Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Hi everyone!
I have so many things on my heart that I want to share with you, but since I have “mom brain”, I’m having a hard time collecting some of those thoughts. But I want to write something. Anything! So I thought I would take some time to encourage you.
No matter how long you’ve been on this journey, God is STILL faithful! He watches over His word to perform it! He will NEVER leave us nor forsake us! Oh…and He LOVES us!
I know some of you are discouraged. You’ve been trying. You feel like giving up. You just don’t know how to make this all work. And some of you are down right ANGRY because you feel like you are a failure–or possibly because you may feel like God has failed you. You have spent many tears, crying out to God to just help you release the weight, to help you overcome your food addiction, to make all of this easy.
Can I tell you something?
Lean in closely…I’m about to tell you a tidbit of truth that has literally changed my life…
God wants to transform you!
He wants to help you! He wants to deliver you! He wants to help you overcome!
“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” Romans 12:2
We don’t overcome by following our boundaries perfectly. It’s clinging to God’s Word. It’s spending time with Him. That’s how we are transformed. It’s not our own work. It’s His work. Our part is spending time with Him.
I have seen a HUGE change in my life in the area of food and body image because of what God has done and all it took was me taking the time to renew my mind. What does it look like to renew my mind? For me, it means reading my truth cards at least once a day. Usually that takes place in the morning along with reading my Bible. And then each time I felt like breaking a boundary, I sat down with my journal and ‘I Deserve a Donut’ app (or book) by Barb Raveling. I would write out the questions and answers. If I was in a hurry, I would just read the questions and answer them in my head or out loud. If I was journaling, I would write down a few of the scriptures that really stood out to me. And I still do this when needed.
I believe each time I took the time to renew my mind that the Lord was transforming me. And WOW, I’m so amazed at what He has done! I will share more about that later, but for now I want to encourage you in your own journey.
“Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence,
so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”
Hebrews 4:16 (NIV)
The picture above is of my beloved Great Pyrenees, Duke, and a litter of foster puppies who raided his personal food bowl one afternoon. Duke, as you can see, was patient despite their poor judgment. Weighing just eight ounces shy of 150 pounds, Duke is immensely strong. The Pyrenees breed was created to protect flocks by being strong enough to kill any predator, even a bear. The massive chest, the powerful jaws, the legs as thick as bricks all point to an alpha male that can take down any opponent. Which is why I love watching Duke with those little puppies. Those fluffballs regard Duke as a living playground. They climb and claw and bite. Duke lets them disturb his naps, steal from his food bowl, and run away with his toys. I’ve seen them nibble on his nose and his ears, and Duke will only sigh and occasionally groan at their misdeeds.
Their foolish youthful indiscretions should put their lives in great danger. After all, Duke was bred for massive strength. Yet it is precisely Duke’s strength that keeps the puppies safe. His massive power gives the puppies a lot of leeway in their behavior. His strength gives them freedom. He is so big, and so strong, that he is not threatened when they growl or jump or bite. They can hurt him, but they can’t wound him. He is patient with them, because he’s not just powerful; he’s kind.
Yet when I sit down to pray to my heavenly Father, as I contemplate His massive power, sometimes I get nervous. My chest feels tight. My jaw muscles tense, I shift my weight in my chair. My body tenses as if to run; how can an all-powerful God be completely good? How can I trust so much power? Isn’t power similar to anger?
No. It’s not. If we’ve seen too many Hollywood movies, or if we grew up in a dysfunctional home, we may have forgotten that power and anger are worlds apart. God is powerful, but He is good. He is kind. That’s hard for me to grasp, and I’m thankful that every prayer is a baby-step to understanding God’s big, beautiful heart of love. Each prayer is a little invitation to see great power demonstrated through love. Mighty strength displayed in kindness.
Scripture tells us that this is how He wants to answer our every prayer. Psalm 119 is one of many passages that tells us God answers our prayers according to His loving kindness. Let me say that again: He will answer you with love plus kindness. Whatever you pray for today, His answer will be love. Plus kindness. If you eat past 5, if you spend past your budget, if you’ve betrayed a friend or you’re struggling with shame and regrets, His answer to you is love. Plus kindness.
