with the two tablets of the Testimony in his hands,
he was not aware that his face was radiant
because he had spoken with the LORD.
– Exodus 34:29
Each time upon Moses’ return from being in the presence of the Lord in Exodus 34, his face was radiant. The Israelites could barely stand to look upon him because he was all aglow!
Have you ever known someone like that? Someone who seemed like they had been with God and reflected that outwardly? They might not have been beautiful by human standards, but something emanated from them –causing them to glow…and it spoke of intimacy with God.
The photo to the left is of my mother-in-law who is now with the Lord. Oh! How I love her! In this photo, Phyllis is eagerly opening a Christmas present. To make use of both hands–one of which had been occupied by holding a cookie she was enjoying–she held on to the cookie with her mouth instead. What a character!
I wish I had a picture that shows just how much she glowed with the radiance that only the Lord can do in a life. No matter what came her way, she had an outward gleam…and you could tell that while her feet may have been touching the pavement of this earth, her heart was in the presence of the Lord. It was obvious outwardly!
Likewise, God is after our personal spiritual formation and transformation! Often, this transformation results in outward physical changes. Definitely, when we allow him to have a hold of our hearts, it happens from within…and radiates outwardly. Sometimes it will affect our countenance. Sometimes, it may even affect our physical shape. But being with HIM is what makes the difference.
Try as we might to look a certain way–to look like Moses did after coming down from the Mountain–we can’t generate that on our own by outward constraints. The only way lasting transformation occurs is by walking/being with the Lord.
Likewise, the kind of physical changes that most of us want in our bodies…
So I guess this is the bad news. I may as well lay it out there right now! This is hard. In fact, it is likely harder than making changes to our bodies alone! For instance, how many of us know how to lose weight? If you are like me, you know how to do that really well. But what we haven’t quite gotten down is how to do this genuinely, authentically–without resentment or “feeling ripped off”…and in a way that lasts without obsession seeming to be necessary to keep it up.
This is what we are after. Or what I hope you are after with me.
God wants our hearts to belong to him (not to some “skinny” ideal or even to some vision of “health and wholeness!”). As we relinquish our hearts to him, we WILL change from the inside out.
—
Thoughts for you to ponder:
1.) What is really your priority right now? Is it:
a.) “To get this weight off!”
b.) “To do and be what I want.”
c.) “To depend on the Lord and to grow in my dependence on Him”
Obviously, most of us want to answer “c.)” but what is our honest answer? What does our behavior say? Or put another way and perhaps something that will tell us the truth about what our priority really is…What do you think about the most? That is usually a clue as to what you really want the most…as to what your priority is. Am I thinking about food all the time? Am I focused on the body that I don’t have but want? Or do I long to be more like Jesus? Ouch! That is convicting. At least to me!
Don’t allow the Enemy to use this to beat you up and please don’t beat yourself up! On page xv of the introduction we are told we will put away our “club of condemnation.” So let’s not get it out now. We will learn instead “to walk in newness of a grace-filled life in the present moment.”
If you find yourself honestly answering a.) or b.), never fear. God can work wonders when we are honest with him. Read Psalm 51–especially verse 12 and make it your prayer to God, “Lord please grant me a willing spirit…”
2.) Are you willing to foster an awareness of Jesus’ presence in every moment of your life? You can do this in your heart even in the midst of a hustle bustle work schedule or being with your kids or running errands or whatever you do. Truthfully, there is no way to experience the kind of lasting, deep, penetrating transformation that we really need apart from developing an awareness of his constant care and presence with you. Truly, this can be quite simple, but it is NOT easy!
What is your plan for being sure you depend on the Lord through this journey? How can you set yourself up for “success?” What I mean by “success” is not about eating or food, but about the heart change we need in order for the outward changes to “take” and “stick.” Right now, we may care most about physical changes…we want to lose weight! We *have* to lose weight! Truthfully, that is not God’s priority. Heart change is. I can’t say this enough!
—
In the introduction, we are reminded that we may have to “unlearn many things we have come to depend on over the years…” As we launch our study, many of us might slip into a “diet” mentality… You may not even realize it! These are things we will have to unlearn.
As we are reminded on page xv, “…our focus won’t be only on externals or appearances.”
I hope that message has come across loud and clear this morning as you have read through this entry. I know this is something I struggle with and that God yet is working with me on.
The prayer on page xv says it so well…and some of my prayer today for each of us is borrowed from there:
Lord, please open our eyes and release us from the chains that bind us. Help us to focus not on outward appearance or the changes that we want in our size or physical condition. Help us, instead, to focus on being willing to depend on you, lean on you, to need you…when something inside us lures us to food or drink or anything apart from you, cause us to wait on you instead…may we develop such a dependence on you that we stay in your presence throughout the day and our countenances reflect the radiance of those who are in the presence of the Lord. Remake and change us from the inside out. In the name of Jesus, Amen.
