Sometimes, it can be helpful to have someone else share about the topic that I beat to death here at the blog. Bob has a refreshingly “bare bones” approach to many of the same issues that I use way too many words to describe. In this short video, Bob cuts to the chase about “The Myth of More.”
1. What mindset do you have about food? Do you have a mindset that is conducive to realizing your “weight loss” goal? (That is what Bob talks about most of the time since that is his primary focus for using the principles of Thin Within.)
2. Have you accepted the fact that you may never be able to eat food in the quantities that you might always want to and get to/remain at a healthy weight?
3. Are you willing to eat in the quantities it takes to get and maintain a healthy weight?
4. Do you like food more than you like the thought of being a healthy weight?
5. Have you found yourself rationalizing (justifying) eating more for “just one meal?” How often does that happen for you and does what Bob has to say about that make sense? What will you do with that?
God is leading us into battle. He is our Conquering Hero and he leads us in a triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads EVERYwhere the fragrance of the knowledge of him (2 Corinthians 2:14). Let’s put on the full armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-18).
We are perfectly prepared for this. We have had four weeks of laying the ground work. We have our boundaries in place. We have a plan for renewing our minds. We have exposed the subtle deceptions involved in “Justification Eating” and “Entitlement Eating.”
This week, we are going to plunge even deeper smack into the heart of the overeating issue. We do this, even though this is the time when many of us might be tempted to take a break.
Rather than head for the hills, the swimming pool, or a good fiction book, let’s GO AFTER THIS THING. Let’s go for the jugular and deal the DEATH BLOW so that the rest of our study is just icing on the cake (so to speak!).
Unlike Saul against the Amalekites, we are going to obey our God and take NO prisoners. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, we have divine power to demolish strongholds (2 Corinthians 10:3-5). will utterly destroy anything that condones apathy, overeating, associating copious quantities of food with “fun,” “fellowship,” and mood management.
We are more than conquerors in Christ (Romans 8:37). Like Gideon hiding out in a wine press, though it may seem unlikely, we are mighty warriors in Christ (Judges 6:12). We can scale any wall. We can stand on the heights! (See Psalm 18:29-36) It is time for us to put on who we are in Christ — who He has made us to be — and totally, 100% act like who we were born in Christ to be!
To do this, we need two things:
1.) To be honest. I know you already have been and I celebrate that! This week, we may peel back some of those “layers of the onion” and discover there is more to face into.
2.) To work hard. Again, I know you have been working hard. Thank you for that! Many of you are experiencing the NEW THING that we are promised God is DOING! Sometimes we don’t perceive it, but he IS DOING a new thing–right now. Let’s not lose any momentum right now. Let’s resolve to PRESS ON THROUGH!
As we have continued in our study, I realized that one VITAL thing we have to deal with is:
Why has overeating/food/body image been a stronghold in our lives for so long?
Why is it so stubborn?
No matter how extreme the measures are we take, we often continue to have a challenge at one level or another.
This week–if we persevere and do the work involved–will be transformative. So I apologize in advance. This week has probably the heaviest amount of homework of all the weeks (I didn’t see this coming, but sense God’s leadership in this). If you can carve out the time to do it, I believe it will be worth it!
First, to lay the groundwork for this week’s assignment, here is this week’s video. It is sort of a broad overview and, in it, I mention (again) the value of 1.) Creating a God List 2.) Using your God List for a Praise Festregularly 3.) Building an attitude of gratitude and 4.) Creating and using Truth Cards. So if you haven’t already, you may feel nagged in this video. Here it is:
The video this week is a bit different in that it doesn’t directly hit on the material I cover in the assignment. In a broad sense it does, but not specifically.
So, without further ado, Let’s DO IT! I want to ask a question:
What is it that is the issue here?
When we boil it down, why is having a tiny little portion of food–which is really all we need to be sustained–not enough?
Why is it that we want *more*?
What is it that is true when we want *more*?
Think with me about this…cookies come out of the oven. I am free to eat them when I am hungry. Why is it that two cookies isn’t enough? Is it because I am hungry? Or is it just because I want the taste of… more?
Out to eat at the Mexican restaurant…do I really need a second basket of chips before my meal is served? Why isn’t one basket enough? Or 5 chips enough (when followed by the entrée, rice and beans)? Do I really need more?
