We have tools to use on this journey toward intuitive eating. Some come naturally and some come with some pain, but they all lead to a closer relationship with the Lord and they all lead to healing if we do the work needed to get there.
It started with a negative emotion. Anger. I had an issue going on in my life that was making me angry. And, it wasn’t just the anger that was causing problems but the obsessive thoughts that went along with the anger. My thoughts and obsessions about what was going on was becoming an idol and they were making me want to break my eating boundaries.
I’ve been in this community for almost two years, so I know the right tools to use when these situations come up, but I wasn’t using them. I had grown accustomed to dwelling on the problem. Have you ever felt like that? Sometimes we are so comfortable with the bad feelings that it takes a special circumstance to get us to want to change.
My special circumstance is taking a small group of ladies through Taste for Truth by Barb Raveling. I felt as a leader that it was about time I use our tools to work through what I was feeling. So I did. The first thing I did was make a commitment to my small group to go through the Anger and Annoyance questions in “I Deserve a Donut” by Barb Raveling. I completed my commitment, but it was difficult. I was weeping by the time I finished just the first couple of questions. Wow, now I know why it is so hard to actually do what helps us! I have to admit that even though it was difficult, I felt better when I completed my task.
The next day our lesson was on Truth Journaling. I took what I had written for the first question and used that for truth journaling. This opened my eyes to some things where I was in the wrong and believed lies instead of the truth.
The following day, I went back to complete our lesson on Day 21. I once again used my anger issue for this lesson. Barb asked us on Day 21 in Taste for Truth to focus on a trial that is going on right now. Then read Hebrews 12:1-15 and record everything it says about how God wants me to handle this trial and what He is hoping I will get out of it. Here is what I learned:
Lord, You want me to lay aside the weight of this trial. It is not mine to carry.
Lord, carrying weight that is not mine to carry is a sin. It is in essence saying that I should take care of my own trial instead of taking it to You. Lord, keep me from being ensnared by obsessive thinking which draws me into sin.
Lord, You are calling me to endure this race I am running to You.
Lord, You are telling me that the way to endure is to keep my eyes on You.
Lord Jesus, You are the source and perfecter of my faith. I can’t grow in my faith without You.
Lord Jesus, You called me as Your own and You feel joy in that.
Lord Jesus, You endured the pain of the cross and suffered the shame of crucifixion for me, one of the sheep in Your fold. I praise You as You sit at Father God’s right hand in glory!
Lord, as I look at Your example I see that as I walk with You and lean on You that I will not grow weary and lose heart.
Lord, in my struggles against sin I am not doing well in resisting the pull. Lord, help me keep my eyes on You. Renew my mind as I turn to You.
Lord, I am Your child; Your daughter. Let me not take Your discipline lightly. I know that Your discipline shows Your love for me. You desire my growth into the likeness of Jesus and You want Your will and glory to show forth from my life. That’s what I want too Lord!
Lord, I can endure this suffering as Your loving discipline. Lord, show me what You want me to learn from this trial and show me how to use this knowledge to help others.
Lord, do not let me forget that I am Your child and that You love me.
Lord, I submit to Your discipline for my growth. Transform me and my life Lord. Make me holy for You are holy.
Lord, even though I feel emotional pain right now, I know that Your discipline will lead to and yield the fruit of peace and righteousness.
Lord, I submit and surrender to Your training.
Lord, strengthen my tired hands and my weakened knees. I want my life to reflect Your glory and to show how You grow and transform me.
After working through this issue using the tools we have at our fingertips, I felt healed from my negative feelings. I shared with my friend and accountability partner Deanna Lewis that I felt like I had been washed on an old fashioned wash board, put through a wringer and now I have been hung up on a wash line to hang in the healing light of the SON! It was hard. It was difficult. But it was so worth it!
If you are dealing with negative feelings and emotions that make you want to break your eating boundaries, may I introduce you to Freedom from Emotional Eating by Barb Raveling? There is more work for me to do and I am happy to announce that Deanna Lewis and I will be offering a group study of this book starting in mid-September that will end by the end of November.
This class is for people who already have the basics of Thin Within down and are ready for the next level.
