HEAL Week 5 Assignment

by Heidi Bylsma | Nov 9, 2009 | Blog

Here is the assignment for Lesson 5 of the HEAL study.

• Consider posting here to the blog what God has been doing in your life by hiding His Word in your heart. Have you found that it has helped you to say no to the flesh when tempted? If you decide to share here (or at your own blog), you might encourage another friend in the Lord to do likewise even without realizing it!
• Read and work through the material in Lesson 5 on pages 89-99.
• Consider responding here at the blog or at your own blog what God shows you through this material.
• Again, if you don’t have the HEAL book, consider getting it! It is a great little book!
• Evaluate: Am I accomplishing day by day the goals that God has for me spiritually, emotionally, and physically? Am I applying  myself to the Seven Practical Steps to Healthy Eating? If not, what keeps me from this? What can I do to pursue taking steps that are in agreement with what I say I believe and what I say I believe God wants for my life? (See Hebrews 12:1-4 regarding things that entangle or trip us up…)
• As you work through the material, prayerfully evaluate: Do I have an accurate view of God and His character? Do I have a biblical understanding of “grace?” What can I do to be sure I can answer yes to these questions a month from now?
• Is there anything I need to let go of? Is there anything I need to embrace?
• Do I tend to allow perfectionism and fear of failure cling to me? What do I need to do to break free of this?
• What can I do to move my body joyfully and worshipfully this week?

Friendly reminder: If you focus on God’s character during this journey and foster a posture of praise and gratitude instead of resentment about how little food it takes to truly be physically satisfied, it can radically transform your life. What will you do today to grow gratitude in your life?

Lord, please be with any who are on this HEAL journey and reading this book with us this week. I pray that we might be transformed by the renewing of our minds. I pray that we would grasp how wide and deep, high and long is the love of Christ and know without a shadow of a doubt that we can’t earn your approval or acceptance. You have given it to us freely in Christ. Change each of us I pray. In the name of Jesus, Amen.

Body Expectations…

by Heidi Bylsma | Nov 2, 2009 | Blog

What kind of expectations have we placed on ourselves? What standards do we subtly expect (or, even, demand) that we live up to?

We have a challenge before us…that of living in this world with all the messages that are constantly bombarding us about physical standards but not giving in to this…to keep our focus, instead, on what matters for eternity–spiritual values.

Lesson 4 challenges us to evaluate these things. We are encouraged to choose God’s perspective on beauty instead of the world’s ideal.

Truthfully, my thoughts about that are…it is tough to know God’s perspective of beauty unless we really spend time in His Word. We have the world bombarding us…literally…from every angle. Every window in shopping malls and stores taunt us with what beauty looks like, TV, billboards, magazines, newspapers…it is hard to escape it even if we don’t read magazines or watch TV. We want to constantly bathe our minds in the truth of what God’s view of beauty is.

David does not applaud himself for his individual design nor does he criticize God’s work.  He gives God praise for the work he has made…David recognizes the brilliance of his Creator and shouts out genuine praise and thanksgiving.  Let’s aspire to have hearts filled with praise for the awesome and unique way God has made each of us.(Smith, Halliday, HEAL, page 74)

We are challenged not to dishonor God by condemning His creation–ourselves. When we view ourselves so negatively and with contempt, we don’t accomplish anything godly whatsoever. We sadden the heart of God. He created us.

One of the best ways to learn how to walk in the truth that you are body beautiful is to talk to God about it.  Ask God to help you see yourself through His eyes rather than through the eyes of the world.  If you want to love your body, you have to fall in love with the One who made it! 

How will you, how will I, begin to combat the worldly perspective today? How will we embrace the truth about who we are and the amazing body God has designed for us? Our minds need to be renewed with truth in this. What can we practically do, today, to cooperate with God’s intention?

Take some time to follow the advice of the authors and to journal, asking God to change the way you see yourself. Spend time asking the Lord to help you to have His perspective on your body and to help you reject any way the world’s thinking affects you.

You might want to do this every day…and tenaciously cling to his promise that he can transform the way you think. Share with us here anything that he shows you!

Just Saying No?

by Heidi Bylsma | Oct 28, 2009 | Blog

…you need to be spiritually nourished. So ask God to open your heart to his presence and power as you pray and feed on His Word. Invite the Lord into your struggle, and surrender the deeper hungers of your heart to him. Ask God for the willingness to relinquish control and trust him with your needs while you obey as he directs. (Emphasis added – Smith and Halliday, HEAL, page 64)

This little statement is packed with a lot of truth!