thank you Heidi, again. I have read all your blogs, daily, and find them very helpful. I am enjoying the book too.I am enjoying this journey with you so much. I feel so much more drawn to the Lord. My biggest fear is that I do not love him enough. You see, the dry periods cause me concern. I never want to be lukewarm, and sometimes it feels that way. Thanks for your help, you have no idea how much it means to me.God is awesome, and I so want to love and honor him at all times.madaline
thank you Heidi, again. I have read all your blogs, daily, and find them very helpful. I am enjoying the book too.I am enjoying this journey with you so much. I feel so much more drawn to the Lord. My biggest fear is that I do not love him enough. You see, the dry periods cause me concern. I never want to be lukewarm, and sometimes it feels that way. Thanks for your help, you have no idea how much it means to me.God is awesome, and I so want to love and honor him at all times.madaline
Heidi,Your mother-in-law looks so sweet. I had a mother and a mother=-in-law like that. Everytime I had a concern, they would just say (in Italian) leave it to God, his will be done, everything will work out. Then, they would pray. Prayer was part of their daily life, not just Sunday morning, everyday, and both woman had hard lives and yet they faced each day with joy, for they had the joy of the Lord in their hearts, and their faces radiated that.LOLmadaline
Heidi,Your mother-in-law looks so sweet. I had a mother and a mother=-in-law like that. Everytime I had a concern, they would just say (in Italian) leave it to God, his will be done, everything will work out. Then, they would pray. Prayer was part of their daily life, not just Sunday morning, everyday, and both woman had hard lives and yet they faced each day with joy, for they had the joy of the Lord in their hearts, and their faces radiated that.LOLmadaline
Yes, thank you Heidi. I had a rough night last night and I was ranting in my blog this morning, but I feel calm now and your words surely helped as well.Laura
Yes, thank you Heidi. I had a rough night last night and I was ranting in my blog this morning, but I feel calm now and your words surely helped as well.Laura
Two streams of thought: (1) "Are you willing to foster an awareness of Jesus' presence in every moment of your life?" Geez Heidi, now you're "meddlin'"! Of course you had to go there though, that's where Jesus wants to go! And in my inmost heart, I want to have this "never ceasing" awareness experience with Jesus, but in the course of my day I have many "hidden moments" I want to keep that way! Hidden bites, that are so deceitful in their call! Folly charms: "Stolen water is sweet; food eaten in secret is delicious!" Proverbs 9:17~ I still too often believe her temptress words that it's "no big deal" or "you deserve it" (diet mentality often creeps in here if I've eaten less or exercised), "you'll make up for it later" or words more subtle like "this is a process, no one expects you to get this overnight!". If I choose to listen, soon I am lured into "hidden behavior," whether in something clear like eating for a non-physical-hungry reason, or something subtle like pretending love or walking in hidden unforgiveness. Why do we (ok, I) fall for this when the Word is loaded with another "Truth": "He searches the sources of the rivers and brings hidden things to light." Job 28:11~ "You know my folly, O God; my guilt is not hidden from You." Psalm 69:5~ "He reveals deep and hidden things; He knows what lies in darkness, and light dwells in Him." Daniel 2:22~ I mean, what do I REALLY think I'm getting away with here? I totally forget that He IS here, watching, and really, He's listening, loving and caring all the while too! He's not just "here" in the sense that He's waiting for me to fail, but the opposite, He's waiting to rescue me! In my inmost desire I do NOT want to be hidden, I want to be seen, known and loved, afterall, that's His desire too and I am His daughter and creation made in His image. I want the peace and joy of a life lived in the Light, honest and true–FREE! No more lying about what's really going on in the moment, but being real from the inside out–with the promise that He cares, and is at work on my behalf! (2) The irony of the above hidden eating is that I had JUST finished journalling some thoughts to Him! I was sitting here with the leftovers from lunch sitting in the bag on my desk behind me, and thought, "my mouth is dry, I'm tired, I'm bored, hmmm…a few more bites won't be a huge setback, and it'll help me get through and avoid binging later." So, I took the bag, opened it up, and knew, knew, KNEW that I was NOT physiologically hungry. (Note: my journalling was about how I can see my unwilling spirit lately creeping in after a month of being "willing" to obey. I couldn't seem to get back on the path of trusting and obeying Him with hunger regularly. I realized that I had been coasting on willpower and not on God's power honestly…the first was leading me to binging because I wasn't dealing with the emotions that were driving me to food in the first place, so was just left feeling deprived. The latter though can FILL my soul and satisfy! Then there's no gnawing or emptiness left to flare up in desperation~) So summarizing this "moment aware of His presence", willpower will NOT work in this journey of heart transformation! The heart MUST be satisfied, deprivation will only make things worse. I'm NOT sufficient to care for the needs of my soul, and must go to the only One Who IS sufficient! And hiding my insufficiencies through pretending to have it in control, justifying my behaviors with flimsy excuses and believing that He doesn't see me, are all based on lies…and though He sees through them and loves me still, I'm the one suffering. And I don't have to…there's freedom to choose LIFE in Jesus' strength, and we can live honestly before Him. Oh Lord thank You that "all my longings lie open before you, O Lord; my sighing is not hidden from You." Psalm 38:9