Why isn’t a coffee cup full of ice cream enough? Why do I reach for seconds? What am I looking for? More…
The Myth of MORE
I believe that The Myth of More is the heart of this issue. I want more food. More fun. More time. More money. But since we are in the context of food, overeating, body image, let’s address the More Myth relative to food.
But more is never enough.
The last bite still happens. And I still grieve. I want more.
Is it fair to say that this is greed?
The definition of greed is, simply, excessive desire. I don’t know about you, but I think that fits what I struggle with relative to food. While I have definitely begun dealing with this much better in the years since 2006, it continues to be an insistent “whine” in my life. Always there. Buzzing in my ear. Harassing me. More. I need more.
Ok, now comes the gut-punch. Ready? Before I share it, let’s remember some truth:
God did not send His son into the world to condemn the world, but so that the world might be saved through him. (John 3:17)
God demonstrates His own love for us in this, that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us–the ungodly! (Romans 5:8)
There is NO condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. (Romans 8:1)
He chose you and me before the foundation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us…even before we did a single, solitary godly thing! (Ephesians 1…all of it!)
If we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us of ALL unrighteousness! (1 John 1:9)
So now I hope you are ready for the gut-punch. Don’t let Satan stand and accuse you. Send him packing. Right now.
That’s right…the Myth of More is just a nice way of being idolaters. OUCH, right? I know! Seems so harsh.
But if our eating is at all indicative of greed and if greed is idolatry…well, the old if a = b and b = c, then a = c has to be true, right? Maybe? So our eating aside from physical need seems to come from the Myth of More…greed…hmmmm….
I will leave you with that and Barb’s material to chew on this week. I do hope you will talk about this here in the comments. I am sure we have a lot to talk about relative to this!
ASSIGNMENT broken down for you by days because it is so much. SORRY! I think this is important!
1. TODAY (Monday): Read and do Barb’s quiz to evaluate if you do, in fact, have an idol operating in your life. Try to do it with food, overeating, dieting, “thin” in mind. If you feel so inclined, share with us what you discover here in the comments. I know that is a bold move, but I do believe there is something powerful about facing our truth and stepping into the light with it–talking about it. It loses it’s power when we do that. Or it is weakened considerably.
2. Tuesday: Read and do the activities in Barb’s post on “How to Break Free from Idolatry.” You will have already done her steps under How to Break Free From Idolatry #1, 4, 5 and maybe even 6, getting an accountability partner. If you haven’t yet gotten an accountability partner, you may want to do that this week. Post at the Accountability page. Don’t worry about #s 2 and 3 as you will do them this week in another part of the assignment. Journal your responses to Barb’s question: How is idolatry like adultery? How is it different? How would you get over idolatry in a way that would be similar with getting over adultery?
3. Wednesday: Read and do the activities in Barb’s post on “How to Break Free from Idolatry Part 2.” Respond to her questions for your journal. Respond here to her question: “How do you convince yourself your idol needs to go?” I want to add…REALLY go? I mean, you are participating in this study because you want to see some changes happen. YAY! Let’s celebrate that. But I know some of us struggle with cherishing some little aspect of our idol that keeps us from totally letting it go. It can be in the form of that final sweet in the evening no matter what. Or it might be in that but I amentitled feeling we have when the kids go to bed. We may even plan for what we will do after they are in bed without the thought of 0 and 5. Do you see what I mean? Do you cherish any little aspect of eating outside of physical need, even just a bit?
4. Thursday: Two of Barb’s studies are on tap for today or, you can save part of this for the weekend. Read and respond to When You Don’t Feel Close To God. This post probably feels familiar as I covered some of the material in it last Friday here. It is worth considering again, certainly. Consider her journal/prayer activity in this post, too. What might be reasonable for you to do to take some focused time to work on this? Try to squeeze in time to read and journal through Barb’s post on Idolatry in the Bible. I was very convicted over this statement…in reference to some things not looking like idols, Barb said, “…but if we’re consistently turning to them for comfort, protection, fulfillment, and deliverance from life’s problems, they’re probably idols.” When you consider her last question “Do you think idolatry is accepted in the church today?” you might want to consider church potlucks, all-you-can-eat pancake breakfasts, spaghetti feeds and the like. What would happen if we stopped chowing down at church? Have we been trained by our church involvement that “fellowship” and food are synonymous?
