Whew! We are in Ocean City. I only have internet access down in the lobby here…and the family is up going to sleep, so I need to get up there, but I wanted to check in quickly. We traveled from Williamsburg, Virgina today to Chincoteague and Assateague until we arrived in Ocean City, Maryland. We will be leaving early tomorrow for Philadelphia. CONQUER! CONQUER! CONQUER!
Eating went fine until tonight. I must confess…I had a rebellious attitude…an “I JUST WANT IT” arrogance that I allowed to emerge. Bob and I slipped away to a seafood place–I hate seafood. So I had some of his fries. They were THE best fries in the world. I had NO idea french fries could be so good. But then I chased that with a very decadent hot fudge brownie sundae smothered in whipped cream. I didn’t have much of either, but I was honestly at a 3 on the hunger scale when I began…and finished at about an 8 and, as hubby would say, “I wasn’t DONE yet!” Pout pout.
I have repented and God has forgiven me for willful rebellion. In all honesty, today was a very emotional day. My husband said something that wounded me deeply. I was drawn to food and knew that, if my accountability partner had been present, she would have said, “Who do you need to forgive?” I knew I needed to forgive my husband (and my son for other wrongs…it is easy to offend me in a small car going across a couple of states! EEEK!). So I chose to forgive and chose NOT to eat. These are GOOD things. I am delighted that I made this choice. A number of times I had a thought of food outside of hunger…but said no.
Tonight, though, it wasn’t emotional…it was rebellion. So…next time, NPO! Nothing Passes Orally when I go into a restaurant so hubby can get his special food and I am not hungry! I planned to be rebellious. It was a pre-meditated rebellion.
So now I will capture this moment for the Lord…all is well. God forgives and I am thankful for that. I will not allow this failure to spell further failure. Again, just because one moment or even a series of moments of indiscretion occurred, it doesn’t negate all the work God is doing and has done! THIS IS NOT A DIET! If it were a calories thing, it might be that easy to “wipe out” all the hard work…but no…this is about my heart. I have seen the Lord work in me SO much…and I know it is for ETERNITY! Thank you, Lord!