We will not be discussing weight, diets or any jargon regarding good or bad food choices. This way, we can be free to not be tempted to return to diet mentality while God is healing us from emotional eating.
Right now I am involved in a study called “A Taste for Truth” by Barb Raveling. It’s a great way to learn to renew my mind and fits nicely with eating “intuitively”, or 0-5. A few days ago, I joined the discussion on the chapter regarding emotional eating. My good friend Deanna Burris, who is leading the class asked us some questions and gave some advice that I wanted to share with you.
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Do you remember the first time you ate for emotional reasons?
Gals, we have tools to use that will sidetrack our desires to eat emotionally today. We can renew our minds before we eat out of our emotions. If we miss renewing our minds before eating, we can renew our minds after and that will bring us closer to making this a habit.
Barb says at the end of this lesson, “When we stuff our emotions with food, we miss out on so much. We can change that by developing a habit of going to God to talk through all those hard situations in our lives that make us want to eat for emotional reasons.”
Share what you discovered about those “Hard Things” in your life as you worked through today’s Bible Study.
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Emotional eating came early in life for me.
I was put on a diet at 5 yrs old and wasn’t allowed to have sweets. However, my sister was allowed to have them because she was skinny and I was not.
I remember feeling ugly and unloved while my sister was the favored one.
The first memory I have of emotional eating was probably when I was around 8 years old. My family was visiting my aunt’s house and she had a bowl of candy on her coffee table. At one point I was alone in the living room and so I saw an opportunity to eat candy. As I was eating it, I remember how good I felt and powerful and loved! Thus began my pattern of sneaking food. This is the beginning of my unhealthy relationship as food being my friend and comforter.
From the time I was a child, I learned that food helped ease the sadness and feelings of being unloved or insecure with myself. It made me feel like I had power when I would sneak food. I have learned now that I have done this into adulthood without even realizing it. As I used food to cope since early childhood, it became ingrained in me to respond to emotions with food.
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··· God Gives Hope! ···
God has opened my eyes to my emotional eating thru the book “HUNGER WITHIN”. He continues to show me ways to STOP this behavior thru the study of the book “A TASTE FOR TRUTH”. Renewing my mind about my identity in Jesus helps me a lot. Scripture about God being in control and His love and provision also keep me feeling secure in Him and I don’t reach for the food. I have learned that food is a lier. It is certainly NOT my friend and DOES NOT love me back! I am learning with these tools God has given me that only HE truly satisfies.
He loves me right now, right here wherever I am on the journey.
Food is just a tool for nourishing my body.
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.God has more work to do with me regarding emotional eating. Because of this, I am excited to announce that Deanna Burris and I will be offering a group study of Barb Raveling’s book “Freedom from Emotional Eating”. We will start in mid September and end by the end of November.
This class is for people who already have the basics of Thin Within down and are ready for the next level.
We will not be discussing weight, diets or any jargon regarding good or bad food choices. This way, we can be free to not be tempted to return to diet mentality while God is healing us from emotional eating.
I admit it! I have some clothes that just do not fit!
Mostly, they are too tight! I have kept them in my closet even though they haven’t fit for years. Yes, friends. These are my “skinny clothes” and really are out of style. These few favorite pieces of mine are from a time when I was much smaller than I am now. This was a time when I got down to my “goal weight” with Weight Watchers. I even worked for them! BUT, in order to maintain my “lifetime” status, I had to eat very little and exercise a whole lot! I was hungry and got tired of eating the foods from my “zero point” list. I had to exercise more and more to earn points to eat and was terrified of missing a workout. I was also terrified of gaining weight.
This was not living in freedom!
So why am I holding on to these clothes that were from a time in my life when I was completely entrenched in diet living? Isn’t it really diet mentality that tells me to hold on to these clothes “just in case” I may ever be that size again? You know. When I find that perfect “diet”?
WAIT! I’m DONE WITH DIETING!
It’s time to give those clothes away!
SPIRITUAL OBJECT LESSON
When I think about getting rid of clothes that hold me back to that diet mentality, I am reminded of something that was in the sermon at church on Sunday.
In Colossians 3 and Ephesians 4 we are told that we are supposed to put off the old self or “clothes” and be clothed with the “new self” or a new attitude.
