by Heidi Bylsma | Dec 4, 2008 | Blog
Funny how it is…the very thing I studied in the morning yesterday is what I needed desperately to apply by mid-day…but I acted clueless, reckless, and rebellious, instead.
This lesson on Vigilance that I did yesterday morning reminded me of the “Planning for Trials” exercise in the Thin Within book.
Thin Within or The Lord’s Table is not a diet. It isn’t about “getting fixed” or “getting thin” and then going back to the “real world” after 30 or 60 days or 6 weeks. This is about a heart change…a change from within. These kinds of changes take a lifetime!
It is about completely altering our reason for eating and our eating habits. (TLT, p. 77)
This lesson reminded me that if I think I have my act together and can just sort of coast along without a care in the world, it is important to take to heart the words of 1 Corinthians 10:12 which says, “Therefore, let him who thinks he stands take heed that he does not fall.”
It is pretty easy to have a period of coasting along in my eating…and now that I have lost all the weight and kept it off to even think “Yup, I am changed for GOOD, all right!”
Then, reality check… I am reminded when I let my guard down how much work there is yet ahead inside.
This lesson encouraged me to think of some possible challenges that are ahead. I realized yesterday that today I would face a challenge and so prayed through and considered that and how I will plan for it that I might remain humbly vigilant and dependent on the Lord, not floundering when the emotions that are bound to come hit me.
So my battle plan for *today* was in place *yesterday*…but what about the day immediately in front of me yesterday? I was broadsided and NOT vigilant!
I am teaching my son to drive and I really harp on the need to be defensive in his driving–to plan not *if* someone veers into your lane, but WHEN. Not IF an animal will run into the road in front of you but WHEN. I tell him again and again to plan for that. When it is an animal, to tell yourself again and again you will NOT swerve as it is unlikely to be done safely on our roads. We live in the country…two lane roads, steep canyon cliffs down one side and mountain walls on the other. Animals in the road and motorists not paying attention (or worse) are going to happen. If you rehearse in your mind again and again the safest plan of action, it is more likely that you will DO it when the thing actually happens.
So I must “drive defensively” through this life. That is what vigilance is. It is anticipating not IF I will be drawn to food again, not IF my emotions will get the best of me, not IF I will have some “ain’t got it” moments (like my friend Julie says), but WHEN.
A proud person will not plan for these things, but will think they are beyond that.
Matthew 26:41 Jesus encourages the disciples to watch and pray. We must be vigilant and defensive…guarded and ready. But being aware of what may be ahead isn’t enough. I must rehearse in my mind a godly response and, above all, pray about these things as well.
The lesson asked “What are some specific areas of temptation that you need to be watchful of and pray about?”
How about you? How can you exercise more humble vigilance? What may face you today that you know you need to plan for so that you are not taken by surprise and dragged into disordered eating yet again?
I am praying about something that will happen early this morning and I hope to report back at the end of the day, that, yes, I was humbly vigilant and remained guarded and didn’t allow myself to stomp all over godly boundaries of 0 – 5 eating that the Lord has directed me to have. When I eat today, I want it to be for nourishment, not out of frustration, sadness, or confusion.
I would welcome your prayers!
by Heidi Bylsma | Dec 2, 2008 | Blog
As has been mentioned throughout the workbook so far, as is mentioned in Thin Within and the Hallidays’ other book, Get Thin Stay Thin (also known as Thin Again), we have a deep thirst within us…a soul thirst. Much of our lives are spent searching for “fountains” or sources to slake the thirst.
This lesson exposes the tendency we have to go to food or anything other than Christ to satisfy the thirst of our hearts.
This lesson calls us to rise up and commit to going no where else to drink, but Christ. In my own life, I know that I have turned to my horses to find some sort of satisfaction, peace, and joy…delight. Even looking to my family to provide that deep joy…well, Christ alone is to be the water from which I drink to meet those deep needs in my heart.
Approval of others, recognition, being “The Thin Within Lady…” none of these things are to be where I look for SOUL satisfaction.
Christ alone is to provide that for me.
The author makes an important distinction:
Drinking implies taking something into your system and receiving nourishment and sustenance from it. I can read that Jesus is the Bread of Life and not feed on Him, or that He is Living Water but still not drink of Him. Feeding and drinking are directly related to the application of Scripture in my life, and it is much more than mere reading. Mere reading of Scripture would be like reading the nutritional contents of a package of food; it does no good to the body until it is eaten and digested. When you read the Scripture, ask God to apply it to your heart and to change your life by the reading of it. This is what it means to drink the Living Water. (TLT, p. 74)
As I go through life, I make a choice–there are many fountains I might be tempted to look to for satisfaction of my heart thirst. Hobbies can be a “false fountain,” food, numbing out with a movie or internet stuff (even hanging out on the Thin Within forums!)…but I am to be resolved, committed, determined to look to nothing or no one else other than Jesus for the quenching of my soul thirst.
by Heidi Bylsma | Dec 1, 2008 | Blog
The primary text for this lesson is found in Romans 12:1-2:
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
For me, this lesson summarizes the very reason why I chose to do The Lord’s Table workbook at this time.