Many of us have experienced a *life*-long struggle with eating and our weight. It is so very easy to fixate on the food and our bodies. We have become accustomed to doing this–to fixating on food and our bodies as we have over the years (though it sure hasn’t served us well, has it?).

The authors encourage us to invite the Lord to do a work within us…this is where the root of our struggle is, after all. As we release our deep hunger and our insistence that we have something NOW to fill the hole, we begin to experience what God intends…a true, more deep, solution and satisfaction for what truly ails us. Making it a daily prayer (if not more often) that we will give HIM the control in our life is so helpful in keeping a godly perspective. I love that the authors point out this two-faceted process…we trust HIM with our needs, to do *HIS* part, while we also put one foot in front of the other in obeying what He tells us to do–doing OUR part in the strength he provides.

I have hesitated posting this post to the blog. I wrote it a few days ago…If you struggle with embracing the idea of how we eat being at all related to “obeying God,” I want to encourage you to either not read the rest of this post and to spend time asking the Lord to reveal HIS truth about this, or to prayerfully continue to read. What GOD says to you is the most important. NO human should put a yoke of slavery on you.

So, while Romans 8:1 and other verses of scripture clearly teach us that there is NO condemnation in Christ…while we can know beyond a shadow of a doubt that GOD’s response to our sin is not “disapproval” or anger, it is hard for us to embrace this when all our lives we may have equated “disobedience” with incurring someone’s wrath, disappointment or disapproval. I urge you to realize…we are talking about God. He doesn’t need my obedience. He doesn’t need me! He chooses me. And he did this, Romans 5:8 says, while I was yet a sinner! Ephesians 1 says he chose me before the foundation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight–in love he predestined me! He has chosen me before I ever did anything godly or good! So I surely can’t lose that “approval” and “love” with any actions of mine. My actions didn’t “win” Him and my actions won’t “lose” Him!

So as we go on, please know that the last thing I want is for the enemy to use my words to heap condemnation on anyone. The Lord doesn’t do that!

But the truth is, in this society where we have food on demand, TV on demand and everything else with all kinds of options for what we “demand,” it is counter-intuitive to “Just Say No” to something that we want–even when it isn’t what God wants us to do. He wants what is truly best for us. He looks at the big picture. We tend to look at what will bring immediate gratification.

Romans 12:2 says that we need to refuse to be conformed to the world and, instead, be transformed by the renewing of our minds. It is no surprise that this is comes on the heels of verse 1 that urges us to offer ourselves as living sacrifices to the Lord. I must be willing to give myself to God and say no to self. In our fast-food, micro-wave, have-what-you-want culture, this is like swimming against the current!

So, let me be direct with you (and as I am, I am asking myself the same questions…):

• Do you have one particular struggle that you face as a matter of routine?

The Lord LONGS to show compassion on us!

• Is there a food, restaurant, behavior relative to food and eating that you know the Lord is calling you to lay down, but you consistently turn away from the Lord to say yes to what you want to do?

Again, I don’t ask this of us to bring condemnation, but to urge each of us to admit that we need the Lord. We need him now. His saving power can be experienced by each of us in the daily-ness of everything that seems so mundane, including our eating! But we must turn to him and in humility let him know we need him.

• Maybe he is just calling for even a baby step of faith, but even that, you refuse him in one particular area…what is it?

I know that my sweet tooth really seems to be an idol in my life. I seem to bow before it constantly. The Lord longs to be my master. His heart aches. He is not burning with anger toward me over this. His wrath about sin was satisfied in Jesus! I stand before him as approved of and loved in the beloved, but that doesn’t mean his heart doesn’t ache for me to love only him!

Again, I ask not so that we might condemn ourselves. The Lord doesn’t condemn us either (see Romans 8:1).

But he does call us to rise above the attitude of “I want what I want when I want it.” He calls us to die to self. Jesus laid down his life and he calls us to lay down the practice of…always having ____________ on the way to work (insert StarBucks or Peets Coffee beverage of choice or anything else for that matter!)…or always having the buttered popcorn at the movies…or consistently throwing up after eating…or having to end a meal with something sweet…or…anything that we think we *can’t* say “no” to…is it possible we are not at a “can’t” place, but more at a “won’t” place?

