I have a friend with thin thighs…she is in a wheelchair and can’t walk. :-/
My thighs aren’t thin, but I am blessed to be able to walk and run and leap.
I love my thighs.
I can’t get the little girl in the video I shared yesterday out of my head. (I do wonder where that little girl is today, nine years later, and if she still stands strong in affirming so many things about life and herself or if she has fallen prey to the joy stealers in life like so many of us do.)
The little girl really got me thinking about affirmations. Does it honor God for me to say “I like my thighs,” “I like my hips,” “I like my arms…” etc? Or is it, like my teenager suggests, lying? That is a good question, but yesterday, as I played tennis with my daughter, I found myself wanting to emulate the young girl in the video. I said it out loud to “try it on.” Chasing down tennis balls, I declared with boldness (after looking around to be sure no one was likely to hear me): “I like my thighs!” and you know what? In that moment, I really did! Saying so, really seemed like a huge step of victory for me! Without my thighs and legs and knees, I wouldn’t be able to enjoy playing tennis or any number of other things out there. No, I may not like the way my thighs look, but I know that the function of my thighs is worth far more than appearance and I think my wheelchair-bound friend would agree.
A couple of days ago, even before I shared the video with you all, I posted something at the Thin Within forums (found at http://www.thinwithin.org/forums) in response to someone lamenting that they don’t like the way her body looks. Since I have had so many changes in my own body, I responded:
I understand frustration with physical appearance. I used to think in my arrogance (I am ashamed to say) that people that blamed menopause for any number of things didn’t want to “own it”…but now I see that there are some legitimate things that come with menopause.
In my case, I lost 100 pounds using principles of Thin Within. I finally was a “success story.” Kept it off relatively effortlessly (though with fear, I must admit) for a year…and then started gaining some back. I threw out the scale a year ago. I have no idea how much weight I gained before I stopped gaining and, for me, it all connected with the timing of “The Change.” I started going through “The Change” of life when the weight came on and I stopped gaining when “The Change” was over.
Now my size has stabilized again and I feel like I am eating like I used to back when I was smaller, but it is sustaining a bigger size. (Please note, I know that I have not been “stellar” in obeying the Lord’s voice in my eating as well. )
So a couple of things are different for me… my “natural God-given” size may be different than I thought…and my shape is different…and…well, I look at my body now and I carry weight where I didn’t carry weight before…my thighs. I mean…disproportionately, it seems. Even at 250 pounds, I don’t remember my thighs ever looking like they do now.
But I can still walk, run, leap and play.
God is helping me work through a disdain for my body all over again…something that I thought I was past in 2006.
I have been pregnant three times and carried two babies to term. I have nursed them. I have climbed mountains, ridden horses, worked to build fences, played in the snow with my kids, run around tennis courts, stood to sing praises to God, bowed low to worship my God, held, hugged, laughed and cried. I have stroked away a child’s tears, I have loved my wonderful husband. I have worked to exhaustion and played until I could drop…My hands have strummed my guitar as my voice has led God’s people in worship. My hands have held rags that have wiped faces and my feet have carried me a million places…my body serves me well. It has for 48 years and it will continue to do so.
Goodness, my body is an amazing creation! The size, the shape, the lumpiness, of it really doesn’t seem nearly so significant. When I feel disdain for my body’s appearance, I realize that I am stuck in the mindset of the world and I now beg God to renew my mind so that I can have changes in my thinking.
I love my thighs…
How about you? Can you take time right now, in faith, to affirm your body, knowing that God has given each part of your body to you as a gift? Let’s ask Him to help us renew our minds and to truly delight in the amazing creation–our body–that he has entrusted to us!
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Thanks for your insights today, Heidi. Here's my struggle — The reason I have problems accepting how I look is because I'm concerned about what other people think about me when they look at me. People can be SO judgemental! This is where gossip is such a destructive thing. When we hear people gossiping about others, we think — "I wonder what they say about me when I'm not around. Does anyone else have this problem? Any suggestions as to how to get over it? I even struggle with how my husband looks at me. He is a VERY loving Christian man, who assures me of his love daily — but I still struggle with not looking pretty enough for him — particularly when I know that men are very "sight-oriented." I know I am "fearfully and wonderfully made." I can accept that, but other people may not so! How do we let this thinking go?! I'd appreciate any comments and suggestions.