Two streams of thought: (1) "Are you willing to foster an awareness of Jesus' presence in every moment of your life?" Geez Heidi, now you're "meddlin'"! Of course you had to go there though, that's where Jesus wants to go! And in my inmost heart, I want to have this "never ceasing" awareness experience with Jesus, but in the course of my day I have many "hidden moments" I want to keep that way! Hidden bites, that are so deceitful in their call! Folly charms: "Stolen water is sweet; food eaten in secret is delicious!" Proverbs 9:17~ I still too often believe her temptress words that it's "no big deal" or "you deserve it" (diet mentality often creeps in here if I've eaten less or exercised), "you'll make up for it later" or words more subtle like "this is a process, no one expects you to get this overnight!". If I choose to listen, soon I am lured into "hidden behavior," whether in something clear like eating for a non-physical-hungry reason, or something subtle like pretending love or walking in hidden unforgiveness. Why do we (ok, I) fall for this when the Word is loaded with another "Truth": "He searches the sources of the rivers and brings hidden things to light." Job 28:11~ "You know my folly, O God; my guilt is not hidden from You." Psalm 69:5~ "He reveals deep and hidden things; He knows what lies in darkness, and light dwells in Him." Daniel 2:22~ I mean, what do I REALLY think I'm getting away with here? I totally forget that He IS here, watching, and really, He's listening, loving and caring all the while too! He's not just "here" in the sense that He's waiting for me to fail, but the opposite, He's waiting to rescue me! In my inmost desire I do NOT want to be hidden, I want to be seen, known and loved, afterall, that's His desire too and I am His daughter and creation made in His image. I want the peace and joy of a life lived in the Light, honest and true–FREE! No more lying about what's really going on in the moment, but being real from the inside out–with the promise that He cares, and is at work on my behalf! (2) The irony of the above hidden eating is that I had JUST finished journalling some thoughts to Him! I was sitting here with the leftovers from lunch sitting in the bag on my desk behind me, and thought, "my mouth is dry, I'm tired, I'm bored, hmmm…a few more bites won't be a huge setback, and it'll help me get through and avoid binging later." So, I took the bag, opened it up, and knew, knew, KNEW that I was NOT physiologically hungry. (Note: my journalling was about how I can see my unwilling spirit lately creeping in after a month of being "willing" to obey. I couldn't seem to get back on the path of trusting and obeying Him with hunger regularly. I realized that I had been coasting on willpower and not on God's power honestly…the first was leading me to binging because I wasn't dealing with the emotions that were driving me to food in the first place, so was just left feeling deprived. The latter though can FILL my soul and satisfy! Then there's no gnawing or emptiness left to flare up in desperation~) So summarizing this "moment aware of His presence", willpower will NOT work in this journey of heart transformation! The heart MUST be satisfied, deprivation will only make things worse. I'm NOT sufficient to care for the needs of my soul, and must go to the only One Who IS sufficient! And hiding my insufficiencies through pretending to have it in control, justifying my behaviors with flimsy excuses and believing that He doesn't see me, are all based on lies…and though He sees through them and loves me still, I'm the one suffering. And I don't have to…there's freedom to choose LIFE in Jesus' strength, and we can live honestly before Him. Oh Lord thank You that "all my longings lie open before you, O Lord; my sighing is not hidden from You." Psalm 38:9
Wow…Heather…you said it so well! THANK YOU for adding some important truths to what we get to share in here! GOD IS SO GOOD! One of the things I loved is when you said this:willpower will NOT work in this journey of heart transformation! The heart MUST be satisfied, deprivation will only make things worse. SO RIGHT ON!!!!
Wow…Heather…you said it so well! THANK YOU for adding some important truths to what we get to share in here! GOD IS SO GOOD! One of the things I loved is when you said this:willpower will NOT work in this journey of heart transformation! The heart MUST be satisfied, deprivation will only make things worse. SO RIGHT ON!!!!
My favorite quote from the introduction is this:"…you will experience an invitation whispered to your soul from God–an invitation to enter in to draw nearer, to plunge deeper, to experience more fully the joy and abundant living that He intends for you."I have to be still if I am going to hear the whisper!
My favorite quote from the introduction is this:"…you will experience an invitation whispered to your soul from God–an invitation to enter in to draw nearer, to plunge deeper, to experience more fully the joy and abundant living that He intends for you."I have to be still if I am going to hear the whisper!
I am keeping this thought with me trough out the day- God is not interested in my half hearted attempts-Neither does he want perfection- what He wants is a genuine relationship with me- One where I run to Him for my wants and needs- This thought is keeping my heart and mind focused on Jesus- Lover of my soul! Amen!!!!!Thanks Heidi – you are doing a great job on the postsI ask for prayers from each of you here as we start our second round of thinwithin workbook one at my church in Alabama -Appreciate it
I am keeping this thought with me trough out the day- God is not interested in my half hearted attempts-Neither does he want perfection- what He wants is a genuine relationship with me- One where I run to Him for my wants and needs- This thought is keeping my heart and mind focused on Jesus- Lover of my soul! Amen!!!!!Thanks Heidi – you are doing a great job on the postsI ask for prayers from each of you here as we start our second round of thinwithin workbook one at my church in Alabama -Appreciate it