I realize again that this leg of my journey is definitely about changing my “won’ts” to “wills.” With an act of MY will, I can *will* to do that to which he calls. I can say NO to self if saying yes to self is outside of godly parameters. I can *obey* him.

For me, God has done so much healing in my life that what might have formerly been “I can’ts” have definitely shifted…now I know that, in Him and because he has healed me, I can. I must rise up and walk.

Lord, you know my heart. Please help me to have a heart turned Godward…to say no to self when saying yes is outside of your will. In fact, Lord, I desire to want what YOU want, so I can have the joy of “indulging myself” and simultaneously pleasing YOU…because I want what you want! What a joy that would be to be able to say yes to self because self wants what Lord Almighty wants! But, Lord, I really want to choose YOU during those moments when I have other ideas…I want to do this joyfully.

Chapter 9 – Feel Like Road Kill? :-/

by Heidi Bylsma | Jun 26, 2009 | Blog

Have you ever felt like roadkill? I don’t mean the kind where you can tell what kind of unfortunate animal stepped in the way of a speeding motorist, but the kind that has been on the road for days and that now is nothing but a flattened mass of gray fur barely discernible on the asphalt?

That is me this morning.

Yesterday was, perhaps, the roughest day I have had in forever. And today has begun with a continuation of yesterday’s drama because I can’t seem to let go. Replaying conversations again and again between myself and someone I care about…it is just serving to make me miserable.

Sadly, today is my daughter’s 15th birthday. I really must get over myself and not ruin her day. I can’t even give myself the luxury of processing the situation that has put me in this frame of mind.

Today, nothing is left, no one is home. I am spent. I am left scratching my mangled head (and heart) about why God seemed to have led me to do something if it was going to result in such overwhelming sadness for me and for another. Why did I feel *confidently* that he wanted me to leap into oncoming traffic if I was only going to be taken out? I thought (arrogantly, perhaps) that he was using me to run a rescue of sorts. Even as I type this, I feel a sense of “Woe is me…I am such a victim!” Good grief.

This morning, God met me in my grief. I could barely lift my eyes to look toward him. But HIS beauty is what this is about…HIS face, HIS life in me, HIS will, HIS love, HIS plan…and I must do faithfully that to which He calls and, as one wise friend recently stated, leave the response of anyone else to Him. I can grieve that she felt more led to roll over the top of me than to stop and pause and ask God what His plan in this experience was. But now it is time to peel myself off the pavement…or allow God to lift my eyes Heavenward.

What, after all, have I been crowing about here on the blog for the past few weeks?

As I opened my book to chapter 9, I was amazed yet again by God’s timing…that today, of all days, I would read these words–words I have read so many times before. Living a charmed life has some drawbacks. When I have an experience like yesterday, I feel totally unprepared, out of my element, absolutely uncertain what to do and how to move forward. So, in my previous readings of this chapter, it is fair to say, I have never been in quite the place that I was this morning.

I highlighted almost all of page 87, in fact. I want to share the words written there. I feel like the fact that God brought these words to my eyes and heart this morning shows his incredibly loving, sovereign, omniscient character:

…our current suffering isn’t the only truth upon which to focus. It isn’t even the primary truth. What our sovereign God has purposed in Heaven is more real than what we can see. “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal” (2 Corinthians 4:16-18).

We can rest assured that no suffering is wasted when it is placed in God’s hands. No single heart aches that His doesn’t ache all the more. The Scriptures teach that the Lord has a record of all our tears (Psalm 56:8). We know that Jesus wept with Mary and Martha….We know that one day our Lord will wipe away every tear from our eyes (Revelation 7:17).

God uses each and every tear we have shed and every pain we have experienced to form and mold our character, to strengthen us, and to draw us closer to His heart. He wants us to experience His strength and sufficiency. He uses our affliction to cause us to see our need for Him and our struggles with food, eating, and our bodies to send us to Him, to look for His solution. In our weakness, He is made strong. He uses even this personal battle you are experiencing and He will redeem it for His glory. (Thin Within, pages 87-88)

As you might well imagine, reading this and the following pages, encouraged my heart so very much. I felt like God was personally in the midst of my trial–He is!

I must admit, however, that in my tiredness and being overwhelmed emotionally, yesterday, I reverted to old coping mechanisms. Perhaps not to the extreme that I did in the past, but my heart was hardened and I wanted to no longer feel pain…to numb myself. I ate outside of godly parameters and drank Wild Cherry Diet Pepsi outside of godly parameters as well. :-/ I ignored the call of my Savior in these things.