Thanks for your insights today, Heidi. Here's my struggle — The reason I have problems accepting how I look is because I'm concerned about what other people think about me when they look at me. People can be SO judgemental! This is where gossip is such a destructive thing. When we hear people gossiping about others, we think — "I wonder what they say about me when I'm not around. Does anyone else have this problem? Any suggestions as to how to get over it? I even struggle with how my husband looks at me. He is a VERY loving Christian man, who assures me of his love daily — but I still struggle with not looking pretty enough for him — particularly when I know that men are very "sight-oriented." I know I am "fearfully and wonderfully made." I can accept that, but other people may not so! How do we let this thinking go?! I'd appreciate any comments and suggestions.
This coupled with yesterday's video were just what I needed. Getting ready to travel and see folks I haven't seen in a very long time. They knew me as a shadow of my former self… Lots of angst.
This coupled with yesterday's video were just what I needed. Getting ready to travel and see folks I haven't seen in a very long time. They knew me as a shadow of my former self… Lots of angst.
Heidi,I am the one who made that post in the forums. Though I am thankful that my thighs can get me where I need to go, I can't in honesty say that "I love my thighs." They really are hugely out of shape–so much so that they ache and they do really look awful. On top of that, I have vericose veins and psoriasis. I have to pretty much keep them covered. In the summer, that can be a real bummer.I really do hope for more normal sized legs one day. I carry most of my weight from the waist down. I'm realistic in that at my age, I will never have legs I'd consider nice, but it would be nice to have normal sized legs.I know I need to pray about this and let the Lord work in my heart.
Heidi,I am the one who made that post in the forums. Though I am thankful that my thighs can get me where I need to go, I can't in honesty say that "I love my thighs." They really are hugely out of shape–so much so that they ache and they do really look awful. On top of that, I have vericose veins and psoriasis. I have to pretty much keep them covered. In the summer, that can be a real bummer.I really do hope for more normal sized legs one day. I carry most of my weight from the waist down. I'm realistic in that at my age, I will never have legs I'd consider nice, but it would be nice to have normal sized legs.I know I need to pray about this and let the Lord work in my heart.
Thank you thank you, for this topic. One thing I have always despised about my own body is my thighs. As the years have gone by and a I have both packed on and taken off pounds, I find myself liking or disliking other things about me as well. God must be so disappointed that I choose to see His "good" work as so far short of my own ideal. Lord, forgive me for disdaining what you have done "good". Change my mind and heart to be filled with thanksgiving that I can move, laugh, love AND eat. Help me to do all those things to Your glory.
Thank you thank you, for this topic. One thing I have always despised about my own body is my thighs. As the years have gone by and a I have both packed on and taken off pounds, I find myself liking or disliking other things about me as well. God must be so disappointed that I choose to see His "good" work as so far short of my own ideal. Lord, forgive me for disdaining what you have done "good". Change my mind and heart to be filled with thanksgiving that I can move, laugh, love AND eat. Help me to do all those things to Your glory.
