Author Mary DeMuth posted this at her blog. I share it with you because I believe this is at the heart of much of what we perceive as “failure” in our pursuit to give our eating and our hearts to the Lord. Read and then I would love to know what you think. Does this affect you at all? I know it does me.
Mary is an author and her perspective may not be yours precisely, but consider if there are ways in which you can identify with what she shares. Thanks!
On the Thin Within forums, we have had a discussion about why we overeat.
See how many of these you can relate to.
Well, you get the drift, I bet! 🙂
Some of the women at the forums have mentioned that there are some bad habits–like, perhaps:
Again…you get the drift.
Finally, as we are honest with one another and ourselves, we might sometimes simply feel like this:
I like food. I want it. I will eat it just because I want it and I like it.
I would like to suggest something, though.
What is really behind this? I mean, if we eat for all these reasons and more, even though we know that it might be killing us (when it is), what is really behind it all?
Is it possible that, if we were to dig a bit deeper we might come up with some answers that might lead to our healing?
What do you think?
I would love to hear from you about this.
If you have health issues that are due, indirectly or otherwise, to overeating, what is at the heart of continuing to overeat?
Why do we do this?
“You can get a WHOLE sandwich AND a soda for just a dollar fifty more!,” the woman behind the counter proudly disclosed.
A bit taken aback by the assertiveness of the deli-counter clerk, my daughter quietly replied, “No thank you.”
“Are you SURE? Do you KNOW how SMALL half a sandwich IS?” Deli Lady looked at me for support. None was forthcoming.:-)
“Yes. It will be fine. Really.” Michaela smiled weakly.
Deli Lady looked at Michaela and back to me with incredulity…back to Michaela again: “All ri-i-i-ight then. A half really *isn’t* much food…”
I asked Michaela after we left the store how it made her feel to have Deli Lady be so insistent. She said that she gets that sort of thing almost every time she buys her (half) sandwich there. I know that folks are trying to be helpful.
Isn’t it odd, though, that we have become a society that generally needs to be told how much food constitutes a meal? Fast food restaurants are famous for this with their “meal deals.” Portions at regular restaurants are huge.
We have been trained to think we need to eat more food to be satisfied. It is no wonder that we seem somewhat unwilling when a program (like Thin Within) promotes eating (a lot) less food. We have become convinced that we must need copious quantities of hearty foods to live.
Truthfully, even if we live a relatively active life, we may not need that much. Our bodies are amazingly efficient. And it is strange that if we stand up (even politely) and say “No thank you,” people look at us like we have grown a third eyeball. 🙂 It does make it challenging to maintain personal boundaries. It isn’t just friends and family members who want us to eat more! Who would have thought we would need a boundary with a Deli Lady–a relative stranger?
Truthfully, I know Deli Lady meant no harm by it.
In a way, I guess I am convicted, even. Deli Lady was very zealous about the great deal she wanted to let us in on.
I don’t just have a great sandwich and soda deal to share. I know the Bread of Life. I know the One Who is true nourishment for the heart and soul. Yet do I ever get nearly so earnest about “You need to have this!” as the Deli Lady was about the great Meal Deal she told us about?
Hmmm…food for thought.
Today, how about we crack open your bible for 5 minutes and find 3 characteristics of God–three aspects of his character that we can praise him for. Then take time just to praise Him and thank him for being Who He is.
Here is my example (I have done more than three, though), meditating on Psalm 48:
Lord, I praise you for your greatness. I know I can’t even begin to fathom your awesomeness. You are so very worthy of all my praise. May my life be a praise to you. Thank you that you create beauty and joy. I praise you that I can run to you–you are my fortress, my protection, my shelter from the storms of life. You alone can make me secure. Though I look for security in so many things, you alone are the source of rest, peace. Oh, God! I can’t even begin to fathom your unfailing love. Thank you that you LOVE. Thank you that it is UNFAILING. I praise you that you never allow anything I do or say keep you from loving me. I praise you that you are righteous. A powerful God without righteousness would be frightening. You alone judge purely and perfectly. I can rest in knowing that what you decide is perfect, wise and true. I am glad in this truth, Lord. Thank you that you care about me enough to be my guide, Lord. May I praise you this day with all that I am. In the Name of Jesus, Amen.
To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations,there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me.Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me.But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you,for my power is made perfect in weakness.”Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses,so that Christ’s power may rest on me.That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses,in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.For when I am weak, then I am strong.– 2 Cornthians 12:7-10
#1 – My kids fight. A lot. I am told this is “normal.” They are teenagers. But this causes me to NEED God to make it through my day. You see, I was raised in a chaotic, tumultuous household. I have been running from conflict since I left my parents’ home. I can’t stand yelling. I want to run. In order to stay in the present moment, in order to be a Mom to my kids, in order to shepherd their hearts even as they fight about the piddliest things, I need the Lord. I need to depend on Him. I need to pray earnestly for help, strength, and wisdom.
Maybe that is the point.
