedom From Emotional Eating to “truth journaling.” In Search For Significance Robert McGee includes a process of the “Trip In.” These are similar ideas to what is shared in chapter 14.

In a nutshell, the idea found in chapter 14 of Thin Within and my interpretation of these other two resources is that what I believe will affect my actions. If I evaluate what I believe to see if truth or lie is at the heart of my belief, and then replace lies I believe with truth, I can experience some positive changes in my behavior in the moment…which can radically transform my life in the longer haul.

It is powerful stuff and really makes a difference.

This was illustrated for me a week or so ago. My son will be 17 (I can’t believe it!) on Thursday. He will have his driving test soon and drives whenever he can. We live in a small town and you have to drive a canyon road in order to get to “civilization.” Having him drive that road has added many a gray hair to my already whitening head. But really? He is a pretty good driver for a young buck, if I say so myself. 🙂

Last week, as he was driving through the canyon. In spite of driving well, a motorcycle law enforcement officer was following Daniel closely. This police officer or sheriff (whatever he was, I didn’t notice) wasn’t following Daniel because Daniel was doing anything wrong. The officer was doing what many people driving through the canyon do…pushing the person in front of him (Daniel). Frankly, the motorcycle cop was…tailgating!

Daniel pulled over as soon as he could (which is an issue on this road) in case the motorcycle cop wanted something…but no…the motorcycle blitzed on by. Daniel was beside himself. He didn’t want to drive any more. He did drive the rest of the way out of the canyon, but wanted me to drive after that. He was devastated. It turned out that Daniel believed that he had been driving badly because of the officer’s tailgating. This made Daniel afraid that we would have an accident…which made him want to no longer drive. (We have some maturity issues to deal with, certainly.)

No matter what I said or asked Daniel about what the FACTS indicated, because he believed a lie–that he was driving badly and could cause an accident–he couldn’t get over how he felt and what he thought he had to DO as a result.

God used this experience to show me that I do the same thing. Even my rant here at the blog Monday is a parallel to this situation.

Think about it…

Something that has happened to me…something real (like Daniel being followed too closely by the motorcycle cop). I have ascribed meaning to it that may not be accurate or reflect God’s truth, just like Daniel assumed that if a motorcycle cop was following closely it meant he was a bad driver and would have an accident.

I have then embraced that meaning as if it is truth, thus believing a lie. I have then clung to activity or inactivity based on my embracing this lie as truth, just as Daniel couldn’t stand driving after that–interestingly enough, as with Daniel, believing this lie could have actually affected his driving. Driving with less confidence can make him have difficulty making wise on-the-spot decisions! He could then be a poor driver, all because of what he believed–the LIE!

The results seen in my life are all based on believing a lie…believing this lie affects how I “drive” through my life.

I have to take a step back and choose to replace the LIE with God’s TRUTH.

Chapter 14 gives us an opportunity to do this practically. I hope you did this activity and actually wrote something in the blanks on pages 146 and 148.

What did you learn as you did?

Something that struck me on Monday…following my writing of my post about how I was feeling…I have been afraid that I would DIE if I waited on the Lord–that he would let me sit there in pain and I would suffer longer. I have been afraid to be still in my pain and to wait for him to come with healing. Therefore, I have filled up my life with too much busy-ness and returned to other coping mechanisms as well, as I shared on Monday.

You know what? This may be what happens…I may have to suffer longer…That IS truth in this! Case in point…

Jesus stayed two days where he was when he received word that Lazarus was sick. Jesus seemed to delay! Lazarus DID die.

If Jesus handles Lazarus like he does me, I MAY die as I wait for him. (Maybe not literally, as Lazarus did). But the TRUTH is that I MAY.

But…and this is the important part…if Jesus handles me as he did Lazarus, something greater is ahead as well…something that rocks my world (in a good way)…a resurrection.

So my fear…the lie I believe…that I will die and that will be the end of it and that is that…can be replaced by the truth that, yes, I may die, but Jesus can raise even the dead…and he does…I can bank on it.

God was glorified in that death and the following resurrection.

This gives me hope. That even if he allows me to feel such pain and even to “die,” that God will work an amazing revelation of himself through it…and be glorified. I am sure that if we were to ask Lazarus if he would trade the sickness and death for what he learned through the experience and the subsequent resurrection, he would probably say no. He probably loved getting to know Jesus all that much more…and Mary and Martha would likely concur!

For the record…no, I haven’t been binging. Nothing like that. Some of you have asked privately why I am drawn to food more now. Frankly, though I am drawn to food, I don’t find eating my primary “failure.” I am eating usually 0 to 5, but sometimes a bit before hunger and a bit more than I need. (Like 1 – 6.) Nothing blatantly “overeating.” Though…it is the small compromises that can get in there and be problematic (the “little foxes that spoil the vineyard!”).

The primary coping mechanisms that I have resorted to have been diet soda (again) and being overly busy. I am still the same size I was at the beginning of the summer.

My heart has had my biggest concern…and the lies I believe. These are changes in a direction I don’t want to go…