Hi, Believerkjk, This is a big struggle. I don't know that there is an easy way. I do know that when I make God bigger in my eyes, man gets smaller. When I allow man to be bigger, God gets smaller. It is hard to choose NOT to think about something. So, like if I say don't think about green gorillas or don't think about what others think, what do you think about? 🙂 The only thing that "works" for me is to take each thought captive. To choose to think about something else. SO, this is how I do this…when I DO it…if I catch myself thinking about what others think (something that can happen a lot because I am on the platform on Sunday mornings and feel very self-conscious if I don't…my weight LOSS was on display and any weight GAIN has been, too…I feel like the lights shine on my "saddlebags"…) I have a thought come into my mind and rather than chew on it and mull it over with a conversation with myself about what so-and-so must be thinking about my size change *upward* (or whatever), I literally combat it with a gratitude prayer to God.. "Thank you, Lord, that we can worship you." or "Thank you, Lord, that the concerns of my life are so light right now that this is what has my concern…wow…" or other thoughts of praise. It really does seem to make a difference for me. When I combat my concern with others view of me with praising God and giving thanks to him for who HE is and the blessings he has given me, something changes. I have had to work at this. But in the past, when I was on a worship team I would allow weight gain to disqualify me. I would quit the team or stop saying yes when asked to share music in some way. 🙁 God has made it clear that while man looks on the outward appearance and this *is* important in this world (unfortunately), I am not to allow that to direct my steps. Only God is to direct my steps. In all honesty, it is a LOT easier to write about than it is to DO! But I do hope this helps!
Hi, Believerkjk, This is a big struggle. I don't know that there is an easy way. I do know that when I make God bigger in my eyes, man gets smaller. When I allow man to be bigger, God gets smaller. It is hard to choose NOT to think about something. So, like if I say don't think about green gorillas or don't think about what others think, what do you think about? 🙂 The only thing that "works" for me is to take each thought captive. To choose to think about something else. SO, this is how I do this…when I DO it…if I catch myself thinking about what others think (something that can happen a lot because I am on the platform on Sunday mornings and feel very self-conscious if I don't…my weight LOSS was on display and any weight GAIN has been, too…I feel like the lights shine on my "saddlebags"…) I have a thought come into my mind and rather than chew on it and mull it over with a conversation with myself about what so-and-so must be thinking about my size change *upward* (or whatever), I literally combat it with a gratitude prayer to God.. "Thank you, Lord, that we can worship you." or "Thank you, Lord, that the concerns of my life are so light right now that this is what has my concern…wow…" or other thoughts of praise. It really does seem to make a difference for me. When I combat my concern with others view of me with praising God and giving thanks to him for who HE is and the blessings he has given me, something changes. I have had to work at this. But in the past, when I was on a worship team I would allow weight gain to disqualify me. I would quit the team or stop saying yes when asked to share music in some way. 🙁 God has made it clear that while man looks on the outward appearance and this *is* important in this world (unfortunately), I am not to allow that to direct my steps. Only God is to direct my steps. In all honesty, it is a LOT easier to write about than it is to DO! But I do hope this helps!
Hi, Lindsay, Oh, I understand that feeling well. Praying for you right now.Dear Kim, I hope you didn't take what I said here or on the forums as being condemning. I could see myself so much in your concerns. I really have been struggling with the new "texture" (for lack of a better word!) for my thighs! God is really working me through this. It is HARD though. Please understand–I definitely don't mean "TaDAH! Look at me! I have arrived and shame on everyone else for not!" Gosh…let me know if that is how it sounds, ok?Dear Peggy…I honestly don't think we "disappoint" the Lord. Nothing we do takes him by surprise. I think he is grieved because of what it does to *us* when we don't delight in all the blessings he bestows on us. Yes! You *are* right that thanksgiving is transforming, though! I believe that this can change us completely! It takes practice, but it is worthwhile! Hugs.
Hi, Lindsay, Oh, I understand that feeling well. Praying for you right now.Dear Kim, I hope you didn't take what I said here or on the forums as being condemning. I could see myself so much in your concerns. I really have been struggling with the new "texture" (for lack of a better word!) for my thighs! God is really working me through this. It is HARD though. Please understand–I definitely don't mean "TaDAH! Look at me! I have arrived and shame on everyone else for not!" Gosh…let me know if that is how it sounds, ok?Dear Peggy…I honestly don't think we "disappoint" the Lord. Nothing we do takes him by surprise. I think he is grieved because of what it does to *us* when we don't delight in all the blessings he bestows on us. Yes! You *are* right that thanksgiving is transforming, though! I believe that this can change us completely! It takes practice, but it is worthwhile! Hugs.
Oh, Heidi, I didn't sense any comdemnation at all. I like the honesty and openness of your blog and the forums at TW.
