Leaving the familiar behind is uncomfortable, even painful. Stepping out into the unknown requires a huge leap of faith. When we dare to try Thin Within or to venture toward some other “intuitive eating” approach to managing our health (food, eating and size), this leap of faith is definitely required. We have relied upon the tools of scales, calorie (or point) counters, food labels and bathroom scales all our lives. The thought of leaving all of those tools behind is counter-intuitive, certainly! God’s invitation to trust him as we step forward into the unknown comes with a lot of uncertainty. What guarantees do we have? Only that he will show us what he has in mind…in his way and in his time.
Last week, I had a tennis match scheduled early in a town a 60 minute drive away (when there is no traffic). Warm-up time was 8:30am, so, to account for the traffic on the main highway and the plan to stop for a quick breakfast, I left at 6:30am (I am a tennis die-hard!). Conditions where I live in Cool, California, definitely weren’t ideal for a tennis match:
Everything indicated I was a nut to leave the warmth and dryness of my home to make this trek for a tennis match that might not even happen! The sky threatened to unload even more rain on an already saturated world. I had yet to receive a call or email from my team captain indicating the match was cancelled. I had a decision to make: Would I go against what made sense, travel the distance, battle the traffic, risking the possibility it might be for nothing and the match cancelled after I got an hour down the road? If I waited to leave, hoping for the cancellation call, what if it didn’t come? I might risk being late and possibly bring my team a default! NOT a good idea. So, I resolutely packed my car with my tennis gear and started down the highway, wondering if I would end up turning around.
About 15 minutes from home, I wondered…maybe this wasn’t so futile after all!
The distant horizon seemed to breathe a bit of a promise. But in the foothills, these things can be deceptive. Would the journey be worth it?
As I got on the highway about 20 minutes from my home, it was clear that the worst of the weather was behind me, but I still wasn’t convinced! Not until I got farther down the highway.
By the time I drove past Sacramento (a good 40+ miles from my house), if I looked behind me, I could see why I had wondered, but going forward…there were barely any clouds in the sky! Once to my destination town, I couldn’t believe the springlike conditions!
Having stopped for a quick bite to eat within 15 minutes of my destination, I received a text from another player on the team who lives near me in the foothills. She hadn’t left her home yet and it was, in fact, pouring rain on her end of the line. “I assume the match is cancelled?” I responded with a text joking that the opposing team might think we were nuts for even wondering given that there wasn’t a cloud in the sky down in the valley! Hard to believe that the photo above was taken just an hour and a half after I left my home where the sky was so dark and everything so wet!
Although there was no rain and the match wasn’t cancelled, we did have to do battle with extreme wind. I thought one of my teammates was going to be blown right off the court! It wasn’t for the faint of heart and I, unfortunately, lost my match in a third set tiebreaker.
But I couldn’t help but wonder if the faith required to leave the warmth of my home that morning wasn’t at least somewhat similar to what we are called to when we feel God leading us to let go of all our diets, dieting paraphernalia, beliefs about food and body weight and to join him on an adventure to trust him with our body’s signals…to eat when we sense a physical sensation of hunger, stop when we are no longer hungry, to eat foods that are “normal” and enjoyable to us and to be sensitive to the many other reasons that we feel drawn to food, going to God to have that “heart hunger” satisfied instead.
I wonder if “leaving and going” to the “land” that God has for us might not be rewarded with “almond blossoms and blue skies” like I was as I left home last Tuesday.
The return trek back to the familiar after my tennis match looked pretty unintimidating. I even had the top down in my convertible!
Thirty minutes into my drive back toward the foothills, though, I was wondering…
And by the time I was here:
…it was clear I needed to pull over and put the convertible top back up. Sure enough, I was heading back to the familiar…back to the dark, dreary, wetness.
I want to encourage you…if you are uncertain about the invitation to “leave and go”–to set aside all that you “know” about food, eating, and diets, to risk, to change, to be challenged in a new adventure with “intuitive” eating…a non-diet approach…be it Thin Within or something similar…it will be worth it. There is something waiting for you that is vastly different than anything you have experienced before. It is freedom. It may take a lot of faith to keep on the road. Doubts may assail you. Everything may seem to indicate that this isn’t “intuitive” at all! But hang in there! Victory you have longed for awaits down the road!
How about you? Are you considering Thin Within or another intuitive eating approach? What questions, doubts, fears do you have? Are you willing to give it a shot? 🙂
This blog post is actually from an email that I received. Jill Robbins shared such valuable insights with me in her email that I asked her if I could share them here at the blog and she graciously said yes! Thank you, Jill!