5. Friday: Read and complete the activities in Barb’s Post on “How to Set Boundaries to Break Free From Idolatry.” Much of this material will be familiar to you. You might use this as an opportunity to evaluate your secondary boundaries to see if there aren’t any that you have been “overlooking” using 🙂 to help you to be more aware of your primary boundary of eating within physical hunger and satisfaction.
6. Here is the recording from this week’s online class.
When I was a young girl, if a boy had my heart, I would write his initials and mine inside a heart. Putting this declaration on the front of my school folder or book-cover (made with a brown paper grocery sack) seemed to somehow make my intentions more intense–more true–more powerful.
I have never had my initials carved on a tree trunk that I know of, or a marriage proposal engraved on a tree trunk, though twice I have been proposed to by water–once by the river (by the man I married) and once at the California coast (by the man I didn’t). Both men knew that I wouldn’t take favorably to carving the proposal into a tree trunk (unless the tree was already dead), I suppose! LOL!
Though now, I suppose I might look at the declaration of love as more intense, more meaningful, more powerful had it been carved into a stately oak or poplar tree. True confessions! It certainly would stand as a monument to refer back to later in the marriage, wouldn’t it? A great way to remember youthful longing and dreams for what could be. Sigh! 🙂
I want to urge you again…evaluate if eating 0 to 5 is something that God is calling you to do and then if you are convinced–convicted–in your heart that it is, jot that truth down and then date it so you have it as a touchstone, a point of reference, to return to when you waver. It is a declaration of your intent!
Barb Raveling has asked a challenging question at her blog and, today, I ask you: “What is Your Commitment Level?”
Are you committed to this for now…are you “trying on” 0 to 5 eating and, as long as it feels good, you might keep at it?
Are you not quite even to that point yet, but only just now considering trying 0 to 5 eating?
Are you pretty committed–as long as it doesn’t take any more work than sticking with a diet?
Or are you committed as long as the scale shows results right away and every day?
Are you committed to 0 to 5 eating because of some deeper reason than weight loss? Maybe because you are sure God is calling you to moderation and you know this is the path he has for you no matter what?
Are you committed so that even when you fall off the horse you are going to get back on again–for the rest of your days on this planet?
As you can well imagine, the willingness to work at 0 to 5 eating will vary depending on the commitment level and that commitment level may be affected by if you are sure God has called you to it and what your commitment level to God is!
Several people who are convinced that this is God’s call for them have shared with me that they consider the commitment to 0 to 5 eating similar to the commitment in their marriage–they know that it won’t always be easy. In fact, sometimes, it might be downright UG-LEEEEE! They know that at times they may want to just throw in the towel as that would be easier. But they also know they just will never quit. Period. End of conversation. It is a non-negotiable.
While it is definitely possible to “over spiritualize” everything in our lives, including our eating and use of food, I also think that when you look at significant events in history in the bible and how many of them had food as a pivotal part of the scene, it certainly seems to be something that God values. We need look no further than the third chapter of Genesis before we see that a lack of commitment to godly boundaries relative to food had dire consequence!
Thoughts for Consideration:
1. How about you? Have you sensed the 0 to 5 eating is something that God has called you to? Jot it some place that you can record it with the date. If it helps, draw a big ol’ ink heart around it! 🙂
2. What is your commitment level to 0 to 5 eating? Refer to one of the options mentioned above or come up with your own and jot it down. Evaluate if you are happy with your commitment level or if you want to “woo” a greater commitment to moderation in all things relative to eating. Journal about this.
3. If you want to “woo” a greater commitment to 0 to 5 eating, you might consider creating a truth card (or a list) of all the benefits of 0 to 5 eating. On another truth card, you can list truths about dieting (don’t forget the truth that dieting DOES work to help lose weight, but include the other truths, too!). Another card, you could list truths about eating whatever you want, whenever you want, in the quantities you want. Give these lists of truths some careful, prayerful consideration.