Sometimes when I pray, I like to write my prayers down as if I am writing a letter to a friend. I may describe a situation or problem then ask on paper, “What is the most loving thing that could happen here? What would be the kindest thing?” When I am confronted with an action I must take, I ask, “What would love do? How would kindness act?”
I pray for everything and about everything. I have only begun to understand and believe that Love and Kindness are always the answer. Every problem and every failure needs both, and God knows we are weak. He knows we often use poor judgment, and that what we desperately need is what He has already promised. He is ready and willing to love us, exactly as and where we are. His enormous power and strength are demonstrated in His love and kindness toward our weakness. We are free to approach Him with confidence, and even boldness, because He delights in revealing how His love and kindness can transform our worst moments into His greatest miracles.
What About You?
When you pray, what do you expect? Do you fear punishment or expect love? What does your expectation tell you about your beliefs?
Think of your greatest problem or battle today. What is the most loving thing you could do? What would a great kindness be?
Can obedience be a form of kindness to yourself? When you submit to God’s ways, do you experience a freedom and joy that seem closely related to kindness and love?
I replaced the light bulbs in my bathroom this week. Two bulbs over my mirror had burned out long ago, and because of their height above the mirror, I postponed the replacement for months.
And then my husband informed me that a repairman was coming to replace our water heater. He would need access to our master bath to check his work. I immediately went to work cleaning up the bath, including replacing the lights with new, extra bright bulbs. When I hit the light switch, I saw my face in a new light, literally.
You know, the right light can change everything. It can change our priorities and choices. It can change our perceptions and immediate plans.
Let’s just say my tweezers saw some heavy action that afternoon.
This has been very similar to my experience with the boundary of 0-5 eating. It has been a bright light in my life, and what it is revealing has surprised me. Perhaps I am not who I thought I was.
Because weight loss wasn’t a major concern for me, I thought the 0-5 boundaries were a wonderful tool. Notice I said, “tool,” and not “boundary.” You use a tool when you need it. Tools are morally and spiritually neutral. They’re useful and wonderful but only occasionally necessary.
A boundary is a commitment that reflects a moral or spiritual truth. Boundaries also hint at which identity I have embraced, and what I have given authority in my life. To recognize 0-5 eating as a boundary moves its priority up in my life because it reflects what I believe to be true. 0-5 eating is not an occasional tool anymore; it’s part of my daily walk with God.
That means that my commitment to this boundary is a lifelong commitment. With diets, there is a goal and an end date. “I’m only going to lose a few pounds,” I might have said long ago. “Then this diet will be done.”
When we choose to recognize 0-5 eating as a God-honoring boundary, we’re committing for life. Weight loss is not the goal; submission is.
As I make daily eating choices based on the truth that God is my ultimate authority, I find His light growing stronger and brighter. I have found, much to my surprise, that not everything is really what I once thought. When faced with conflict in the past, I fought for what I wanted, and what I thought was right. Today, however, I recognize that submission to God’s leading is the quickest route to inner peace, and inner peace is more valuable to me than winning a fight. I can trust God to work things out in His own time, and my “assistance” is often not required.
Choosing 0-5 eating as a boundary has changed a lot of things for me and I have begun to realize I am capable of big changes. I can do new things, and in new ways. Submission and obedience are tough but tender teachers. I have found a peace I didn’t know was available. I’ve learned that my real strength comes from surrender. And that God can surprise us all at any moment in our journey, leading us somewhere bright and new.
What About You?
Do you think of 0-5 eating as a tool, or a boundary? Do you think there is a difference for you?
When you consider the words “surrender” and “submission,” what is your first reaction? Is it pleasant or negative?
If you lost all the weight today that you wanted to lose, would you still continue with the 0-5 eating guidelines? Why or why not?