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A month or so ago I had decided to return to eating mindfully, but then I decided one day, that I knew best, because the weight wasn’t budging, and started counting calories.Then when that wasn’t working as I’d hoped, I started using my old weight watchers material.In the midst of all this, I heard a message on the radio about how you can lie to everyone else, but you can’t lie to yourself.I can’t lie to myself!
Back in November God called me to quit dieting and assume a proper attitude about my weight, food and exercise.I wrote it down and emailed a trusted friend so I couldn’t deny it. I’m not sure I struggle with food as comfort, though I’m sure I do at some level. I struggle most with using diets to gain control of my life.I guess I’m a control freak.I try and grab the reigns and say, “OK, Lord, I’ll take it from here.”Then I inevitably fail an beat myself up over it.
Yesterday I came across something online and it totally spoke to me.It was an article by Mary Louise Bringle.In one paragraph she states, “Diets also don’t work for the psychological/spiritual reason that we cannot heal an obsession by replacing it with a counter obsession. Compulsively scrutinizing what we may and may not allow ourselves to eat merely perpetuates our consuming preoccupation with food.”That is something I felt and knew in my soul, but I didn’t know what to do with it.She also said diets are the path of works versus grace.I totally get that!I tried to deny it by justifying in my mind that I wanted to be healthier, but really, I just wanted to be thinner.I tried to justify it by asking my husband if doing weight watchers was spiritually wrong. He looked at me, head cocked, and I think he had to suppress a laugh, but for my sake he answered honestly from his knowledge.He didn’t think it was sinful. But one thing he did say was that anything that you (or anyone) obsess over IS a sin.I left off the last piece of information and continued on my way until the guilt consumed me and I gave it again to God.I asked God to convict me. I asked him to fill me with guilt if I should not be dieting.And true to His character, he did.
I’m really not sure where to go from here.One thing I do know is that I have to make peace with the body I have right now.I have be willing to take care of my body by eating properly and exercising appropriately even if that means I will not ever be thin. I will respect my body even if it doesn’t get skinny.That’s where I think God wants me right now. I need to do what’s right even if I don’t see the fruit of my efforts, but instead look to God for my hope, my peace, my comfort.Thin is not good, fat is not bad.God is good, sin is bad.If I can focus more on that then I think I’m going to be ok.
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How about you? Do you find yourself exalting “thinness” over freedom? What do you think about what Mary Louise Bringle says in her article? “Diets also don’t work for the psychological/spiritual reason that we cannot heal an obsession by replacing it with a counter obsession. Compulsively scrutinizing what we may and may not allow ourselves to eat merely perpetuates our consuming preoccupation with food.” Thanks again, Jill!
Obedience requires sacrifice. I say NO to what I want in the moment, trusting that there is a greater reward…knowing that SATISFACTION (which sometimes will be delayed) will meet my soul, even as I refuse to grasp for instant GRATIFICATION.
Today, as I look back over yesterday, I have to say this…no, I must shout it from the rooftops!
OBEDIENCE FEELS BETTER
THAN ANY FOOD TASTES!
How about you? Will you join me today in saying NO to impulses to eat when we aren’t hungry? Will we trust that letting go of our desire for instant gratification will yet bring a deeper satisfaction–a saturation of our souls with God’s complete “enoughness?”
There can be no doubt that the past 18 months have brought uncharted difficulties in my life–like a raging sea with occasional calm:
Facing an 86 year old Mom who, one day engages in conversation and the next looks at me with confusion, and cries: “Where is mother?” Has opportunity for restoration passed?
Evaluating the ramifications of an empty nest as my “biggest fan” heads off to Wheaton College in the fall…Lord, is she ready? Have I taught her enough?
Putting the pieces of a 27-year-long marriage back together after the demon of depression had it’s way with my best friend and hero for 15 months. How can I trust again, Lord?
Wondering what will become of my socially challenged son as he, too, heads off (against his will) to Montana Wilderness School of the Bible to experience community and whatever God has for him there. Will he ever be “normal,” Lord?
And with these challenges (and more) have returned old habits that I thought (in pride) were ancient history. Apparently not. Try as I might to deny it, what I see is that I have turned back to food once again to be my “comforter.” I have turned a cold shoulder and shaken a fist at the Lord who loves me with an attitude of entitlement and rebellion: I deserve better!
I struggle with defeat.
I am supposed to be beyond this. I lead Thin Within classes! I write material for the company! Sheesh! I even have one of the best literary agents in the business and new plans for a book to help women on this journey….and yet, here I am…struggling with this…again? Or is it STILL, Lord? How can I pretend to have anything to offer others when I am here? Worse…how can YOU stand me!? I can hardly stand myself! Such hypocrisy!
