I have been struggling. Writing about TLT lessons and experiencing a passion in my heart about the Lord and this journey in the wee hours of the morning…and by evening, throwing my care to the wind and being rebellious. It isn’t about the food…it is about the heart. I have been saddened by what has been revealed to be in my heart.
The enemy also accuses me. “You are such a hypocrite and fraud! You spout off about ‘holiness’ and ‘humility’–but LOOK at you! You are arrogant and prideful and your attitude PROVES that! Why don’t you just admit that you will NEVER be all those things that you claim to be and just give it up?”
The battle is very real. In fact, I thought about not sharing today about TLT lesson because of it. But this is the VERY lesson I *should* share. It is so profound, deep, and life-changing. (Even now I battle hearing the voice of the enemy “Yeah, like *your* life has really changed, you liar!!!”)
I will ignore it…2 Corinthians teaches me I have divine power to demolish strongholds. I can tear down anything that stands against the knowledge of God and take captive any thoughts and make them obedient to Christ. So right now I choose to do so.
TLT – Day 8 – The Cross
Here is what I wrote in my journal about this day in The Lord’s Table material.
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This is a powerful lesson. Lord, please help me to experience all you have in mind. Let it settle in my mind and make it through to my experience. I want to live, breathe, and apply your Word to my life.
First, Mike Cleveland defined overeating: “Overeating is defined as continuing to eat past the point of receiving all we need to sustain our lives.”
I have shared this thought with others before and found that people sure don’t like this definition. When I want to define it differently, I am:
“invent[ing] a god of my own making, to my own liking, a god that tolerates sin and overlooks continual indulgence of the flesh. I am very lenient with myself…” (p. 24 TLT)
I don’t want to create god in an image I can “tolerate” or who tolerates me! I want to be in relationship with the one True God!
When I gave in to the temptation to overeat in my past, I allowed a wall to be built between the Lord and me. I resented the Lord, in fact, for insisting that I surrender this to Him.
The Lord offered himself on the cross, though not *just* for the forgiveness of sins–which is HUGE–a BIG deal!–But also so that I might no longer wander away from Him–so that I could stay close to Him.
1 Peter 2:25 says “Rof you were continually straying like sheep, but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Guardian of your souls.”
I no longer need to stray. He has provided me a way to stay close. Thank you, Lord.
“The purpose of Jesus’ death is two-fold: first, that He might remove my sins from me and second that He might heal me from going astray and bring me back to God. It is God’s work to remove our sins from us, it is GOD’s work to heal us from going astray, and it is GOD’s work to cause us to return to the Shepherd and Overseer of our souls.” (p. 25, TLT)
I am reminded that I have been called for the purpose of suffering willingly like Jesus. (1 Peter 2:21)
“There is no other way to solve the sin problem than Jesus. There is no other way to be reconciled to God, to be changed from his enemy to His friend, to cease from going astray, than through Jesus.” (p. 25, TLT)
The author states that it is vital to see that overeating is a sin. We can’t hate ourselves into change as one Thin Within participant said so eloquently…but we can hate our SIN and must hate our sin!
“We must begin to detest [our sinful behaviors] with all of our being and to think of them as sin against our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, in order to truly turn away from them and find victory. If we minimze them, we will continue to flirt with them and treat them as no big deal. Begin to seek the Lord about giving you a heart that hates all sin, including your sinful eating habits.” (p. 27, TLT)
Summary: Jesus provided payment for my sin and a way that I can no longer go astray. He did this by the cross. As I ask Him to do so, he will help me to detest my sin of overeating and enable me to turn from it and stay close to Him. God provided Christ out of his compassion and love for me. I want to embrace all that He has done through the cross for all I am worth!
Application: Have I asked the Lord to help me to detest all my sin? Do I agree with TLT conclusion that overeating is eating more than I need to sustain my life? Or do I think a few bites more than that is ok? Who is my authority in this? Am I willing to be humble about it? Am I willing to hear what God may clearly say about it, or do I resist? How will I choose to live differently in light of these things?
Lord, please help me to be open to whatever the truth is about this issue. If my mind and heart are closed, please show me. Whatever YOU define as sin in my life…that is what I want to detest. Lord, please work this in me. Thank you for the cross. You have poured out compassion, grace, mercy and love through offering Jesus on the cross for me. I don’t have to fear calling overeating a sin. I am not condemned! Jesus took the condemnation for me that I might be saved through Him. Thank you for the cross. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
NEW!
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HeidiI felt the Holy Spirit nudging me to respond to several things you wrote today.The enemy is working in me in pride, telling me you are not interested in what I have to say.So here goes:I wanted to tell this to you privately, but since you are so honest I know God is leading me to be. I told you I did Beth Moore’s Believing God. I did it right before my daughter had a stroke. So here I go to the hospital with faith strong, and my daughter (26 year old mother, wife, nurse and appeared to be totally healthy) died in 8 days. Oh, I beat myself up; I could not grasp a cruel God that would send such a Bible study to me and then take my daughter from me. It took months of examining my heart and mourning to get to the place of sheer brokenness. God is who He says He is and what He decides to do is up to HIM. I came out of the loss stronger I think.Then our ladies in our church did the Bible study and I began to see the goodness of God and how He brought Beth Moore’s teaching into my life to help me.A dear friend of mine just lost her six-year old daughter to cancer. I believe I am helping her through this.BUT when I get home from her house, the enemy beats me up and says all you did is whine and cry and throw temper tantrums on God when He took your daughter. Who are you to be helping her.And I tell him I am led by peace. I have the peace of God doing His will, and the outcome is up to God.Surely, Heidi, you feel the peace of God after posting these journals for the Holy Spirit is using them in my life and in my other daughter’s life. We read them daily.I don’t think you want flattery, and neither do I, but I do want to encourage you to keep helping people like my daughter and me, and many others. And most of all to be obeying God.
“The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the congtrary, they have divine powre to demolish strongholds. We demolish agruments and every pretension (an assumedd right, claimed true or false) that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” 2 Cor. 10:4-5Satan also comes barrelling into my thought life, and like you I sit at my blog and have thoughts, ‘you are you to write this, no one is going to want to hear this, look at how your failing,’. bla bla bla he goes on!Like you, like Merrysfaithwalk, Satan wants our mouths to be shut, NOT to share our struggles, our encuragements, because he knows the power our testimony has in Christ Jesus.”By the blood of the Lamb, and through the Word of their testimony, they have overcome the evil one” Rev. He wants us to be silent. When we are humble and honestly share our struggles, our pain with others, it opens up doors of healing not only for ourselves, but to those that are with us, or reading what we have shared..Not sure if you wrote this the same day I wrote,Crucifying the Flesh devotional on my blog, but what you have written here has been on my own heart. My cry to God, asking forgiveness, desiring to be obedient to His call, not allowing food to be an idol.God bless you precious one and know I will be praying as you go to this vidoe taping. I have a few books of Beth Moore and watch her on James Roberson (sp?). ((hugs))Angela