If I change my eating habits (which I have), if I lose all the extra weight (which I have), but am not transformed from the INSIDE out, then the changes will be temporary at best and not the type of change that matters most. What matters MOST is my heart. This isn’t about my food or weight. I see no place in scripture where God says “Thou shalt not weigh 185 pounds…or 250 pounds.” I DO see many scriptures about my heart, surrender, not being greedy or idolatrous…THESE are the things that I want to be sure I deal with by the grace and power of the Holy Spirit.
I choose this day to offer my body to God, yes…I will be a living sacrifice. But not just my body, but my mind. Therefore, I will not minimize a choice in the moment. I will agree with God that this moment matters as in this moment, I can make a choice. That choice can add another layer of hard callus tissue to my heart, or it can soften my heart. In a moment, I can do something that matters that much.
Every moment matters. I will choose to allow the Lord to renew my mind and transform me from within.
by Heidi Bylsma | Nov 30, 2008 | Blog
The primary text for today’s lesson was Numbers 21:4-9. The author did an amazing job illuminating how this passage can relate to our desire to overcome sinful eating habits and experience victory in our lives. He used many other passages as well and then summarized as follows:
So to summarize the passages we have read today, we are to look to Jesus to save us, to eradicate sin in our lives, to strengthen us for the battle, to defeat all our enemies, to release us from the trap of sin, to restore us and give us grace, to enable us to be victorious. See why focusing on Christ is so important? (TLT, p. 70)
I have mentioned in previous entries that I had gotten things backwards…that I was waiting until the temptation comes to think that I am to cling to Christ. Truthfully, clinging to and feasting on Christ is to be a way of life, permeating the moments of each day.
BUT, this lesson brought home to my heart the fact that in the moment, when temptation is ever before me, this IS, indeed, a moment to FOCUS on him as well.
Just last night, I wish I had applied these truths. I was watching a movie with the family–we had enjoyed a wonderful time together all day and were winding down before bed. I had a thought of leftover apple pie, vanilla ice cream and whipped cream. I wasn’t hungry. I just wanted it. I battled with the temptation for a while. But I kept trying to pull my thoughts off of the ice cream. There it is again…that old “Do NOT think about a pink elephant” syndrome! (Try it…right now…do NOT think of a pink elephant…and what do you think of? :-))
So the more I tried NOT to think about the pie that I wanted to eat, the more I thought about it. Until, sadly, I gave in!
This lesson today reminded me (you would think I wouldn’t need so many reminders!!!) that I was focusing on the strength of the army against me…on the temptation, on the sinful option if you will. My vision was filled with what I was NOT to go after.
What I should have done in the moment is focus on Christ. Look up and see the serpent on the pole…Jesus took on all my sin and shame. The perfect, blameless son of God, the Glory of Heaven who became man, who knew no sin became sin for me so that in Him I might become the righteousness of God. Like the Israelites in the passage from Numbers, had I chosen to look on Christ, to focus on HIM, the author and perfector of my faith, I know that the lure of the pie would have diminished. Instead I tried NOT to think of the pie.
See the difference?
On the cross, Jesus took the lethal bite of the serpent, became sin and died for us. As we are looking at Him to cure us, over time we will discover that overeating loses it’s appeal and we are cured. (TLT, p. 68)
So while it is true that I want to feast on the Lord, His Word and pray throughout the moments of my life–not just wait until I am tempted–it is also true that when I *am* tempted, I MUST choose to focus not on trying NOT to sin, but on the Lord, on Jesus. As I focus on HIM, the appeal of sin will diminish.
Lord, please help me to be willing to have you change me in the moment. Change my “want to” so that in the moment I *want* to think on you and be transformed. Take my moments Lord…and be Lord in the moments today. When I am tempted, please help me not to try to grit my teeth and garner up the will-power not to sin, but, instead, cause me to fix my eyes on you. Thank you, Lord. Amen.
Turn your eyes upon Jesus.
Look full in His wonderful face.
Then the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
in the light of His glory and grace.
by Heidi Bylsma | Nov 29, 2008 | Blog
If you are evaluating whether or not to get The Lord’s Table workbook, then I hope you won’t allow my descriptions to stand in the way! They really fall far short of the real thing. There is something so powerful about sitting down with the Word, a journal, a pen, a workbook and allowing God to move in your heart personally. These daily summaries are woefully inadequate in effectively stating what God can do through this material.
Today’s lesson raised the question about why, when God was preparing to take the Israelites out of Egypt…why did they have to eat the Passover Lamb while they had their sandals on, staff in hand and their loins girded (Exodus 12:11)…while they were ready to head out? What was the significance of this and is there a modern day lesson to glean from this?