[Editor’s Note: Rebecca is one of the participants in our 2014 Thin Within Workbook Bible Study. When she posted these thoughts on Day 1, I couldn’t resist asking her if I could share it with you all. I hope you are encouraged as I am. Oh…and for the record, Rebecca’s precious hubby gave his consent for this to be shared with the world. lol!]
“For I know the PLANS I have for YOU,” says the Lord,
“PLANS to prosper you, not to harm you, PLANS for a HOPE and a future.”
Jeremiah 20:11
I emphasized plans and hope for a reason. I love my husband dearly, but the man stinks at planning…anything. I am always so disappointed when I ask for a date night and, after eighteen years of knowing each other and almost fourteen years of marriage, he still doesn’t take the clue to actually plan something. Instead it always ends up with the whole, ‘I don’t know, what do you want to do’ conversation.
But God spoke to me this morning that He, God, does have a PLAN! That makes me giddy! I mean, if my husband said to me, “Come on, we’re going out, I’ve got a plan” I would swoon. If there is a plan, that means there has been thought, preparation and consideration all for me.
God has been thinking about me, about you, about what we like, what He’s gifted us with and for, and even what we don’t like. And in those thoughts, He’s made PLANS for us! Good plans! Great plans! I want HIS PLANS!
God has shown up for our ‘date’ if you will, our journey for the next 12 weeks and said, “Let’s go, I’ve got a plan.” All we have to do is get in the car and allow Him to take us where He will. And what an awesome hope that brings! Hope is the confident expectation of good. God’s not going to take you bowling when you really love the outdoors and would rather be at the beach. He knows us intimately and we can trust Him. We can trust His plans. We can place all our hope in Him.
Rebecca Bryan and her husband live in Grand Rapids, MI where they homeschool their 3 children and she is a worship leader at her church. Rebecca is also a singer/songwriter who just released her debut album, Bound by Love.
How About You?
How does it encourage you to know that God has purposed, considered, been intentional about the plans he has for you? Will you choose to believe him for it today? What thoughts are here that you can turn into truths in your deck of truth cards … to renew your mind with?
There are times when I feel such frustration with myself—the struggle that Paul shares in Romans 7 about the very thing he doesn’t want to do is that which he keeps on doing and the good that he wants to do he doesn’t. There are times when I am frustrated by others or my circumstances. Times when I feel despair and such a lack of hope. At times like these, I wonder how I will ever see my way clear. Hope is elusive!
It is times like these when one thing…and one thing alone…changes EVERYTHING for me.
In fact, the biggest changes in my life—my eating, my other stronghold struggles, my relationships—have happened when I have integrated this one thing into my life.
It’s praise.
I believe that so often those of us who struggle with eating and eating disorders have an extreme case of self-focus. I know I do when I am left to my own devices. Dieting definitely contributed to me being this way…and sometimes, over the years, I have turned Thin Within into being less about honoring GOD and exalting him in all I do into being .all about me, my food, my hunger, my body, me me me, my my my.
This doesn’t result in anything but more despair and struggle.
When I move my focus from ME to the Lord, it is amazing what happens.
We were created to worship him, to exalt him. When I am doing what I was created to do, my spirit soars, hope floods even the darkest parts of my mind and heart and I experience a change…now. There is something wildly wonderful about exalting my Creator, my God, my King.
This week, I have been struggling with some circumstances in my life and I was reminded ever so lovingly by my Heavenly Father that I hadn’t been praising as much. So, I recommitted to this as a daily practice. In fact, as part of the “Set Your Timer” Challenge, I praise! How awesome is it to praise God—even if ever so briefly—for a moment every hour!
I recorded one of my praisefests in case it can encourage you as you do your own. As I listened to it, I realized that you can actually tell that I am experiencing a lifting of my spirit as I go farther on.
Can you develop or add to a God List (this post at my other blog tells you about it if you haven’t seen me talk about it before) and then use it for your own praisefest? If not this, then how about opening to a favorite psalm and giving it a shot? 🙂 Just ask the question, “What is God like and what does He do for people?” and then say back to God what you find!
