(Note: For those who don’t know, “Flesh Machinery” is that which causes us to be lured or drawn to food when we aren’t physically hungry. It is things that are in our emotional or habitual or even just mental programming that kick in like being on “auto-pilot”…like when a DVD is on, we go for the microwave popcorn or when Mom comes to visit, we begin foraging through the pantry for the chips…all without concern for physical hunger and satisfaction.)
My new flight will leave tomorrow about 5pm from Tulsa. I fly to Dallas Fort Worth and from there fly to Sacramento, getting in at 9:30pm or so.
Flesh Machinery…yes, there is a lot…the emotional turmoil of adjusting my mind to leaving my dear friend behind, psyching myself up for the travel (I hate to travel…have I said that yet?), the knowledge that my sister and mom and husband need me to take care of business with my Mom (many phone calls and emails since the last time I wrote about this in the last entry), feeling sorry for myself: “Lord, why did this have to happen?” (poor baby!), the disappointment/logistics about cancelling my Thin Within class tomorrow night since I won’t be there to lead it, oh golly gosh..I could write a million more things that I could complain about…all of which send me into an emotional topspin…wanting the REST of the chocolate bar (the big one, with almonds…the DOVE one…) that is over there on the counter!!!!!!!
So…instead of eating…inhaling…that mongo sized Dove chocolate bar (the one with the almonds that is open over there on the counter), instead of continuing with my list of all the reasons I am a basket case right now…I choose to take captive this moment (these moments!) and to give praise and thanks to God…
Thank you, Lord, that my husband is a doll to be willing to stay with my kids, be homeschool teacher, Mr. Mom, care for the horses, dogs, and also try to do his regular job….wow, Lord. He is amazing. AND he has been trying to get the bathroom all fixed up while I am gone…I know he has gone to a lot of trouble, Lord…God, thank you that Daniel (my almost 16-year-old) is getting along so well with Mr. Shaun, our neighbor doing the tile work. What a blessing that is! I hope that they can connect on a wonderful new level. Lord, thank you that my Mom just called me. If she is nothing else, she is giggly and silly. That is a good thing (even if the ER staff think she has Alzheimers…). Thank you! Ok…Lord, I am PRAISING YOU for all the good things that you give. Thank you for Jan and her husband, Ali, and their wonderful hospitality. I love my friend. In the Name of Jesus, Amen.Flesh machinery need not have the final word. Being controlled by the Spirit instead of all the “poor me” thoughts and other flesh machinery stuff….one moment at a time, taking captive this moment for you, Lord (and the chocolate bar doesn’t look quite so tempting when I praise YOU!).
Hi Heidi… Could really empathize with this post. Trying to acknowledge trust rather than fears. Praying for you that the remainder of your time with Jan will be blessed and that your trip home with be both safe and uneventful.
I’m so glad you posted this!! I had a fearful day today, which is not typical for me. I have residual health problems from a West Nile infection three years ago. I’ve never really bounced back and I’ve always wondered why. So I sat on the computer all day researching supplements, symptoms, causes, etc. I got done and I was a mess. I had all of this worldly sorrow thinking I had this problem or that disease, I should try this herb or that drug, I should quit eating certain foods -it consumed me. And even though I spent some time in prayer about it, it was still a time of “how can I fix this on my own?”Later on, I was running an errand with my sister. Driving along in her car, suddenly the Lord reminded me of one thing: grace! I need to actively trust him and wait to see what He will say and do. Gal. 2:22 says not to frustrate the Grace of God. It’s good to acknowledge our fears, so long as they move us closer to Him.I’m sorry for this long comment. I just had to say “I hear you!” and to thank you for the extra help in reminding myself to trust Jesus and not myself. His grace really is sufficient 🙂