Truly, it was like the Lord ordered them to have a feast, but simultaneously ordered them to pack up the car and to have the engines running as they ate! So what was up with this? It definitely sounds counter to “conscious eating!” 🙂
Mike Cleveland does an excellent job of pointing out that the way OUT of slavery first comes by partaking of, ingesting in, feasting on THE LAMB OF GOD. This is the heart of The Lord’s Table message. As we take our hunger to the Lord, to Jesus, to His Word and truly allow HIM to satisfy and sustain us…as we put THAT in our lives as FIRST priority, eclipsing all others…we are taking the first steps out of our slavery. The way out of our slavery to sinful eating habits and a heart that is locked on to food is to feast on what will really nourish us…the Lord Himself.
The Israelites literally ate their way out of slavery! And so can we! This is the message that is taught to us today: When we feed on the Passover Lamb we will leave slavery. Amazing how we can win the battle of overeating, by eating! (TLT, p. 65)
There is a way out of slavery to sinful habits! It is through feeding on Jesus Christ. As we become full of Him, through meditating on the Bible and living it out, we will discover our freedom. Freedom follows fullness. (TLT, p. 65)
I think for a long while I have had this backwards. It is like I think…well, when I am tempted, I will feast on the Lord. The truth is, I must LIVE feasting on him. I must partake of him constantly. Then, the temptations won’t be as strong. Controlling my food intake just makes me fixate on the food all the more. If I place those energies on turning to GOD, I sort of think that I will be heading on out in that moment…out of that place of temptation, out of the moment of struggle with indiscretion and blatant sin.
…correct eating habits and honoring the Lord with our bodies are by-products of “feeding” on Jesus Christ through thinking on, meditating on, and acting on Scripture. (TLT, p. 65)
After establishing this in the lesson, the author offered numerous passages for contemplation and response. The passages focused on Christ’s sufficiency to be our sastifaction. This is what we really YEARN for! This is what we really want. HIM! We take HIM in, we chew on and digest HIM, when we sit still for a bit and read and ponder and pray over His Word. I know this is true in my own experience.
Yesterday was a difficult day. Nothing earth shattering compared to what normal people experience. I tend to lead a very sheltered life. I have very few trials that have faced me in my adult life. In fact, I have this attitude of expectancy…that something horrible is going to happen. 🙁 Not a good thing. But when it comes to trials, it doesn’t take much for me to think I am suffering. Yesterday was one of those days when I felt pushed emotionally (and because of circumstances, this is likely to continue today as well). Had I allowed myself to be drawn to the WORD, the BREAD of LIFE, the life-giving WATER, I am convinced that I would have never even thought about food. Instead, I was restless, agitated and had a couple of eating occasions where I ate outside of my boundaries. It wasn’t about the food. It was about my heart…I want to interpret my trials as a personal call–an invitation–from God to come and sit at His table–even before I even have a chance to consider sitting at the dining table (or standing at the counter) to eat physical food. I want to interpret unsettled emotions as God’s invitation to recline with him, to lean against his chest. To be still and KNOW he is God. To rest in His embrace. To quietly hear Him rejoice over me with singing…
Today, Lord, let this be.
by Heidi Bylsma | Nov 28, 2008 | Blog
The text for today’s lesson is Psalm 107:10-16. I suggest prayerfully studying this passage. The study basically had me doing the following (this isn’t quite how he did it…I am modifying it…I suggest getting the workbook to really experience the depth of this study!):
1. What is the condition of the people in this passage?
2. Can you identify with any of this description, relative to your own battle with overeating/gluttony and your heart’s attachment to food? How so?
3. WHY were these people in this condition? (see vs. 11)
4. What happened to them before they cried out to God for help? (see vs. 12)
5. Has your over-eating caused you to experienced “bitter labor?” How so? Have you stumbled? In what way? Have you come to a point of realizing (accepting) that no human or human-devised program can help?
6. What did the people in this passage do? (vs. 13a)
7. List all the things that God did for them in response to their cry.
These people had rebelled against the LORD. Can you identify with this? I know I sure can! For years, I knew God’s answer to my problem, my sin. In fact, I had written about it when I collaborated with the Hallidays on the Thin Within book! I took half-hearted stabs at living the way I knew I should, but it was more mechanics…I refused to surrender my heart. I continued in darkness. I rebelled against God and spurned His counsel. He allowed me to experience my slavery…”bitter labor.” He humbled me and I knew no one could help me except the Lord. I literally came to the end of myslef, fearing that I would wake up dead.
I see now that there has to be a humbling, a breaking, a total submissive turning. God works this in us. When I called out to him for help but continued in my rebellion, He didn’t free me. I still clung to my idol. I couldn’t grasp the life rope when I held tightly, in pride, to food–to having what I want when I want it.
When I stopped clinging to food and to having MY way and called to Him, His salvation came. My hands and heart were free to grab a hold of His offer for deliverance. It was a process, but this was the beginning of the process. He has done so much for me and he continues to as well.
These verses tell us that when God saves someone He destroys the work of the devil in their lives. He frees from the grip of the devil, removes oppression (though not temptation), rescues from slavery to sin and sets us free. We must ever pray for ongoing help and be on guard against backsliding, but the work of salvation is thorough and ongoing deliverance from sin. (TLT, p. 62)
Hallelujah! What a great Savior!