4. You may need to go even deeper. Commitment to anything is pretty empty if a commitment to God is weak. Where do you stand relative to your relationship with Jesus? Are you willing to go wherever he calls you?
One of my most difficult challenges over the years–the years of my ever-escalating weight and even the six years of being at a healthy size–has been when my husband goes out of town. I have spent lots of time journaling, praying, and pouring out my heart to God about this particular struggle. But deeper, darker, root issues aside, the bottom line is, while it isn’t as big a challenge as it once was, I have habitually turned to ice cream…lots of it…to make myself less lonely, less sad…less…less…well…less whatever. I have turned consistently over the years to the lie that food was what I needed in those moments. I really have, over the years, made the lie my refuge and falsehood my hiding place.
But it hasn’t stopped there. As we discussed in our online class yesterday as we addressed David’s cover-up of his adulterous affair with Bathsheba, during those times when my husband has been out of town and he knew there was ice cream in the house…if I didn’t “cover my tracks,” I knew I would be busted. If he knew we had a half gallon of ice cream when he left and I ate my way through most of it, I simply couldn’t have him discover the evidence of my gluttony…so I had to finish it off and go buy a new half gallon so that it would appear that I had been virtuous while he was gone–as if I had abstained completely from ice cream. Or be sure I bought some after he left and finish it before he returned. I knew he wouldn’t ask me about it, so it wasn’t like a downright lie, but it was definitely making a falsehood my hiding place.
The other really weird piece to this is, it isn’t like my husband has ever been my food cop. He never has acted disapproving of my weight or my eating, but has always been affirming and loving (or at least that is how I remember our history together). I think I have projected my upbringing…the upbringing of living in a home where I DID sneak food and DID live a lie about food … all over onto my relationship with my husband now. Does that make sense? What this does is make this “refuge” and “hiding place” thing even more of a lie and falsehood than it already was.
It gets complicated sometimes, but that’s the way it is about lies. I am convinced that if things (like explanations for why I do what I do) are complicated, it might be a good indicator that there is a BIG lie at the heart of it. God’s TRUTH is simpler. Easy to swallow? No. Not necessarily. But definitely simpler. That’s the thing about truth…it is so much simpler.
As I have looked at this history with ice cream, my justification/entitlement eating, and the downright deception that I have woven to protect the “precious,” it sickens me. I am so thankful for a loving, gracious, kind, merciful God who waits to show me compassion.
Thoughts to Consider:
1. Does my story resonate with you? Can you identify in some way with the lie being a refuge for you or falsehood being a hiding place? Take some time to journal about it.
2. What is the TRUTH? I want to take the lies that I tell myself and replace them with God’s truth. Will you do this with me? For me, I will create a truth card about these things:
What is the truth about my husband’s trips away from home? If something happens to him, what then? (Contrary to what I have thought, I know I will survive!)
What is the truth about my security in Christ?
What is the truth about where my greatest protection and comfort is found?
What is the truth about ice cream? (Yes, I even include the truth that ice cream tastes good…I wouldn’t hide myself in it if it wasn’t pleasant! We don’t need to fear the truths that are also favorable about our lies/falsehoods! But including ALL the truth is important!)
3. I want to sit with the Lord and ask him what the root of this is. What I mean is what makes me feel like running away, hiding away, escaping in the first place? What is GOD’s solution to this? He wants to be my hiding place, but what will that look like? You may want to ask yourself these questions, too, if my admission reminds you of yourself in some way.
We have all experienced temper tantrums. Usually, the context is our kids’ attempts to get their way…or maybe it’s someone else’s kids. 🙂
But have you ever wanted to throw a temper tantrum? Or forget the “wanted to throw” … have you ever just plain ol’ pitched a royal fit? (Or maybe you aren’t like me? LOL!)
God works with me in themes and today’s theme seems to be “temper tantrums.” It has hit me from several sources…and, if I am honest, I am throwing one very UGLEEEEEE, giant temper tantrum all over the place today. (But that is another story, with the telling best left for another decade.)
An epiphany just hit me…as I was typing this post, I mis-spelled “temper” and it came out on the keyboard:
TempTer Tantrum
Interesting. I don’t need to wonder long in the context of my own “TempTer Tantrum” to know that the Tempter–ol’ Satan himself–likely laughs with glee as I “indulge” in pitching my fit. TempTer tantrums have entitlement and justification written all over them!