The NASB renders this verse “He waits on High to have compassion on you…”

Why do I keep him waiting to show me compassion?

This morning Jesus no longer had to wait. 🙂 He met me in the quietness of my private time with him. What a gentle, loving, kind Shepherd.

At the bottom of page 89, I am asked directly, “Are you currently in the midst of a challenge or trial?” Well, yes…I am. Then, the book admonishes “Ask the Lord to reveal His purposes for allowing this trial…” Ok…so I wait. If nothing else, I am reminded yet again of how desperately needy I am for HIM. Apart from Him, I am lost.

Chapter 1 Part 2 – Free to Enjoy God’s Lavish Love

by Heidi Bylsma | Jun 5, 2009 | Blog

Well, did you have the chance to go through chapter one and highlight, underline, and/or make a list of all of the attributes of God or his treatment of you asserted by the Hallidays? I did. Let’s compare lists. I am pretty sure this is only a partial listing:

• God has a plan and purpose for me.
• He has a future and a hope for me.
• God has brought me to these pages…NOW.
• He is a “mighty Way Maker.”
• He is the Lover of my soul.
• He is the Designer of my body.
• He purchased my liberty.
• He longs for me to see his handiwork.
• His love for me is unfathomable.
• His love for me is not based on my performance *or* size.
• God transforms me.
• God is crazy about me.
• God loves me the way I am.
• God is able and willing to lead me to freedom from food rules.
• God wants authentic living for me.
• He created me to be unique.
• The Lord will meet my needs.
• He wants to free me from worry and infuse my life with peace.

Again, this is likely only a partial listing. But…wow…if I BELIEVE these things…and I am pretty sure you could find support in scripture for all of them…I wonder how my life would be different?

If we are going to make this “leg of the journey” different than what has come before…we will have to focus on the Lord, focus on the Lord, focus on the Lord.

Let us allow him to remake our view of him, too, so that our focus is not on some false image of God. Let’s beg him daily that he would helps us to fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith (Hebrews 12). We have focused on “fixing ourselves” long enough! We have tried not to think about food long enough…it is like trying NOT to think of a pink elephant! What do you think about when I tell you “Don’t think about a pink elephant?” Probably about pink elephants! So trying NOT to think about food causes us to think about it more. We have to replace our thoughts of self, food, weight, body with other thoughts! Let’s replace “diet thoughts” with thoughts of exalting our God. Let’s make this journey about getting to know him and praising the God we get to know.

Trust me…as we do, we will see transformation from the inside out. He wants our hearts…let us make room for him by kicking out thoughts of self! Let’s press on to KNOW him…the REAL him…not what others have taught us about him. Many of us have views of God that are plain old WRONG! It is no wonder we don’t want to focus on him…he is a cosmic ogre in our minds! Let us allow him to reform and reshape our view of him in TRUTH and then let us set our minds on that…on Him. Let us lift HIM up and magnify HIM instead of magnifying our “issues.”

Right now, I must confess my sisters…I don’t know if it is hormones, lack of sleep or what, but I am feeling so weary…and all about me. I want to whine right now! :-/ I disappoint me a lot! So in the list above of all of God’s attributes or treatment of me, the one that resonates the most for me right now is that His love for me is not based on my performance. I am so thankful for that.

• Which from my list or yours from chapter 1 resonates the most for you?

Let us allow these things to be what our hearts are set on today…not on an image of health, thinness, or finally having our “issues” resolved. We want Jesus…we want Him high and lifted up. As we do that…I know that I know that I know that the rest will be worked out. I think, in a very real way, this is what Jesus meant when he said:

Some other thoughts from the chapter that hit me afresh…on page 4, the Hallidays mention that we don’t want to go through this process resentfully. So often that is what we do when we diet. We should eat or not eat this or that and we hate it the entire time. How can we live like that? We can’t and don’t! (And shouldn’t!)

So, this time, we will develop a heart change…and if we make this all about God (as, indeed, it IS), then he will perform in us that which delights him…including the heart change! He transplants our hard hearts with a tender heart of flesh.

These are things HE promises that HE will do! And as he does, we will thrill to surrendering our lives, our food, our body, our minds to him!