Therefore, if you have been raised with Christ, keep seeking the things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Keep thinking about things above, not things on the earth, for you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God…….So put to death whatever in your nature belongs to the earth: sexual immorality, impurity, shameful passion, evil desire, and greed which is idolatry…… You also lived your lives in this way at one time……But now, put off these old clothes…..Put off the old clothes with its practices. You have been clothed with the new man that is being renewed in knowledge according to the image of the One who created it. (Colossians 3:1-3,5-8a,10 NET bible)
Everyday we are called by God to put off or take off the old clothes and to put on the clothes of our new life. So we take off those old, soiled, smelly clothes of our old self (for us in this setting, it may be taking off the diet mentality, beating ourselves up, not loving our bodies, perfectionism, etc. or overeating ) and get rid of them. But something happens overnight. When we wake up the next morning, and hanging on the closet door in plain view of our eyes are our old clothes! Only now they look bright, clean and oh so alluring! They are comfortable. They are what we like or are used to. They call to us. They whisper our name. BUT, they drag us down and away from the wonderful and FREE life in Christ. AND, guess what? They lie to us, for now that we have learned a new way to live in Christ, these old clothes REALLY DO NOT FIT US ANY MORE!
God has another plan for us. He has a new set of clothes that is our new self. We may need help putting on these clothes and NOT changing back into the old clothes. That is why we have the Holy Spirit to help us. He will help us with this new way of living. This new way is peace and life and FREEDOM.
So, now back to those clothes in my closet that don’t fit.
I am GETTING RID OF THEM!
No need to have clothes that not only don’t fit, but also keep me longing for an impossible body shape and size.
So, why go back to our old ways, our old life, our old sin?
Lets take off these old, smelly clothes!
They really don’t fit us anymore, despite how comfy they may seem!
Let’s put on our NEW CLOTHES and walk in the way that leads to LIFE!
“If you faced any challenges in this last month, raise your hand!”
Several months ago I wrote a blog about this. Over the last month or so, I found I needed to revisit it as a reminder to myself! I can imagine that a lot of us who read this can relate to challenges that happen from time to time. Maybe you face challenges every day! So, I think it is worth looking at this subject again.
Body Challenges
One BIG challenge I am facing every day is with my body. I am currently going through menopause (or have hit menopause….) and my body is doing some strange (and unexpected) things! One thing in particular that I really don’t like is my body just doesn’t want to release weight but instead would rather shift it to different areas of my body! Add to that hot flashes, occasional dizziness and appetite spikes and cravings.
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Other Challenges
Another challenge has been many different and big life changes going on with my family. My son just graduated from college, my husband just resigned from his ministry position at our church (he was bi-vocational) and I just went full-time at my job. (which will not make up the difference financially….but that’s another story of faith!)
.Add to that my family coming to town for my son’s graduation (I wrote about that in an earlier blog).
Then for his graduation trip, we went to Disney World for a week! Yes, it was fun, but can we say FOOD, FOOD, FOOD???
I found it has been difficult to stay focused and eat mindfully with all the challenges going on.
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All of us can relate to the struggles of life.
You might have three little ones running around and pulling at you from every direction.
You might be one of those people that have to carpool all over the place and that is your life.
You might be someone who has a sickness in your family or you are a caregiver for your aging parent.
You can fill in the blank.
We all know that life can be stressful and unpredictable.
How in the world do we stay focused?
How in the world do we not just jump right back into a pan of brownies and swim around while throwing it all in our mouths? How do we keep from going back to food for comfort and sanity?
Although, I don’t have the answers to all of these questions, I can tell you what I do.
I just keep practicing.
I practice saying “no” when deep in my heart I already know that I don’t need the food.
I practice eating 0 to 5.
I practice the different keys to conscious eating that help me stay in my boundaries.
I can only do this in HIS strength, which means I also practice some other important things!
I surrenderthings to the Lord
Sometimes I am giving the Lord the same thing over and over because I’m going through a hard time. That’s what I have to do. I surrender it up to the Lord and I lay it down at his feet.
I take time to spend with the Lord.
Even if it’s just a sentence prayer in the shower or praying while I’m washing the dishes. It may even be just singing a simple praise song over and over again. It may be renewing my mind with His word or listening to worship music.