This morning, my husband stumbled out to the deck where I was having my quiet time. He was groggy, rummy, bleary-eyed and somewhat sleep deprived, I guess. Some of his first words were, “I don’t feel like eating 0 to 5 any more…”
Having my iPad handy, I invited Bob to have a seat, then tapped “record.” The following sound byte is the result. Don’t be awed however…this was actually a conversation that took the better part of a half an hour. I have whittled it down to three and a half minutes. You will see where Bob started with his temper tantrum…and where he ended.
Adriane also mentioned a temper tantrum in her most recent Sound Cloud file. I thought I would share it with you as well. Thanks, Adriane, for being so real! I love how she intends to use this file to remind herself of just how AWFUL it feels when we GIVE IN to a tempter tantrum!
(Email subscribers will probably have to come to the blog site in order to take advantage of the sound files. It is worth it! Come on over!)
Questions for Your Consideration:
1. Can you relate to having what Adriane calls “an adult temper tantrum?”
2. You might want to spend some time truth journaling what you feel when you throw a temper tantrum. What are the reasons you are most likely to pitch your fit? Use what you journal to make a truth card or two. Lots of things in Adriane’s Sound Cloud file would make an excellent truth card.
3. What is true about your temper tantrums? (Does it make you feel better? Closer to God? Solve a problem?)
4. What is true about what you are entitled to? (You might want to consider this from God’s perspective. Check out Romans 3:23 and Romans 6:23a.)
5. In what ways has God chosen to bless you?
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Note: Don’t forget to register for today’s webinar if you plan to come. It is at 3pm Pacific Time (5pm Central, 6pm Eastern). Info below:
Please register for Entitlement Eating – Thin Within Support – Week 4 Renewing of the Mind on Jul 10, 2013 3:00 PM PDT at:
“I deserve the good life!” “Life should be fair!” “I deserve to never ben sad or uncomfortable and if I am any of these things, I will use food to make me feel better because it is my right!”
Many of us have experienced feeling these things. Some of us may even live by this sense of entitlement. If we do, chances are we will never be consistent in our Thin Within efforts to eat between the parameters of 0 and 5 (or hunger and satisfaction).
What is God’s view of this attitude? What are we to do instead? How?
This week, we talk about these things. Come on along. The price is $0 for another week!
After registering, you will receive a confirmation email containing information about joining the webinar.
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Entitlement can be something we *learn*! Some of these thoughts we want to recognize may be “left overs” 🙂 from our dieting days. Two of these are:
1.) Snacks don’t count
2.) I am entitled to eating/drinking artificially sweetened foods/beverages all day without consequence (in dieting, we actually thought this was virtuous! I hate to burst your bubble now!)
Here is a sound byte from Sound Cloud. I hope this helps! 🙂
1. Do you sometimes pop something in your mouth but don’t “consider” it a meal if it consists of certain foods or is only a couple of bites of something?
2. If so, do you see any lie lurking in the belief that this doesn’t count? What would “renewing your mind” look like in this situation?
3. Have you ever found yourself shaky without sensing an earlier hunger signal?
4. Is there any chance that you are using artificial sweeteners (gums, mint, beverages) inbetween meals? If so, do an experiment…consider not using any for a day and see if your hunger signals become “more polite” and more manageable. 🙂
5. Consider any ways that God is drawing you into deeper intimacy with him. Spend some time thanking him for that fact. 🙂
Bible Verse to Ponder:
…we have made a lie our refuge and falsehood our hiding place. – Isaiah 28:15b
What lies have you found refuge in? In what falsehood have you hidden away in, safe from the emotional tidal waves of life? Are you like me, trying to hide from the wounds of life behind a carton of ice cream or within the confines of a candy bar wrapper?
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NOTE:
I will be trying to keep this page – Renewing the Mind Study – updated with links, including registration links for the online classes.
This week, the online class on Entitlement Eating is on Wednesday at 3pm Pacific Time. Please register by clicking here.
Next week, I will be offering the class for our Renewing of the Mind Study on THURSDAY, July 18th at 4pm Pacific Time. Please register by clicking here.