Oh, Heidi, I didn't sense any comdemnation at all. I like the honesty and openness of your blog and the forums at TW.
Heidi — Thanks so much for your comments and good advice. And — thanks for letting me know I'm not alone in this! I can use my list of God's attributes that I have compiled while reading your TW book blogs from last summer. If I pick a couple of His attributes each day and make them my focus, I can think about them whenever an ugly thought comes to mind. I am learning SO MUCH here! Can't wait until June 14 — considering it a birthday present of sorts. My birthday is on the 13th! You are such a blessing to me, too! I don't know how you do everything you do in a 24 hour period!! But thanks to God for giving you the strength to do it.
Heidi — Thanks so much for your comments and good advice. And — thanks for letting me know I'm not alone in this! I can use my list of God's attributes that I have compiled while reading your TW book blogs from last summer. If I pick a couple of His attributes each day and make them my focus, I can think about them whenever an ugly thought comes to mind. I am learning SO MUCH here! Can't wait until June 14 — considering it a birthday present of sorts. My birthday is on the 13th! You are such a blessing to me, too! I don't know how you do everything you do in a 24 hour period!! But thanks to God for giving you the strength to do it.
Heidi~I am also learning to appreciate my new body. While it is far from perfect(loose skin, jiggly thighs….), it serves me well. I have had a new appreciation for being healthy and in shape physically after my husband broke his back last year in sledding accident.My body is strong now for my tasks(Prov.31), not neccessarily stick thin, but where God has me to be. Truth be told…it's about 10# heavier than I'd like, but that is another story for another day. I thank God that he does not look at the outward appearance, but at the heart and He is more concerned with the size of my heart, than my thighs ;0)Looking forward to beginning the journey…Be blessed~
Heidi~I am also learning to appreciate my new body. While it is far from perfect(loose skin, jiggly thighs….), it serves me well. I have had a new appreciation for being healthy and in shape physically after my husband broke his back last year in sledding accident.My body is strong now for my tasks(Prov.31), not neccessarily stick thin, but where God has me to be. Truth be told…it's about 10# heavier than I'd like, but that is another story for another day. I thank God that he does not look at the outward appearance, but at the heart and He is more concerned with the size of my heart, than my thighs ;0)Looking forward to beginning the journey…Be blessed~
Hi, Kim. I am so relieved that it didn't come across that way. Thanks for the grace!Believerkjk – Oh yes! Exactly! That is the best way to fight off this tendency we have, as humans, to obsess about our stuff and worry about the thoughts of others. If I focus on God, it makes all the difference in the world. I am glad God us using this study in your life. Thanks for your kind words and happy birthday early! 🙂 Hope you have some fun plans scheduled!Hi, LeeAnne – Oh goodness! I hope your husband has recovered. But you are so right. Sometimes when something like that happens we develop a whole new appreciation for our bodies and health. You are so right! He cares about our heart SO much more than our thighs! LOL! Thanks for that! 🙂
Hi, Kim. I am so relieved that it didn't come across that way. Thanks for the grace!Believerkjk – Oh yes! Exactly! That is the best way to fight off this tendency we have, as humans, to obsess about our stuff and worry about the thoughts of others. If I focus on God, it makes all the difference in the world. I am glad God us using this study in your life. Thanks for your kind words and happy birthday early! 🙂 Hope you have some fun plans scheduled!Hi, LeeAnne – Oh goodness! I hope your husband has recovered. But you are so right. Sometimes when something like that happens we develop a whole new appreciation for our bodies and health. You are so right! He cares about our heart SO much more than our thighs! LOL! Thanks for that! 🙂
LOL – I must refer you back to Veggie Tales and "I Love My Lips", which is now going through my head, thank you very much….Melanie
LOL – I must refer you back to Veggie Tales and "I Love My Lips", which is now going through my head, thank you very much….Melanie
Mel! Really! I have to look that one up! THANKS! LOL!
Mel! Really! I have to look that one up! THANKS! LOL!