I know that if I seek Him, keep renewing my mind with His truth and try to follow Him as best I can then I will remember:
HE IS BY MY SIDE. ALWAYS. NO MATTER WHAT.
He will meet me where I am and give me the strength to carry on.
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I DO NOT practice BEATING MYSELF UP!
I don’t practice beating myself up when I mess up. I have to stop and I have to just take a moment to say,
“Lord I knew that that extra piece of pie was not going to make me feel better. I thank you that after I took one bite, I realized it and I knew I wasn’t hungry and so I stopped.”
I don’t beat myself up about the one bite. I celebrate the fact that I only took one and I walked away.
Maybe for you it’s that you ate the whole piece of pie (or whatever). BUT you don’t have to beat yourself up for the one piece. Celebrate the fact that you didn’t eat the whole pie! Try to look at the positive and cling to what God is doing in you!
I try to focus on the good things that God is doing. I try to thank HIM.
6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. 7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. -Philippians 4:6
This peace that he talks about may not be something that’s instantaneous in my soul but it is a peace that’s deep in my soul knowing that no matter what, He is still there with me.
Basically, it comes from building a relationship with the Lord. Relationships don’t come easy and they don’t come instantaneously. There’s a give and take in relationships. And it is the same with the Lord. I’m not going to be perfect. Only God is. I can rely on His perfection to help me get through the rough times.
So, no matter what rough time you might be facing….how big or how little… remember to PRACTICE.
PRACTICE relying on Him, renewing your mind with His truth, surrendering to Him and allowing Him to love you through it all.
Last week I shared with you my “dirty little secret”, about how I wanted to give up and was so discouraged because my body was not releasing weight. I have been so frustrated because I *felt* like I have been eating between hunger and fullness! Why, oh why have I not been releasing weight but seem to be going in the wrong direction? I was even tempted to go back to a diet!
The thought of going back to a diet is like asking me to go back to prison!
I just can’t do that!
So, As I usually do, I cried out to the Lord to show me what HE wants me to do with all of this. I have been praying and seeking HIM.
The next day, I wanted to share what God revealed to me with my good friend and accountability partner, Deanna Burris (who is another author for this blog). We feel comfortable enough to be honest with each other and so I had already shared my frustrations with her.
And now, I want to share it with you:
Good Morning, Dear Friend.
I think God has whispered something to me today. I have been wondering (more than praying….) about what to do regarding my weight gain. I have been thinking about diet pills, trying “healthy eating”, reading another intuitive eating book ….just whatever.
Do I REALLY want to go back to the diet lies???
Also, God has shown me that I’ve been lying to myself….
He has shown me the TRUTH
This morning the Lord ever so gently showed me that although I think I’m eating 0-5, I am not eating mindfully. I am distracted most of the time and honestly, with letting go of some of my co-dependent behavior, feeling full (probably an 8) brings me emotional comfort.
So lately I say I have been eating in my boundaries, but when examining and getting real with myself, I have not. And I think there probably have been many more times that I have had the blinders on about this.
BUT HERE’S THE GOOD NEWS!
Instead of guilt, I am feeling HOPE!
There is hope because it’s NOT Thin Within that’s “not working” but I’ve not been honest with myself. Also, I am not beating myself up about my body or how I’ve been coping with things.
I am going g to prayerfully seek the Lord in this now that He’s shown me some things.
I admit to feeling a little rebellious in that I don’t want to stop eating over the counter or while watching TV. (The Lord gently showed me that I now rarely eat without doing these things).
I’ve gone back to eating out of large bags of food instead of serving myself a small portion.
When I look back on the last year, I see that I only have rare days when I stay within these secondary boundaries, thinking I can just listen to my stomach. But what happens is THIS:
Because I’m distracted, I’m not really listening.
I’m just stopping when I feel like it and have eaten more than I really needed (I think a 6 or 7 has become my new 5). No condemnation here, just being honest with myself.
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ACTION PLAN
I am going to give my body grace with its shape since I am in menopause.
I have gone thru loads of BIG stresses (and am doing some hard and deep work with in myself with the LORD…some huge layers of grave clothes God is working on and has been for a while…). So there is GRACE there, too in regards to how my body has been reacting.