One other important thought…Being involved with Thin Within for a long time now, I have heard many people “come and go” and some say, “I feel like quitting.” Others have said, “Oh, I quit Thin Within…”

Here is the deal…Stick with me here and I hope this makes sense…I am not sure how we can “quit” once we start…as this isn’t about our bodies or diets or about Thin Within at all! It is about pursuing Christ for all we are worth and giving him access to our hearts, our appetites, our lusts, our emptiness, our need, our emotions, our passions…EVERYTHING. This is discipleship!!! We can’t quit that. Not really.

Sure, you could stop eating 0 to 5 (and maybe that is what those people mean), but what are the options…eating when the world’s diets tell you to? So that means my body’s cues don’t matter? That God doesn’t get to have a say over my physical body, but other diet plans will? You see, this isn’t about “doing” Thin Within. This is about “doing” GOD! 🙂

I hope that makes sense–or I think it will as we go on. But if you think of this as “doing” Thin Within, I think you may be disappointed…”doing” Thin Within may not “work.” It will be like a diet.

But if you are “doing” God…well…GOD WORKS! 🙂 It gets back to that heart thing. This may seem like the long way around, but, again, we know how to lose weight (and to find it again). We want the heart change that diets don’t form in us. Only God can do that heart transplant.

Does this make sense? 🙂

More points from the reading:

…much of your eating has been triggered by something that food can’t really satisfy.

BINGO! As you “wait” for hunger (and, again, this is NOT going to be a “growl”…please don’t insist that it be a growl!!!)…turn it to waiting for GOD. Waiting ON God.

and

My soul waits for the Lord
more than watchmen wait for the morning,
more than watchmen wait for the morning.

O Israel, put your hope in the LORD,
for with the LORD is unfailing love
and with him is full redemption.

– Psalm 130:5-7

Waiting for the Lord will never leave us wanting. He WILL meet us. He WILL satisfy. This is where the wording of things is a bit awkward…If we wait for hunger, our focus is on our body, ourselves. But waiting on the Lord, our focus is on HIM. He will then say, “Guess what, dear one? Your body needs fuel now. Come and dine with Me!” Isn’t that a glorious thought? 🙂 No guilt, no condemnation, no self-focus. Then our meal time can be a time of praise and worship… “Lord, thank you for the amazing flavor and texture in this food. You are so creative! Thank you for the abundance. Thank you for supplying my needs. You are an awesome Provider! Thank you for my body that YOU have created–fearfully and wonderfully!”

Let’s DO Key to Conscious Eating #1: Today, how about if we diligently apply ourselves to this…to wait on the Lord and eat only when you are physically hungry. If you aren’t sure if you are hungry, ask Him. Don’t focus on your body by yourself (and definitely don’t obsess about it!), but take your questions about your body and how it feels to him and focus on Him and what HE says. “Lord, is this what my body feels like when it needs fuel?” He will give you a sense in your heart of hearts that “Yes, child…it is…” or not.

One final thing. The “Observation and Correction” tool is meant to be dispassionate and there will be a more detailed discussion of it in our reading ahead. If you find yourself straying…in any respect…in the way you treat your family, in something you did at work, in your eating, in your thinking or speaking…in ANY way…you can dispassionately observe. “I did _____. This doesn’t work if I want to maintain the godly goal of _____.” That is observation. Please don’t beat yourself up! That isn’t God’s way! Instead, plan a godly correction. “In the future, when that mean co-worker says she wants to meet with me, I will stop everything to pray for a moment and keep my mouth shut!” or “When my mom and I get together, I always feel so drawn to food after she leaves…I will plan some time with the Lord so that I don’t run to fridge the minute she leaves…”

It really is that simple (not EASY, but simple!).

Observe: “I get emotional when my mom comes over and eat as a response…”

and

Correct: “The minute she walks out the door, I will take a few moments to take my feelings to the Lord. I won’t even walk into the kitchen!”

None of this: “What a rotten, no good, ungodly person I am…I will be fat forever and I will probably die of a heart attack, so I may as well inhale the Oreo ice cream…”

NO WAY. None of that. We will allow God to transform our thinking and renew our minds according to His Word and He NEVER speaks to his children that way!!!”

As we continue into chapter 2 of the book, even though it is an opportunity to get to know ourselves a bit, I challenge all of us to continue making our lists of God’s attributes and how he relates to us according to the authors. See if you can add anything to your list.

I have out of town company coming today…so I am hoping to steal time away to prayerfully read chapter 2 and to blog tomorrow or Sunday. I may get behind a bit already in my blogging though! Hang in there, though! I am praying for all of us!