I go to the Word of God. Renew my mind, Lord.
Then they cried to the LORD in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress.
He sent forth his word and healed them; he rescued them from the grave.
Let them give thanks to the LORD for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men.
~ Psalm 107:19-21
God lovingly leads me to ancient pages. Such wisdom, such love, such grace and mercy flow off of the page, dripping, it seems into the ache of my heart. Forgive me, Lord. I have looked to counterfeits for what only you can give. You alone hold the answers and Comfort I need. Thank you for your unfailing love, for your kindness and all you do for me…
Deuteronomy soothes me:
But if from there you seek the LORD your God,
you will find him if you look for him
with all your heart and with all your soul.
When you are in distress and all these things have happened to you,
then in later days you will return to the LORD your God and obey him.
For the LORD your God is a merciful God;
he will not abandon or destroy you
or forget the covenant with your forefathers,
which he confirmed to them by oath.
~ Deuteronomy 4:29-31
Today, is a day to return and obey. I have a merciful, loving God who doesn’t abandon me, even in my rebellion. He intends these trials to lead me to greater reliance on Him. Today, I will cooperate with Him. I will link arms with Him. I will walk with Him.
How about you? Is it time to take stock? Have you been using food for something other than what it is intended? Is God beckoning, wooing you back to Himself?
Come and join us for a chat on The Fight of Faith! Today at 4:30pm Pacific Time or 6:30 Central or 7:30 Eastern at http://www.thinwithin.org/chat.php I hope to see you there!
We say we understand this, yet again and again we get discouraged (or worse!) as we try to apply ourselves to the Thin Within principles; as we try again and again to live in freedom from being controlled by food, our desire eating, and carrying more weight than we feel we should. We get discouraged because we can’t seem to string together two “good” days in a row.
Let’s understand though: Our longing for perfection is a desire for Heaven! That is a GOOD thing! God has placed this longing deep within us (Ecclesiastes 3:11). But it is misguided and misdirected when we think we can and should be perfect here and now. In fact, it leads us perilously close to exalting self and a posture of pride.
Let’s STOP it!
This insistence for perfection will always lead to pride, self-exaltation, or conversely to self-condemnation. Neither side of this pendulum are the place where God wants us to land.
We need to extend the same grace to ourselves that Christ does. We need to allow the cross of Christ to be our focus and our stabilizer.
YES, grace teaches us to pursue godliness (Titus 2:11,12), but no where in Scripture are we told that the expectation is perfection this side of the grave.
Let’s relish, instead, the joy of being a human in process.
Let’s delight in Philippians 1:6 growth! That God will continue to do the work he began in us until HE completes it.
It is our job to cooperate.
If you ask people who have released weight and maintain their new healthy weight how they do it… are they “perfect” in applying the principles of eating between 0 and 5 and the other Keys to Conscious Eating, they will ALL tell you…NO, we haven’t been perfect! We still have times when we overeat, or “sneak” a taste of food before we are at 0 or even complete days where we never wait to be hungry! YES! It is true! Can you imagine? 🙂 In fact, it isn’t uncommon for “a successful person’s” weight to vacillate slightly in response to these challenges. God takes us to new levels of processing things that we thought were “over and done” and in our past! He keeps us dependent on Him sometimes by showing us just how much growth there is yet ahead.
I have been in such a season and I hope to share more about that in the days ahead. But I will tell you now that, instead of beating myself up for it (we can’t hate ourselves into positive change!), I try to take what Paul has said to heart:
Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect,
but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.
Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it.
But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,
I press on toward the goal to win the prize
for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
– Philippians 3:12-14
There are principles in this passage that apply to me in this pursuit. I don’t think the goal or prize is a thin body, though…the goal or prize is a heart given TOTALLY to the Lord, where my longing for Him far surpasses my longing for brownies fresh out of the oven, or to be a size ____ and able to wear my “skinny jeans” comfortably.
Do you need to give yourself permission today to let go of “failures?” DO IT.
Press ON.
Take HOLD.
FORGET the past.
STRAIN toward what is ahead.
Let’s refuse to indulge in the pity party stuff that we sometimes do when we are discouraged.
GRAB THIS MOMENT for the Lord!
Be FUTURE focused!
Invite him to sanctify you through and through…this is to be our goal, after all…not our skinny jeans. Welcome his invasion into the private spaces where you allow food to be your Comforter. Let him convince you that every single solitary babystep “Godward” you take on this journey is a wonderful offering to Him that delights his heart.
It is ok not to be perfect. He IS doing a work in you…that sounds pretty awesome to me.