#2 – Eight years ago, we moved from a Sacramento suburb to a town on the other side of a canyon, six miles down a winding road with steep drop offs on one side and sheer mountain on the other. There is no shoulder to speak of and no place for “driver’s error.” I am convinced that 99.9% of the people that drive this road are from another country, where driving on the left side is protocol. Never mind that we are in the United States where, last I checked, the rule was to drive on the right. So, when the 99.9% aren’t driving in the wrong lane, they seem to take their half of the road out of the middle. I remember well the first year we moved up here. I knew at that time that I needed God to safely navigate through the canyon each time we wanted to find civilization (grocery store, Wal-Mart, etc.). I jokingly said that God moved us to the country on the other side of the canyon to teach me to be a woman of prayer. I never prayed so much!
Maybe that is the point.
#3. My battle with food, eating, my obsession with my self and my body continues. Even after all this time of laying this down, laying this down, laying this down…and did I say, laying this down? Even after all this time, I need the Lord desperately in order not to give in to fleshly lusts any time–all times–of the day or night. I am not kidding. I used to wonder when I would be “normal.” I think it is Barbara Johnson that says “Normal” is a setting on the dryer. Period. There is no “normal” other than that. This IS my “normal.” I need God to manage this struggle. I have to pray.
Maybe that is the point.
There is a theme here.
I am weak. He is strong. Through prayer, I am acknowledging my weakness, my need, my lack and his sufficiency, his strength his provision.
Maybe that is the point of these three “issues,” and the other 39,083 that I haven’t listed here. 🙂
How about for you? Are there weaknesses, struggles, heartaches that might be in your life specifically for the purpose of bringing you to your knees?
I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance.I know that you cannot tolerate wicked men,that you have tested those who claim to be apostlesbut are not, and have found them false.You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name,and have not grown weary.Yet I hold this against you:You have forsaken your first love.Remember the height from which you have fallen!Repent and do the things you did at first.~ Revelation 2:2-5a
Jesus did a “one thing” seven times in the book of Revelation, chapters 2 and 3. Seven different groups of people, seven “one things,” using just a few sentences for each. His heart laid bare.
Here, in these pages of Revelation, he invites me to find principles indicating what might be on his heart, if he were to say “one thing” to me.
“You have forsaken your first love.”
Hard working, persevering, intolerant of wickedness, enduring hardships for Christ–such a “straight and narrow,” “good” little group of Christians… and yet, these great things had become dos and don’ts, shoulds and “had betters.”
Even with all my dutiful rule keeping, he longs for my heart to be his. Do I, like the church in Ephesus to which this is written, no longer nurture the heart of love for the Lord that motivated me in the earliest days of my faith? Has it grown cold?
How many of my pursuits are from a heart that is deeply in love with my Savior? There is a place for shoulds and “had betters,” but I want even those to be because I love the Lord.
Oh, Lord! Stir in me that first love sort of love once again! Never let me forget the love that motivated me to tell everyone that I had met you…that you had saved me. The love that made me shout from the top of the mountain (on horseback) “I LOVE YOU, JESUS!!!!”
Do I pander after “thin” or “fit” or __?___ for MY sake? Or does love for Him motivate me?
If I “should” exercise, or “shouldn’t” eat more, is it an expression of a heart beating for him? Or of love for the praise of man or looking good or being a certain size? Oh, that love for HIM would motivate my choices, my decisions, my steps in life, the way I spend my time!
What do I sigh over? What do I think about? These are clues about where my heart is. Does my heart beat for Jesus?
Oh, Lord, make it so!
How, Lord? How can I move from where I am to where I want to be?
The Scripture tells me there are three things:
Remember, repent, and do.
I am changed. I am stirred. I am touched…again.
Thank you, Lord! Amazing love, how can it be!
For me, on a somewhat superficial level, this means I don’t use the number on the label (size!) to club myself over the head–OR to pat myself on the back. I don’t puff up over having been to the gym four times in one week. Do I really think this is the abundant life that Jesus died to give me (John 10:10)? As CS Lewis said, I am playing in mud puddles in the slum when I could have a lovely holiday at the seashore!
When I am most in love with Jesus prayer is as breathing to me in the rhythms of the day. In and out…“Yes, Lord, I want YOUR will…” Listening… “Yes, Lord, I will obey you…” Waiting…listening for the sweetness of his prompting and loving the sweetness of obeying. Even when it means dying to self.
Dying…
…to self…
Even when self is being “so good…”
This is so much deeper–and harder–than “weight loss” or “controlling my eating.” I NEED the Lord in order to be able to accurately respond to my body’s cues to eat and then to stop when I am no longer hungry. I NEED the Lord to move my body as a delightful expression of worship. Only loving him would motivate me to die to self with its desperate insistence to DO things with puffed up pride. So often, I love food so much more that I love Him, I am sad to say. So often, I seem to love lethargy…my tendency for my rear to grow roots in a chair…
Today, I will remember, repent and do…
The one thing that Jesus has said to me today in my time with him is “Love me again…with the love you once knew.”
Yes, Lord…take my heart. I abandon it to you. Take all I try to do to “be good,” or “right,” or “thin,” or….whatever else. I just want to love you.
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