I am going to be on my face before the Lord for direction on what secondary boundaries HE wants for me so that my primary boundaries (0-5) can be kept on a regular basis.
I am opening my hands that have been grasping food for comfort etc. and grabbing on to JESUS, HIS PLAN for me and HIS FREEDOM.
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Most of all……I am surrendering to HIM.
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ALL TO JESUS,
I SURRENDER
I SURRENDER ALL.
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What about you? When you examine yourself, do you find there are things you need to surrender to the Lord? Are you being honest with yourself? Are there boundaries you might have let “slip”. If this is so, TAKE HEART and have HOPE for HE has given us the tools we need in Thin Within and Hunger Within. Let’s use these tools that have been given to us!
I forgot something very important last week that nearly sent me on a downward spiral. I am praising the Lord for helping me to remember this important bit of information. I forgot that when Jesus Christ died on the cross for me and was resurrected and because I have placed my faith and trust in Him as my Savior and Lord, that I have His power to say no to sin.
He broke the power of sin in my life.
I think I became forgetful because we are going into the summer months. It’s during the summer months that many of us “take time off” from activities we do during the school year: like corporate Bible Study and co-leading classes for Thin Within/Hunger Within. I know that if I hit the summer without a plan in place, I tend to flounder and waste time. I tend to use the freedom from activity as an excuse to be lazy. And, this past week I used the excitement of upcoming freedom to put me in a dangerous place concerning my disordered eating.
Yes, through Christ Jesus, I am free from the power of sin, but that doesn’t give me the right to freely sin.
I wonder if you can identify with me. See, I was looking at freedom from weekly responsibilities as an opportunity to run wild so to speak. I know it is easier for me to keep my focus on the Lord in what I am doing when I have responsibilities. They give me things that I have to get done in my spare time. But, sometimes I get tired and in my tiredness, I start to look forward to some freedom. With the summer months in front of me, I started relishing the freedom ahead, forgetting that I am not good with too much free time on my hands. So, I started eating outside of hunger again. I couldn’t understand what was happening until I took it to the Lord. He showed me that even though I thought I wanted the freedom that the summer would bring, I was really afraid of the freedom. Why was I afraid? He showed me that I hadn’t made a plan to take Him into that freedom. Without Him in my free time, I don’t have His power to say no to sin. It is only through Him that sin has no power over me.
Running wild into freedom without Christ Jesus is no freedom at all. It is running straight back into bondage.
There is an old saying that I heard at a 12 Step meeting years ago that goes, “An addict lost in his own mind is in enemy territory.” I’m going to expound on that to say, “An addict lost in too much freedom without Christ along is in enemy territory.” That is where I found myself.
So, what did I do? I asked the Lord to help me. He helped me remember that I have an accountability partner in Thin Within (if you don’t have one, I highly recommend you get one ASAP). I reached out and found out that we both were struggling. God is so good! We had a divine appointment. My accountability partner and I have agreed to stay in contact daily via text or personal message, and voice to voice via phone on a more regular basis. We are being vulnerable and admitting our weaknesses to one another and to Jesus. We are sharing our 0 to 5 eating, our plans for renewing our minds, our temptations and our victories.
I am no longer afraid of the freedom of summer because I have asked Jesus and my friend to walk with me.
Dear reader, the moral of what I just shared is simple. If you are finding yourself in eating situations that leave you feeling unsettled, unhappy and condemned, would you consider doing what I did, and take them to the Lord, surrender to His wisdom and accept what He shows you? Look for those He has placed around you and reach out to them. There is freedom ahead and you don’t have to walk into it alone.
If you are dealing with negative feelings and emotions that make you want to break your eating boundaries, may I introduce you to Freedom from Emotional Eating by Barb Raveling? There is more work for me to do and I am happy to announce that Deanna Lewis and I will be offering a group study of this book starting in mid-September that will end by the end of November.
(or have hit menopause….) and my body is doing some strange (and unexpected) things! One thing in particular that I really don’t like is my body just doesn’t want to release weight but instead would rather shift it to different areas of my body! Add to that hot flashes, occasional dizziness and appetite spikes and cravings.
